self-bondage, shibari and the mindset

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self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 11/14/2005 5:30:59 PM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
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earlier this evening Sir and i had a conversation about a task he had given me in re: self-bondage.
now i have no problem w/ applying rope bondage to myself,

what i seem to be experiencing is a mindset issue.

if i am the one applying the rope,

i still have the power...

therefore there is no submission

in the act of ropebondage for me

and its not as enjoyable as if it were Sir doing it to me.

now that is not to say that in the future i may like self bondage more b/c i may think of a scene or do it b/c i miss him and it feels sort of the same.........

but what i was wondering was how some of you felt about this?

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 11/14/2005 5:39:40 PM

girl4you2

Posts: 1622
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: fyreredsub

earlier this evening Sir and i had a conversation about a task he had given me in re: self-bondage.
now i have no problem w/ applying rope bondage to myself,

what i seem to be experiencing is a mindset issue.

if i am the one applying the rope,

i still have the power...

therefore there is no submission

in the act of ropebondage for me

and its not as enjoyable as if it were Sir doing it to me.

now that is not to say that in the future i may like self bondage more b/c i may think of a scene or do it b/c i miss him and it feels sort of the same.........

but what i was wondering was how some of you felt about this?

because you are being directed by your Sir to do this, whether it is as enjoyable or not is not the issue; submitting and doing as he wishes is. just be sure to use quick releasing things in there so you can get out safely.

i've put myself in restraints whenever i had the opportunity, and i sometimes have chained myself as well. i don't see this as being more dominant, as i'm not, but as needing to feel these things on me. maybe it helps to remind me of what i am.

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maireann croí éadrom i bhfad. is maith an scáthán súil charad. is leor nod don eolach.
got shoes?

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 11/14/2005 5:42:04 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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This is an excellent example of why I don't use the term "power exchange."

YOu always have the power, you just don't always exercise it. What you do is transfer authority.

You don't have the ultimate authority when you tie yourself up any more than you do when he ties you up- because both are done because HE has authorized it to happen.

You're still submitting to his desires, whether his hands are on the ropes or not.

Now, it might not be as fun for you, might not give you the same submissive squishy fuzzy feelings. But you're still submitting and obeying.

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 11/14/2005 5:47:10 PM

nephandi

Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
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Hehehe, i once tied myself up when a little girl and nearly did not get loose again, talk aboute loosing control ;) i think i was playing some superhero make belive game.

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 11/14/2005 6:00:05 PM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
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yes i understand that part of the task,lol, i even have said that it is b/c it is a task he has given me i will do it but well i enjoy having him be the one w/ the power behind the ropebut i guess if its a task.... he is,lol, something so simple yet so complicated to me.
thank you

quote:

ORIGINAL: girl4you2

quote:

ORIGINAL: fyreredsub

earlier this evening Sir and i had a conversation about a task he had given me in re: self-bondage.
now i have no problem w/ applying rope bondage to myself,

what i seem to be experiencing is a mindset issue.

if i am the one applying the rope,

i still have the power...

therefore there is no submission

in the act of ropebondage for me

and its not as enjoyable as if it were Sir doing it to me.

now that is not to say that in the future i may like self bondage more b/c i may think of a scene or do it b/c i miss him and it feels sort of the same.........

but what i was wondering was how some of you felt about this?

because you are being directed by your Sir to do this, whether it is as enjoyable or not is not the issue; submitting and doing as he wishes is. just be sure to use quick releasing things in there so you can get out safely.

i've put myself in restraints whenever i had the opportunity, and i sometimes have chained myself as well. i don't see this as being more dominant, as i'm not, but as needing to feel these things on me. maybe it helps to remind me of what i am.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to girl4you2)

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 11/14/2005 6:00:56 PM

fyreredsub

Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
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lol its the warm fuzzies that are missing

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

This is an excellent example of why I don't use the term "power exchange."

YOu always have the power, you just don't always exercise it. What you do is transfer authority.

You don't have the ultimate authority when you tie yourself up any more than you do when he ties you up- because both are done because HE has authorized it to happen.

You're still submitting to his desires, whether his hands are on the ropes or not.

Now, it might not be as fun for you, might not give you the same submissive squishy fuzzy feelings. But you're still submitting and obeying.

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 11/19/2005 11:32:21 PM

jamesthehumanrug

Posts: 668
Joined: 10/21/2005
Status: offline

fyre red,
how can you be away, from rope ,and, bondage ,in the heart,
of course you practice alone,
if i were ,without my mistress; i would have, to hang ,up side down,
AND, WAIT....

< Message edited by jamesthehumanrug -- 11/19/2005 11:33:01 PM >

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jamesthehumanrug

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 1/21/2006 2:02:24 AM

subiekitty

Posts: 34
Joined: 1/15/2006
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i know exactly what you mean about self bondage not FEELING like being in your Masters power.

Due to alot of reasons it is logisticly IMPOSIBLE right now for me to live with Master, one of the things She has me do is to hook a leash to my collar every night just as She would if we were together. The other end of course attatched to my beds headboard.

At first, i was to call when waking for permision to unleash, though now i am nolonger to do this. When i was told to stop the calls, i felt lost. It felt like i was not held so firmly in Her control.

It's hard, i agree to hold onto the concept that is still submission, when nothing stands in the way except yourself, but then theres the side that as long as you only unbind when you know Master would approve, then your still serving Masters will.

A fact i am reminded of everytime i accidently leave my bottle of Mt Dew on the computer desk when settiling in and cant go retreive it cause thats neither an emergency (in Masters view) or my time to get up in the morning (errr afternoon.....)

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 1/22/2006 12:23:25 AM

wetsub000

Posts: 91
Joined: 3/6/2005
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I think, for me at least, the fuzzies will come with time. I'm now such a rope bunny, that just feeling a length of rope, or smelling it, can send me off to fuzzy land. It wasn't always that way. I know you'll do it at first because he asks, but hopefully the fuzzies will come later.

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RE: self-bondage, shibari and the mindset - 1/23/2006 10:01:33 PM

classykindasassy

Posts: 291
Joined: 12/13/2005
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I can't explain it, but the first time I got good and tied up and played with shibari style, I felt really moved to recreate the experience the next day when I had the urge to masturbate. He had tied me up with a rope dress with crotch rope with the ropes on the outside of my labia which pressed/pinched in a most delicious way. So the next day I tied myself up the best way I could with that crotch rope doing its thing and it was great as I had my DIY fun. That dom made a point of playing me while in the process of tying me up, so I associated the process of tying with much excitement.

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