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dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 2:08:20 AM   
MasterMatmid


Posts: 8
Joined: 3/2/2008
Status: offline 		We all have a basic understanding of sub crash or drop but what of the dom?  Why is there so little talk about dom drop?  What is the after care for a dom who drops and by whom?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 2:12:51 AM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		Dom Drop can kill ... it effects DV particularly badly .. only known cure is a heavy application of baked goods and blow jobs, often beating a pile of girls will lift the spirits, or generally just having His every whim catered to.
Joking aside
I was discussing this with a friend last week .. he suffers from Top Drop .. and often all he needs is to just sit and be peaceful with someone. Treat it just like you would sub drop ... do what the person needs .. how they need it done. Its the same group of reactions and processes as for a sub, just perhaps manifesting itself slightly differently.



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RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 2:53:42 AM   
angaothsi


Posts: 242
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline 		PATIENCE!!!
That is the best thing. He ( or She) doesnt need a bratty pushy subbie asking/begging/pleading/demanding/whining or any other such nonesense. They need space and time to deal with whatever issues they have on their own, in their own way.

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RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 3:37:10 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		Just curious, I wonder what the average time frame is for the onset of dom drop and the average length of time it lasts?

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RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 4:57:32 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		I think it is more common for submissives NOT to submit to the vanilla world around them than for a dominant NOT to dominate the world around them.  Therefore it is a radical change between the submission in a scene and the lack of submission in a some submissives’ daily life. 

I dominate the world around me.  I run my own business, I Dom the girl at the 7-11, the clerks at grocery store and people I meet in general.  So I don’t really get Dom drop very much, I am always in Dom mode.  The difference between doing a scene and what occurs in my daily life is mentally and emotionally the same minus a single piece of leather called a whip.  And even in office there used to be a whip hanging on the wall and it was called “ the employee incentive of program.”

That’s pretty much it.  I’m don’t think submissives submit to strangers as often as dominant dominate the world around them.  Less Dom drop than sub drop.

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RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 6:41:59 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Honestly anything that has been said about subdrop can apply to topdrop. 

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1702723/mpage_1/key_dom%252Cdrop/tm.htm#1704904
What is dom drop?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_883031/mpage_1/key_top%252Cdrop/tm.htm#883388
TopDrop/subdrop and Aftercare

http://www.collarchat.com/m_772983/mpage_1/key_aftercare/tm.htm#773055
how much is "too much" aftercare?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_725006/mpage_1/key_aftercare/tm.htm#725011
aftercare, the top side?



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RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 4:49:54 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I'm much more likely to suffer sub drop than he is to suffer top drop. In fact the only time I can remember him getting this was the result of a long, heavy play session lasting 16 hours followed by us immediately parting.

Me, I don't recharge nearly that quick. You give him a decent meal afterwards, and he bounces right back. I'm the one shivering uncontrollably and desperate to dive into sleep. I don't take a lot of fussing, but what I do need, I must have. Moreover he can drive a car after play and I can't.

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RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 5:38:28 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

.  Therefore it is a radical change between the submission in a scene and the lack of submission in a some submissives’ daily life.  

I’m don’t think submissives submit to strangers as often as dominant dominate the world around them. 


I don't know about that.  In the time that the subbie is not caring for his/her dominant, others take that role in some ways, at least for me.  I am a nuturer by nature, therefore I am constantly serving the needs of those around me as naturally as a dominant may direct others to meet his/her needs.  The difference is still just the little piece of leather, but it is how it is being physically used and the other processes going on within the subbie phyiscally, mentally, and emotionally brought on in the course of the blows.

I don't think it is that domdrop isn't unusual, but that it is different and often a hidden thing.  The subbie is in such a state that it is not always proper to reveal needing a lot of petting at that time.  One of the few exceptions being when a scene had gone badly in such a way that the subbie is not in need of too much help, but the dominant feels terrible about it.  There may be other times, but this one glares out to me due to another thread recently.

As far as the more everyday case, I receive soothing when the roles flip due to aftercare.  Taking care of subbie however is best for him/her is my way of bringing things back to center.  Maybe that is just the switch talking, but I really enjoy caring for the one who just gave all for me. Just my opinion and my experiences, limited as they may be.

Regards,
lovingpet  

 

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 7:53:15 PM   
firefey


Posts: 144
Joined: 1/25/2005
Status: offline 		i think it depends on what kind of top drop one is having.  the one and only time i have had the experience it was more of a what did i do, omg i've harmed him, i'm sicksicksick badbadbadbadbad.  in that moment, if no one else is there, it is the subs responsibility to let the dom/me know they are ok.  or the top needs to get a hold of someone who can.

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 8:05:33 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		Agreed... Attentiveness from both to some degree help both to land safely.  Sometimes the dom may have to swallow the pill of waiting for that reassurance if subbie is far out in subspace though, or attend to it with a friend.

lovingpet

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Profile   Post #: 10
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/24/2008 9:01:06 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		caffienne,lots and lots of caffienne


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Profile   Post #: 11
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/25/2008 4:44:23 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		I do not expect my Master to care for me after play, i entirely enjoy caring for Him after play.  It is my opportunity to display my gratitude for all that He gave me during our play session.  i'm not at all sure if it has anything whatsoever to do with the fact that i never experience 'subspace'.

It's important that i look for clues to what He might need.  He may need for me to not touch Him at all but to lie quietly by His side. He will most likely want coffee and a cigarette, so i can have those close at hand for Him.  He may need a cool cloth to wipe Him down or my body to warm Him up.  Whatever He may need to recover from the level of energy He has expended, i will supply.  i'm not sure if that is considered Dom drop or not.

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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/25/2008 4:13:50 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Oh and it isn't a headspace thing for me, it's physical. I can avoid a lot of it by being careful beforehand but since we frequently can't plan play time, I'm not always fully prepared.

If I have been running around for hours and haven't eaten I will pay for it.
If I didn't sleep well the previous night then I will drop.
If I'm dehydrated to begin with, well you get the picture.

But the biggest difference between us is that I'm the one immobilized and his blood's still circulating. He takes a sip of water from the glasses I bring in ahead of time as he needs it. I have to wait until after. I'm more susceptible to low blood sugar than he is, more susceptible to lack of sleep. He drops only if his physical needs are compromised to a much greater extent than I can handle. Physically he's a lot tougher than I am.

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/26/2008 7:56:06 AM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

I do not expect my Master to care for me after play, i entirely enjoy caring for Him after play.  It is my opportunity to display my gratitude for all that He gave me during our play session.  i'm not at all sure if it has anything whatsoever to do with the fact that i never experience 'subspace'.

I'm similar, I find "aftercare" type comfort in being close/held, but, at the same time, if that's not what the dom/me needs, then that's not what happpens.

I have a tendency to lose co-ordination (I'm unco-ordinated at the best of time, but it gets worse post play) so wandering about/driving/cooking is a bad idea, but I can still use basic relaxation/hypnosis techniques which make for nice floaty after-time, assuming the person I'm with likes that.

Sometimes responding to the "are you okay" question with, "yes, are you?" is enough.

(in reply to eyesopened)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/27/2008 1:11:43 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I really don't think there's been "little" on the subject of top drop.  Those few links that LA gave aren't nearly the beginning.  I came up with quite a few listings when searching the term Top drop.  

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: dom drop or crash - 7/28/2008 9:05:46 AM   
DMFParadox


Posts: 1405
Joined: 9/11/2007
Status: offline 		The idea that it's the separation between normal-state and your D/s role that causes drop is eye opening for me.

That's a good reason for reading this thread.

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Profile   Post #: 16
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