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ORIGINAL: candystripper

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ORIGINAL: dovie
candystripper,

just curious...........was your other screen name "pinksugarsub" or the like? your pattern is oddly like hers.

dovie

Yes dovie.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1961881/tm.htm

canddystripper

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ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

Whats with the moccasins and the ballet shoes and ... and... well... jeeez, I just dont know what to say.  What a bizarre profile, freaky journal and well…  well… I mean… hey lady, what is going on with all the screen names?

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ORIGINAL: beargonewild

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

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ORIGINAL: colouredin

See i personally DONT like profiles that simply list what they want, and im pretty sure that even if i was looking for 'the one' a list of stuff wouldnt bring me closer to knowing anything about them.

Relationships are based on learing about the person, asking questions and getting to know them, if you dont like asking questions you probably wont much like a relationship. My profile says nothing about the 'type' of person i want because my experiance has been that my type and i dont tend to stay in a relationship or else i wouldnt be single now would i.

Coloredin, if you mean profies that say things like 'I like bondage, wax, breast play, anal, oral, and every other kink or fetish I've ever heard of' I couldn't agree more.  I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'.
 
BTW, ever had a Dom send you one of those to fill out?  I have --  about 75 items, which I was to mark on a scale of 1 to 5, as to whether I had done it yet or had an interest in it, etc.
 
Sorta like a D/s census taker, LOL.
 
candystripper

Without passing judgement, have a look at the other side of the coin, so to speak.
When a dom states right off what kinks they are into and what they don't like, isn't that letting you know up front about these things? Whether you realize it or not, during the "getting to know" stage, we all give our D/s checklist to a potential dom or sub and they do the same. It's what you call getting to know what the other person likes/dislikes. You'll carry a discussion about who you are as a person, what your likes/dislikes, wants, needs, what your looking for in a person, etc. these are a checklist also.

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ORIGINAL: LadyRainfire

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

*Sighs*  People on the boards have a sense of superiority over people who stay on the other side now? Gheesh.
 
But I wish you many, many happy years with Lumus, LadyRainfire.  He seems like a fine man.
 
candystripper

I really don't appreciate it when people put words in my mouth or make insinuations about me that are false. I've never claimed a sense of superiority over anyone, let alone you. Where you got that impression from my post is beyond my understanding. You claim to not like it when people pass judgement on you yet you are awfully fast to judge other people and find them lacking. I made no comment whatsoever about staying on the other side but merely stated that Lumus and I met here on the forums, starting as friends. Anyone who knows us knows we met in the Polls and Random Stupidity section of the forums. I merely offered one viewpoint of how people have met and found a wonderful partner here on CM, perhaps letting you know that there is more than one way of looking for that "One" you seek.

The whole point of the thread, which you addressed to "you lovely men" discounting (if not disrepecting) the female segment of CollarMe, was about profiles and the information people do, or do not, put on them, and how that can affect initial communication. I made the point that profiles are good for a look-see, for a person to see what they might have in common with someone, or if there is something there that absolutely goes against everything a person stands for. Profiles are a starting point to get to know someone. If you choose to move forward is totally up to you, no one is making you look at profiles or answer cmails as you well know. 

One thing I've learned over the years of working in customer service is that when customers keep complaining or having bad attitudes towards me, it's time for an attitude check of my own. Maybe you'd better look in the mirror and do your own attitude check.

And thanks for the wishes, he is a wonderful man and we're very happy together.

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

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ORIGINAL: beargonewild

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

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ORIGINAL: colouredin

See i personally DONT like profiles that simply list what they want, and im pretty sure that even if i was looking for 'the one' a list of stuff wouldnt bring me closer to knowing anything about them.

Relationships are based on learing about the person, asking questions and getting to know them, if you dont like asking questions you probably wont much like a relationship. My profile says nothing about the 'type' of person i want because my experiance has been that my type and i dont tend to stay in a relationship or else i wouldnt be single now would i.

Coloredin, if you mean profies that say things like 'I like bondage, wax, breast play, anal, oral, and every other kink or fetish I've ever heard of' I couldn't agree more.  I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'.
 
BTW, ever had a Dom send you one of those to fill out?  I have --  about 75 items, which I was to mark on a scale of 1 to 5, as to whether I had done it yet or had an interest in it, etc.
 
Sorta like a D/s census taker, LOL.
 
candystripper

Without passing judgement, have a look at the other side of the coin, so to speak.
When a dom states right off what kinks they are into and what they don't like, isn't that letting you know up front about these things? Whether you realize it or not, during the "getting to know" stage, we all give our D/s checklist to a potential dom or sub and they do the same. It's what you call getting to know what the other person likes/dislikes. You'll carry a discussion about who you are as a person, what your likes/dislikes, wants, needs, what your looking for in a person, etc. these are a checklist also.

bear, my profile already says I'm not interested in certain men, such as sadistic men.  It goes on to list some types of D/s play I enjoy.  But no, I don't 'screen' Doms for 'sexual compatibility' before I seek to learn whether I can even form a friendship with them.
 
If a Dom feels the most important thing to know about me is my bra size, he's not someone I'd ever be interested in.  If he cannot accept that I'm not willing to discuss D/s sex or play with a perfect stranger, he's again not someone I'd be interested in.
 
I do want a happy sex life with my Dom, complete with loads of fun play.  However, I will judge whether there's sexual compatibility as I always have; by smelling him, kissing him, etc.  If I don't feel it, it's not gonna happen.  There's absolutely no substitute for touch in learning whether a man could make me happy in bed.
 
Since I want a lifetime collar, I am more concerned with what sort of man he is, how he's lived his life so far, etc.  These things can be discussed -- assuming he's honest -- but sex and play?  To me discussing them is only wanking, and I am not wanker material.
 
Don't substitute my judgment for your own; search however suits your needs best, just as I will.
 
candystripper

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

<snip>...  I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'. 

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ORIGINAL: daddysliloneds

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

<snip>...  I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'. 

well i want to know about the man as well, but i'm the first to ask about d/s and kink interests it seems.  i could spend years getting to know someone and falling in love with the person i have come to know, but in one second that could all end; that's the second i find out that we're not kink or d/s compatable.

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ORIGINAL: daddysliloneds

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

<snip>...  I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'. 

well i want to know about the man as well, but i'm the first to ask about d/s and kink interests it seems.  i could spend years getting to know someone and falling in love with the person i have come to know, but in one second that could all end; that's the second i find out that we're not kink or d/s compatable.

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ORIGINAL: Maya2001

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ORIGINAL: daddysliloneds

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ORIGINAL: candystripper

<snip>...  I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'. 

well i want to know about the man as well, but i'm the first to ask about d/s and kink interests it seems.  i could spend years getting to know someone and falling in love with the person i have come to know, but in one second that could all end; that's the second i find out that we're not kink or d/s compatable.

Being a kink and fetish dating site where relationships are going to be based on D/s and kink to me this a very important issue to discuss  to ensure we are not wasting each others time...  we are  not teenage virgins  so should be adult enough to discuss or likes/dislikes /experiences and how we view D/s and the expectations,, if a Dom is starting it off  ordering you to finger youself or telling you to turn on your cam and perform ... then one can pretty safely assume they're dealing with a wantker  but a discussion about sex,kink, D/s  does not make a person a wanker.  and when these are the main components of this type of relationship it should be discussed early in the get to know stage.   As for profiles .. I don't need to read a biography  when I recieve an email that may of be of interest  I will scan over the profile  to get the main stuff  age , gender, skim over the profile itself to see if anything is incompatable and to see if relationship status is mentioned  which wil give me a rough idea of what I want to ask , they may have certain fetishes listed that may not be of interest to me .. I may ask them how important is it  to them to have in a relationship.. I know of a Dom who enjoys sadism with certain partners  those who are painsluts   and not with others.   ... for him it is not a must have in a relationship.  the profile is only a start place  through conversation you can learn what else their is to know

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Where did the <snip> come from?