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HarryVanWinkle -> Hoof in mouth, part 2, feeding (7/6/2008 3:32:42 PM)
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This is for situations when somebody else made a fool of themselves and you had the priviledge of showing him so, of jamming his foot down his throat all the way to the knee.
Again, I'll start;
It was the same location as the last story, The Southern Sun Groggery in Ft. Myers Beach, FL, early 1980's. I was sitting at the bar, flat broke, wanting to get drunk in the worst way and hoping somebody would start buying. In walked this guy I'd never seen before. He looked around, saw me sitting there by myself with no glass in front of me, came and sat beside me and ordered a pitcher and a glass for each of us.
As we started drinking, he started talking. As he was buying, I was listening, whatever he wanted to talk about.
What he wanted to talk about was Jews. He didn't approve of them. He didn't like them. He commenced to tell me every blood libel, ever malicious myth, ever slander that has ever been told about Jews for the last two thousand years.
I kept drinking his beer, througing in a, "Yeah?" "Uh huh?" "Really?" and whatnot whenever it seemed he wanted a response from me. And he kept buying more pitchers.
This went on for at least a couple of hours and way more than a couple of pitchers. Finally, at one point, he started getting really excited and said, "I mean... I mean... What religion are you?"
I batted my blue German eyes at him and asked, "Me?"
"Yeah," he answered, "what religion are you?"
"Me?" I batted again. "I'm Jewish."
The fact is I'd never been Jewish before, have never been Jewish since, but could not have been prouder to be a Jew than I was at that moment.
I have never seen a human being look more mortified in my life. Without saying another word, he got up, turned around and walked out of the bar, never to be seen again, at least by me.
The best part was, just as he headed out the door, the bartender set the fresh pitcher he'd just bought down in front of me.
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