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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 2:42:17 PM   
suessub


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The only thing I hate about breaking out in laughter during a scene is how it breaks my ability to process the pain. Unfortunately for me, Domina has no problems continuing to cane while giggling. In fact, she down right scares me at those times.

We always take it as a good sign when we can laugh in the middle of play. Indicates we are not taking ourselves too seriously and we both are having a good time. We are not in roles we must maintain, but just expressing ourselves in our own kinky way.

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 5:27:59 PM   
Lockit


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I can only see laughter as a problem when someone is insecure and automatically thinks the laugher is 'laughing at them'.  This type of response would make me nervous and a bit afraid of the person in the sense that, there would sure be some problems of a deeper nature that I would seriously be concerned about and the defensive arguments that could ensue.  If we cannot laugh at ourselves... we have some emotional homework to do.  We can't take ourselves too seriously.

Laughing is wonderful.  Whether it bubbles up from a happy place or a nervous one... it is laughter and a release.  I laugh constantly and if it is a problem for someone... so be it... that is someone that doesn't have to be near me.  I want laughter all around me and I want everyone laughing.  Even in those romantic moments when one wouldn't think it would be good... it is!  Laugh... play and move on to the more serious and laugh again.  Life should be filled with laughter and even in the most serious of moments... laughter can lighten things without showing disrespect for the moment.

A lot of people learn as they get older, that laughter is a gift because the seriousness isn't all that it is cracked up to be.  I love the freedom of being older and knowing that sometimes you just have to laugh because there isn't much else.  We can seriously go through it all or we can laugh through it all and for me and my household... damn it, we are going to laugh!  Everything needs balance... but laughter can balance a lot of things that often bring on tears.  Cry... be serious, but laugh too.  Everything has a place.  Besides, in a scene for a lack of a better word, can bring about some sweet acted out punishments!  "You dare laugh at a moment like this?"  Whack... laugh, laugh... whack... oh yeah!

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 6:17:47 PM   
graceadieu


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Ooh, I do that nervous laughter, too.

Though I'm actually having the opposite issue - my boyfriend's new to kink, and even though he's into the idea of dominating me, he's pretty nervous and embarassed about the whole thing. So he doesn't come across as very dominant, lol. He's getting better about it, but it's still a little frustrating!

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 7:18:57 PM   
NeedingMore220


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quote:

ORIGINAL: sklavinxandria


I laugh or I start to babble.  I recently had the unfortunate remembrance of the fact that when I give a blow job, for some reason I suck in way too much air and I burp.  Talk about embarrassing and yeah for me, a mood killer from hell, don't know about the Dom though.  I did not  want to ask, and I tried really hard to hide what happened.   

And if anyone has a suggestion on a way to cure the burping, please god let me know!



Breathe through your nose, maybe? 

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 9:42:27 PM   
sklavinxandria


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From: Nebraska
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Yeah, breath  through the nose, take a break, all that.  I still burp. 

Ahh well, will just laugh it off and offer other talents, haha.


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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 9:51:06 PM   
Racquelle


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Laughing out loud is one of the great pleasures of life.  Message to the dominant: If your sub's nervous laughter offends you, it is YOUR job to A.) stop taking yourself so fucking seriously and B.) put your sub more at ease.  I love to laugh with and at my subs.  I am a clutz, so I do some unintentionally funny things during scenes, and I am big enough not get bent about a little snicker...and hell...I can always just gag 'em.

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 11:07:19 PM   
QuietPeppermint


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Even if you're in a vanilla relationship, I'm sure when there are things that make you giggle.

IE: I was once giving an ex a blowjob, and I remembered something earlier... a funny face he had made, or something like that, and I told him he looked like [something] <- I forgot, perhaps a dumpling ?

For some reason, I just started GIGGLING... I giggled so hard I couldn't continue the blowjob ! In fact, any time I looked at him I just started giggling. He got mad, and stomped off to take a shower.


The way I solved this was by thinking of something very serious [failing out of college]. I was able to sober myself. Perhaps you could try this; maybe it would help ? It may be harder in a scene when you're expected to maintain eye-contact or give something 100% of your attention, but if you can let your mind drift, let it drift to something horrible.


Good luck  !

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 11:22:51 PM   
Leatherist


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Like barney.
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVLkbfLXBcs

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/9/2008 11:31:50 PM   
ownedgirlie


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Aww what's life without laughing?  I used to feel embarrassed about things with him.  Instead of laughing, though, I would stiffen up, and get reeeeally quiet and bashful.  When I told him this was going on, he would remind me I shouldn't ever feel embarrassed about serving my Master.  That helped a lot.  I told him I always worried I would look goofy doing this or that.  He said if he ever thinks I look goofy, he would move me.  Otherwise, I'm not to worry about such things.  He helped me free my mind of feeling embarrassed - yay.

But I do laugh.  Sometimes I just start and don't stop.  Once he had me in SO much pain that I thought my mind would crack.  And I'm lying on the bed, clamped, welted, bruised, scraped, stuffed, pained...and he sits back and puts his feet up on me and makes a phone call while I was just lying there, unable to even move or cry out.  The whole situation was just so hilarious to me, when he hung up I burst out laughing and couldn't stop...um...until he gave me reason to stop. 

But nah, he doesn't get mad when I laugh.  He knows it's an emotional reaction and that I'm not laughing AT him.  That would be a much different story!

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/11/2008 5:00:12 PM   
DesFIP


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About all you can do is explain that it's caused by embarrasment, that you aren't laughing at him. If he isn't capable of believing the truth, if his self esteem is so low that this is a major problem for him then I would rethink the value of the relationship.

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/12/2008 7:40:45 PM   
Zechriel


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Joined: 11/19/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sklavinxandria


Yeah, breath  through the nose, take a break, all that.  I still burp. 

Ahh well, will just laugh it off and offer other talents, haha.



Good evening!!
  Well I just had to laugh and gods know..I know that it is not really funny but more embarrassing. 2 completely different things to me. Darling I would rather burp while pleasign Daddy than do what I do. I am multiorgasmic and tend to get very very wet. So when Daddy was playing, I kinda made that same sound but from another place on a female's body. Oh my gosh I am soo blushing even thinking about it!!!  Talk about embarrassing!!!! I was under the bedcovers so fast that Daddy was left standing by the bed with a flogger in one hand, the vibrator in the other and the look of "what the hell????" on his face no doubt. the only thing he did was poke me and say "what is this lump in the middle of my bed? Is it my baby?" Yikes-which was more embarrassing- the noise I made or the "talk" afterwards???
Okay now that I have humiliated myself...lol

Love,
Zechriel
  -Daddy's Baby Girl

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/15/2008 12:14:53 AM   
trueshadow


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I'm a guy, and I've never laughed (or God forbid, giggled).  Maybe us guys take things more seriously, or don't react to various situations by laughing out loud.  I suppose I might smile or chuckle if, for instance, she drew back her flogger to smack me, and it sailed out of her hand on the backswing, striking the wall or something.

That might indeed be pretty funny.

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RE: Embarrassment? - 7/15/2008 8:27:50 AM   
badlilthang


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Joined: 6/22/2006
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quote:

Countless times over the years DV has come to the assumption I have no interest in something, because I have never mentioned or asked for it .. but when directly questioned ... I am like "Oh my God that is sooooooooooo hot ... please can we do it 10000 times a week?"
quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

please can we do it 10000 times a week?"

wow....there are people out there as "lost and weird" as i am...*L*...thank God...i was beginning to think i was the only slave having problems begging for things for myself....phew......YAY...



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