|
Maxwell67 -> RE: yes or no (7/10/2008 3:44:26 PM)
|
There are many kinds of fights. If this is an issue concerning our dynamic.. that is how much control I have over her, then no, of course not. She does not get to question my authority. Since she has only recently deepened her submission to this level, she may ask to renegotiate the amount of authority she is comfortable with me taking at the first reasonable opportunity (i.e. in private when there is time for such negotiations - this has only happened, one time, btw, and it ended with her begging for my collar.) but at the end of that negotiation, she either chooses to submit or forget the entire arrangement completely and go back to having a vanilla marriage. As things stand, we have negotiated a dynamic that is working well. She has a fair degree of independence in making her own decisions and she knows she can temporarily surrender more authority to me as she is comfortable and I if I choose to take it I will not keep it beyond the decision she has surrendered ("Honey, do you like these earrings?".. "Not with that outfit, dearest, wear the gold hoops"...) but she will have to abide by my decision for that instance, regardless of what it is.
If she presents alternative solutions for any other goal including the well being of either one or both of us, then I cannot consider that a fight as we are working toward a mutual goal.. determining what is best solution is. I expect her to voice her concerns if she believes that the wrong course of action is being made on an important decision. I do not consider her observations or solutions to be any less mine than hers.
That being said, at the end of the discussion, it is my decision, and barring some horrible catastrophic change in myself that might impair my decision making capacity.. (which certainly puts me out of the domination game, I should think)... if either of us does not believe that I am at least as capable as she is to make the final determination on every course of action we are taking, then she needs to call an end to the whole thing (possibly meaning divorce) and either make her own decisions of find someone more capable than she is to take over.
|
|
|
|
