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LadyPact -> RE: What are some things you do with your sub that aren't exactly *lifestyle* type activities? (7/4/2008 10:47:36 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Madame4a
I really dislike when I do something that someone decides is submissive or bottoming... in the end, dominance is about many things but its also about the dominant making the choices. I get to choose what I do or don't do. I like cooking; when I meet new prospects, its a rule I give them "I do the cooking unless I ask you do".
This evening is a good example. It makes no sense for my boi to cook. She is working all day and then coming over here. I'm going to guess we will be lucky if she gets here by 8pm. If I then wait for her to cook dinner it will be after 9 before we eat. I enjoy the creative part of cooking, among other things, so I'm cooking, by choice.
Being dominant means that I get to choose what I do and no one gets to label my activities anything except me.
This was absolutely excellent. There are a lot of activities that I enjoy, or are more practical, that some would consider 'submissive'. (I have certain posts out there regarding a particular one, but I'll keep this G rated.) My common reply is, no, they are not submissive. I am doing it because I want to, which leads Me back to My original answer in this thread.
There's really nothing I do that is solely for the benefit of a submissive. Anything that I do "for" him, I really also am doing for Me. If I stroked his hair, I didn't do it *just* for him. I also did it because I like doing it. That makes it for Me also.
Then again, I'm just weird like that. I also happen to be one of those people who believe there really is no such thing as a selfless good deed. Every good deed that I've ever done has also had a benefit for Me, even if it was just the good feeling that I made someone's day better.
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