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RE: Sub or Slave - 11/28/2005 7:45:42 PM

MasterPid

Posts: 1
Joined: 8/28/2005
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the only one that knows how to go beyond for their Master is their sub/slave...no one can tell you what will help you get ahead....you might want to do some reading...learning the positions of submission....kneeling naked legs spread palms up on knees...head bowed waiting your Masters commands....you are the only one that knows what your Master wants and expects and you are the only one that can exceed these expectations.....

(in reply to gmsangel75)

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Post #: 41

RE: Sub or Slave - 11/29/2005 12:38:08 AM

Slaveboiz

Posts: 38
Joined: 4/19/2005
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On the difference in sub/slave.

There a number of thoughts i have when someone asks that questions. First please know that my opinions are of a personal nature and comes from my own experience.

For many years there has been this idea that a bottom where someone starts out, then one progresses into being a sub and from there they transition into slavery. i couldn’t disagree more! It maybe safe to say that the differences could entail the amount of control one agrees to give another but it is more about what fits the needs of the individual which is often supported by one’s personality rather than some level of submission on strives for.

A bottom is a sexual preference, or one who likes to be at the receiving end of things such as play or sex. Their service is short term and very well defined with clear limits and expectations.

A submissive is more of a personality trait. This is a person that is comfortable allowing the dominant personality take control. This relationship dynamic can be long term and may have a number of limitations such as the amount of control the dominant personality has over the submissive personality. Submission for this person is out of the desire to do so. In other words his or her submission is fit into their lives when it is convenient or possible to do so. On that same note I have seen subs take their submissive endeavors to as deep a level of any slave I have seen.

The slave, sees their role as a need and anything less then complete surrender to the dominate personality or in this case a worthy Master, as incomplete and unfulfilling. In this type of relationship life revolves around these dynamics not the other way around. A slave may endure years of frustration and disappointment with regards to the relationships they try to fit themselves into, not knowing or realizing what they truly seek and need is slavery

In service: i see that the sub is one who is reactive to the wishes of the dominant; meaning that they must be constantly directed. They may act independently of the wishes of the master, while the slave tends to be more proactive. He or she will tend to study the Master and learn the Masters way and act dependant of the wishes of the Master. Mistress once told me "in a slave i look for someone who can make the pizza with out a lot of hand holding" She in interested in the results of the end product and it is up to the slave to make it happen.

For example: If we are traveling. i know that Mistress will want the cheapest flight possible and that she would like to arrive early to an event. So with that information i will make reservations according to those wishes. This allows Mistress to concentrate on more important areas of our lives and relationships

As we all know none is better or worst then the other. Each dynamic is for the purpose of meeting the needs of both partners. However, what I have been seeing is this need for social status within the community. It almost seems like for some folks its not ok to be a bottom or a sub but rather there is this push to be labeled as a slave. My response to that is bullocks! Be who you are. Enjoy who you are and be true to yourself and what you need.

Warm regards
slave ziggy

(in reply to gmsangel75)

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Post #: 42

RE: Sub or Slave - 11/29/2005 3:45:56 AM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
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i have tried on both suits........
the sub has more power within the relationship(imo)/limits respected ,negotiation of contract....
the slave she has only what a master gives her........whether it be crumbs or nurturing care, it depends on how pleased he is w/ her.she may be allowed a voice but he has final say on EVERYTHING.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to MasterPid)

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Post #: 43

RE: Sub or Slave - 11/29/2005 5:43:51 AM

petcerina

Posts: 143
Joined: 4/4/2005
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Submissive, lends herself to her Master, and blends as much of herself with Him as she can. The deeper the trust of the two, the deeper the submission, the stronger the union.

Slave, surrender all she is and all she will be to her Master, and accepts His love along with her place at His side. The deeper the trust of the two, the deeper the submission, the stronger the union.

This is by far the best definition i have found. i believe slaves surrender EVERY aspect of their life to their Master trusting that He will manage their life in a positive way. Slaves are able to choose who they wish to be owned by, beyond that i'm not sure what i believe. Some say that is the last choice they ever make.

The most confusing part about all of this, is that there is no hard definition of sub and slave. It has taken me a long time find a definition that works for me but this definition fits where i am right now, so this is the definition i will use. i wish you luck as you search within yourself for the answer that fits you.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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Post #: 44

RE: Sub or Slave - 1/21/2006 3:02:35 AM

subiekitty

Posts: 34
Joined: 1/15/2006
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i finaly decided to wiegh in on this. Bear in mind i am still learnign and my perspectives growing as i do.

Submissive is something one is to varying degrees. It's inherent, built in, hard wired. Submissive is something we are, not just something we do. (i beleive if its just something you do that fits the term bottom)

i feel a slave is a means of expressing when a submissive has crossed a certain line. Where they cannot refuse or turn from thier Master. It is true in our lived now, we always have a choice. Our Masters cannot actualy force us to serve or submit if we do not choose to. Often we ignore this fact, but it is there as much as we feel better by ignoring it.

If our Master forced us to accept punnishment we didn't choose to accept it would be illegal not to mention abusive but very few subs and even more rarely slaves would call it abusive. We welcome it.

i humbly sugest that one definition of a slave is when the submissive belongs to her Master fully enough that to choose to turn from there Master (though technicaly still a possible choice) would be equivilent to chooseing to starve oneself to death.

Yes you COULD do it, but its not something you'd do without some serious other issues involved. Just like one who's submission has grown deep enough to be there Masters slave, would not be able to turn from there Master without some very severe cause, if at all.

(in reply to gmsangel75)

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Post #: 45

RE: Sub or Slave - 1/21/2006 10:12:21 AM

candystripper

Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
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*sigh* This again. Though in fairness, the Op has evidentially not seen all the other threads on the subject.

What matters is the dynamic betwenn two people that makes them both happy. If they are not totally vanilla, He has some degree of control she ceded to Him. What the dynamic is or what they call themselves is personal....not subject to any BDSM committee review.

i wish you much happiness.

candystripper

(in reply to subiekitty)

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Post #: 46

RE: Sub or Slave - 1/21/2006 8:42:34 PM

ownedandcollared

Posts: 217
Joined: 1/21/2006
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There is no look for a collar...mine is a cold necklace with a lock and key charm on the end of it. Its beautiful. But its also one that i can wear without any kind of smart alecky comments and one that looks professional, for work and all. but basically, what makes a collar a collar, is that your Master gave it to you

(in reply to gmsangel75)

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Post #: 47