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hisannabelle -> RE: na (7/3/2008 5:23:33 PM)
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greetings maggie,
honestly, it depends on a lot of things, and i wouldn't feel comfortable even expressing an opinion about a specific relationship without knowing firsthand what was going on - and maybe not even then. generally speaking, i would say that wanting to live as a worthless possession doesn't necessarily, in and of itself, mean someone's self-esteem is lacking (although i have to admit that i've met veeeery few people into 24/7 ownership who would want to be considered worthless, or treat their property as worthless). ultimately the only way to know if it would damage his self esteem is to try it and see how he copes with it.
in my own experience as an owned slave, my relationship has generally had positive effects on my self-esteem - but for me the fact that i am valued as property is integral to that, so as i said, the condition of being considered a worthless possession would probably change the experience a lot for me. something else to consider is that self-esteem is fluid, at least in my experience; in general, i have fairly good self-esteem but i have had experiences and things in my life that have damaged my self-esteem, and there are things in my relationship that are good for my self-esteem and also occasionally things that can lower it. in general, although i have very good self-esteem, it is of course subject to how i'm able to respond to conditions at any given time - and i'm not always able to respond well, so while i try to cultivate good self-esteem and keep a level head, i don't expect it to not be affected by what goes on around me, including my relationship. what i am trying to express is that even though certain conditions may affect someone's self-esteem, that doesn't have to mean that the relationship as a whole will be bad for them.
respectfully,
a'ishah.
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