RE: Do Dommes ever wish that --- (Full Version)

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Dari -> RE: Do Dommes ever wish that --- (7/13/2008 5:37:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HardToTame

If you are taking offense your taking what I've written out of concept.   If you want to call people 'master' and live in a dungeon, well, fine.  But, thats where I think you're focussing on the wrong part.   You say things like "have you ever trusted your life to a peice of rope?" well, I've absailed, (I think thats what it's called, down a cliffe face?) I've done all that trust exercise shit, and basically all I've learnt is never trust anyone who isn't you.  Which is exactly why I search for a bossy bitch who one day I can trust enough to explore those fetishes with with out being judged, and even having her enjoy them on the same level as I do.

How ever, I see no value in calling someone 'master' or 'mistress' in order to place that trust.  I see that as a comical, quirk to a lifestyle.  A fad, a gimmic.  Just like I see the leather, the whips, the dildos and the dungeons as a gimmic.  Part of a scene.  Like how people into Hip-Hop music might wear baggy jeans and their caps backwards or something.  How ever, I know alot of people out there into that who take it for what it is, music.  They don't need to conform to a image to enjoy it.  They make it PART of their lifestyle.  They dominate it, they don't let it dominate them.  Thats why I think alot of domme's here are, well actually not so domineering.  Because it appears to me they've been dominated by an image as opposed to making it part of their own.  If thats what they want to do fine, I respect that.  But, if your going to live as a sissy, than accept it and be prepaired for society to treat you as one.

If your going to make your life revolve around being a domme, as opposed to having it as part of your life, well be prepared to be treated as one.  And what do people say about others in society who are bossy, and nasty, and keep people under the whip? Not to be insulting, but as soon as they leave the copy machine the others are there saying "My God shes a bitch, I can't stand her".   And what do people say about men who are dominated by their woman when they're called home from the pub?  "Mate, that blokes pussy whipped." and it might be the case he gets treated like a pussy.  And so, if your going to commit your life to being a sissy or a bossy boots, then be prepaired to be treated like that.  I don't mean you personally, I mean the scene in general.  I have respect for life style people, just I treat them as what they are, which is what they have CHOSEN, themselves, to live their lives as.   I don't choose to live my life that way, only my SEX life, thus in the bedroom I might give in to some womans demands, but in real life I don't choose that, because I dominate that part of my life, I choose not to let it dominate me.


In your post, you pay lip service to having "respect for life style people" and you "treat them as what they are."  Then you say we're focusing on the wrong part, you imply that men who submit to dominant women are sissy, that women who dominate are bitches, that using the toys sadists and masochists enjoy for play are "gimmicks" and that using titles like "master" and "mistress" has no value, and in your opinion is a "comical, quirk to the lifestyle."

I'm not sure what I'm taking out of context here (context quoted above) but somehow I'm not exactly catching onto that respect you have for lifestylers.  You want a woman who's going to boss you around a bit, but not actually be dominant, and then maybe after you get involved in a relationship with her, you'll decide you want to try out more kink.  There's nothing wrong with that, it sounds like you're looking for an assertive woman who wants to get a little freaky in the bedroom.

I fail to see what it has to do with the topic though, except to say:  what you're looking for is not a D/s relationship, at least not with you in the submissive role.  What you're looking for is kink without submission.  That's not going to attract dominant women looking for submissive men, and truthfully, when you do start talking to dominant women and they realize what you're actually looking for, you're not going to hold their attention.  Some women like a bit of fighting, some don't.  But I don't know any dominant women in the lifestlye who value themselves so cheaply that they'd willingly get involved with someone who makes the kind of dismissive judgment calls you do about what we do and who we are.






HardToTame -> RE: Do Dommes ever wish that --- (7/14/2008 1:19:25 AM)

[8|] never mind little lady.. Never mind.  To be honest I really can't be arsed writing these few lines in response to that.  Just, I don't think you understand what I'm getting at, nor do I think you understand my, methods of communication.  My vocabulary.  But that's ok, it's tricky to understand me.  Sorry if I offended you, I didn't actually mean to, it's just how I word things sometimes.  But I know no better, and you might think of me as retarded for having a limited vocabulary and thats fine also.  Just, have fun and enjoy the good times [:D]  lets dance [:D]




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