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what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 8:37:13 AM

aries4u2own

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What are you looking for in an introduction letter?

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 8:55:49 AM

Madame4a

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
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here is one of several threads that might help you

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1045008/mpage_1/tm.htm

or not.. my point is, a search will reveal some information for you

< Message edited by Madame4a -- 7/29/2008 8:57:00 AM >

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 9:54:14 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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When you say an introduction letter, I'm going to go with the thought that you are wanting to contact folks you are interested in for reasons other than friendship. I'm stating that because, in My view, that actually does make a difference.

The common courtesy of addressing Me by using My screen name. Don't call Me Goddess, Your Highness, or any other silly thing that you chose to place on Me.

Make some mention that shows Me that you really have read My profile, preferably something that is not kink or sexually related.

Talk to Me like I'm a person, and not life support for a whip.

Tell Me why you are contacting Me, rather than a thousand other Dominants on this site.

Good spelling and grammer. I don't expect you to be perfect, but use spell check.

Keep the length within reason. There's no need for your life story in an introductory email.

Not that difficult, really. There are quite a few submissives that can tell you that the above works well.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Madame4a)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 10:43:51 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

When you say an introduction letter, I'm going to go with the thought that you are wanting to contact folks you are interested in for reasons other than friendship. I'm stating that because, in My view, that actually does make a difference.

The common courtesy of addressing Me by using My screen name. Don't call Me Goddess, Your Highness, or any other silly thing that you chose to place on Me.

Make some mention that shows Me that you really have read My profile, preferably something that is not kink or sexually related.

Talk to Me like I'm a person, and not life support for a whip.

Tell Me why you are contacting Me, rather than a thousand other Dominants on this site.

Good spelling and grammer. I don't expect you to be perfect, but use spell check.

Keep the length within reason. There's no need for your life story in an introductory email.

Not that difficult, really. There are quite a few submissives that can tell you that the above works well.

what Lady Pact said but i would like to add one more - don't propose marriage or say the following: you're the one i've been searching for my whole, entire life ...i will do anything to be your foot slave (or whatever you want to be to her) ...i'm a no-limits slave ...let me prove this ...collar me, my Mistress...

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 12:07:52 PM

CallaFirestormBW

Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
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I thought I'd reply to this... It's hard to say what I'm looking for, see -- most of the people who write me and tell me that they'll be dedicated to me until their dying breath really don't have any idea... What I most want to know about is what you are as a person, and how that -person- is going to fit into my life as a domina and into my current relationship with my Darling... and how well you're going to fit into a future -- 30 years is a long time if you can't stand the person you're with.

Sometimes, I'm looking to see if someone is interested in the same things as I am and is close enough that we might be able to get together for some play.

I answered a letter the other day that started out as a one-liner... but the guy had a great sense of humor (expressed in that one line) and that made me write him back, even though he's -way- too far away to fit under my boot, unless I got -really- high heels!

I think what I'm looking for is a personality behind all the hype. I don't need wank material -- If you genuinely think you can meet my needs, I definitely want to know it... and if you just want to converse, I'm fine with that, too -- just have something interesting to talk about. If you have questions, I'm usually good about answering them, where I can, and finding out the answers if I don't know...

"Hi Mistress" isn't going to do anything for me -- if you want a conversation, give me something to talk about!

Calla Firestorm

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Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

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(in reply to aries4u2own)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 4:12:44 PM

aries4u2own

Posts: 7
Joined: 12/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Madame4a

here is one of several threads that might help you

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1045008/mpage_1/tm.htm

or not.. my point is, a search will reveal some information for you

well that was very funny and needed a good laugh thanks

(in reply to Madame4a)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 4:15:35 PM

aries4u2own

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Thanks for every ones imput.....

be in good health,

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/29/2008 7:10:32 PM

MysticFireTopaz

Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
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I clearly spell out in my profile what I am looking for in an introductory letter:

Age
Location
Marital Status
Experience in the lifestyle
Occupation/education level
What the sub is seeking in a relationship

When the sub includes that information, he proves that he has read my profile and is respecting my wishes.

Beyond that, I look for a polite tone and reasonably good spelling and grammar.

Any introductory letters in "text speak" get deleted immediately with no response. For example, I recently got one saying, "I am all that u r looking 4. Would u consider me?" Likewise, obvious form letters get deleted. In addition, any introductory letters that are explicitly sexual or have a list of things the sub wants done to him get deleted as well.

Lady Topaz

(in reply to aries4u2own)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/30/2008 4:45:56 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
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LadyPack I would contact you because you are cute. The other 999 are ugly. Ok mabey a couple of them arent.

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/30/2008 6:03:07 AM

MsStarlett

Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
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As mentioned on the "Inundated" thread... I look for someone who actually sounds like they took the time to read part of my profile instead of stopping at "Cute Ass."

Now, I don't mind those odd little compliments from those who are 'just passing by'. I actually enjoy them and I do it also. I've written little one liners to hot guys that I'm not really interested in... I just enjoyed their photos popping up on my Home Page. It's just a really good way to start a relationship.

_____________________________

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It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 7/30/2008 6:19:42 AM

thishereboi

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Some indication that they have actually read my profile would be nice.

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This here is the boi formerly known as orfunboi

(in reply to aries4u2own)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/2/2008 3:07:52 PM

aries4u2own

Posts: 7
Joined: 12/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MysticFireTopaz

I clearly spell out in my profile what I am looking for in an introductory letter:

Age

Location

Marital Status

Experience in the lifestyle

Occupation/education level

What the sub is seeking in a relationship

When the sub includes that information, he proves that he has read my profile and is respecting my wishes.

Beyond that, I look for a polite tone and reasonably good spelling and grammar.

Any introductory letters in "text speak" get deleted immediately with no response. For example, I recently got one saying, "I am all that u r looking 4. Would u consider me?" Likewise, obvious form letters get deleted. In addition, any introductory letters that are explicitly sexual or have a list of things the sub wants done to him get deleted as well.

Lady Topaz

Lady Topas,

Thank you for your imput,

i feel that this is all good information ,but still leaves me puzzled on how to give all that standard information and stand out heck i have a peronality and don't want to be blah. guess i should have taken a creative writing class in school.

thanks, aries4u2own

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/2/2008 3:24:35 PM

MysticFireTopaz

Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: aries4u2own

quote:

ORIGINAL: MysticFireTopaz

I clearly spell out in my profile what I am looking for in an introductory letter:

Age

Location

Marital Status

Experience in the lifestyle

Occupation/education level

What the sub is seeking in a relationship

When the sub includes that information, he proves that he has read my profile and is respecting my wishes.

Beyond that, I look for a polite tone and reasonably good spelling and grammar.

Any introductory letters in "text speak" get deleted immediately with no response. For example, I recently got one saying, "I am all that u r looking 4. Would u consider me?" Likewise, obvious form letters get deleted. In addition, any introductory letters that are explicitly sexual or have a list of things the sub wants done to him get deleted as well.

Lady Topaz

Lady Topas,

Thank you for your imput,

i feel that this is all good information ,but still leaves me puzzled on how to give all that standard information and stand out heck i have a peronality and don't want to be blah. guess i should have taken a creative writing class in school.

thanks, aries4u2own

aries,

Believe me, if you did nothing more than include the information I request, you would stand out from the crowd. Only about 10% of the responses I receive contain what I request (probably about the same percentage read profiles).

I have gotten responses from subs who were creative and wove the information into an interesting bio of themselves. I did get a sense of their personality, while they gave me the information I was looking for.

Lady Topaz

(in reply to aries4u2own)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/3/2008 5:39:24 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

LadyPack I would contact you because you are cute. The other 999 are ugly. Ok mabey a couple of them arent.

Cute, Ray. Actually, you'd be surprised at how many folks, who don't see the name spelled out, think it is "Lady Pack".

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Dnomyar)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/3/2008 10:09:04 AM

sillyslaveboy

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Joined: 7/28/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar
LadyPack I would contact you because you are cute. The other 999 are ugly. Ok mabey a couple of them arent.

Cute, Ray. Actually, you'd be surprised at how many folks, who don't see the name spelled out, think it is "Lady Pack".

Believe it or not, i was asking myself will You reply on that one, Lady Pact. :)

(in reply to LadyPact)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/4/2008 12:41:21 PM

Najakcharmer

Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aries4u2own
What are you looking for in an introduction letter?

1. No sleaze. If we have not been introduced, sticking your dick in my face or telling me about your sexual/kinky desires will make me delete and block you. If you're really sleazy and your spelling sucks, I may even copy your message (minus any identifying details, I'm not THAT mean) to a BDSM snark community so everyone can laugh at you. Said post may include a Photoshopped macro of your dick if you sent a picture. If you don't want the lolcat crowd making fun of your weiner, don't send it to random strangers on the Internet, especially when they tell you they don't want any.

2. Decent grammar and spelling. If English is not your first language I'm willing to cut a lot of slack, but if not, there is no excuse for writing like a dyslexic third grader on phentermine. Unless you are dyslexic, but I certainly hope you are not a third grader. See #1 for what will happen to your email if you send me something hilariously illiterate.

3. Talk like a normal adult human being, and treat *me* like a normal adult human being. Lame capitalization, weird titles and other overt D/s or kinky roleplaying is not welcome, and will probably put your entry directly into the snark barrel. You would have known that if you had actually read my profile.

4. Read my profile. Actually read it, don't just look at the picture. Demonstrate in your email that you have read it by approaching me in the way I request, in a friendly and conversational manner about vanilla topics of mutual common interest. If you honestly don't care about anything I have to say or what I might want, why in the world are you writing me? Oh right - you just want wank fodder and you really don't give two shits what I want. Bzzzzt. One more for the snark barrel.

< Message edited by Najakcharmer -- 8/4/2008 12:42:54 PM >

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/5/2008 9:30:07 PM

MistressTaboo

Posts: 147
Joined: 6/10/2005
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2. Decent grammar and spelling. If English is not your first language I'm willing to cut a lot of slack, but if not, there is no excuse for writing like a dyslexic third grader on phentermine. Unless you are dyslexic, but I certainly hope you are not a third grader. See #1 for what will happen to your email if you send me something hilariously illiterate.

hey now I'm dyslexic (and who was the sick Freak who came up with that name for people who can't spell?) But I use a spell checker...and silly me thinks if I can do it so can they! Spelling and grammar is a must!

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/5/2008 10:18:01 PM

blackrosegoddess

Posts: 25
Joined: 6/19/2008
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I look for:
*Location and willingness to travel to MY location ( which changes at random).
* Something that shows you have read and understood what my profile says ( some questions maybe about what certain aspects of it mean to me maybe.)
* Spelling and grammar. No one is perfect, but try to make things make sense please.
* Nothing vulgar or smutt related please. Serious notes/emails only. Eg: I think you would look wonderful mounted on my dick. ( Yep, I actually had someone email me that exact phrase.)
* Creativity: Don't just tell me the everyday things ( What your fetishes are, where you grew up) I want something that makes me go " Yeah, I get it." I want to get a sense of who you are. Eg: I am ____ from Boise. I love the theatre and tend to be a very opinionated movie/theatre critic. What I look for in a production is: ____________. I find that sometimes movie mood-music can distract, rather than enhance a movie scene. Take X song from Y movie. Now, that was a wonderfully done scene. DON’T MAKE ME HAVE TO ASK FOR INFORMATION! Eg: Hobbies, favorite movies/books/bands/singers/ tv shows. The more you supply
* Stop trying to bate me with :" I think your beautiful" or "I know you are probably told this all the time, but you are very lovely". Why? Because I know what I am and how others may see me. I don't need to hear it OVER AND OVER. It doesn’t grab my attention and it gets boring. I don’t do boring.
* Be specific: If I read everyone’s profile that sent me a message, I would never leave the computer! ( Especially when a lot of you have more than a few fetishes and ideas about what you would like to try). So, tell me what you like, how long you have been doing it, what makes you think you might want to try something and what your limits are.
* Don’t play games. I don’t do coy. Be straight with me and I will be straight with you.
* Make sure you remember that I am human first, and a dominatrix second. So, all the usual human interaction rules apply. EG: Show respect, get respect. Build trust. Mind your manners. Don’t expect me to cross boundaries on my personal Taboo scale, and I wont cross yours either. Be courteous ( If you cant make a date, call, email, text, because I don’t like to be stood up!)

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/6/2008 1:05:34 PM

Slavesun

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Joined: 6/29/2008
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I'm not successful, hung like a horse, good looking and stupid...nor do I have a fat wallet therefore it doesn't matter what I include in my introduction.

Not meaning to offend anybody but that is the collective impression I got from reading a stack of Domme profiles.

They expect you to jump through hoops and offer little in return. If I had the personal qualities and attributes they are collectively seeking I'd be chasing the stunning supermodel type rather than waste time grovelling to middle aged women with average looks.

Pro Dommes are a better option....you get exactly what you want, odds are stacked in favor of the fact that they know what they are doing and how to use equipment safely plus you avoid the possibility of finding yourself in the hands of a psycho Domme (they are out there from what I've been told.)

For the sake of the excercise, I tend to look for:

*Good reputation
*BDSM Interests
*Skills and experience
*Contact details/Dungeon location
*A picture

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RE: what are you looking for in an introduction letter - 8/6/2008 1:31:30 PM

TwoNYCDommes

Posts: 237
Joined: 1/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thishereboi
Some indication that they have actually read my profile would be nice.

Yes, that's probably the most important thing to us. That they've read our profile, share common interests, and can discuss them with some degree of eloquence.

(in reply to thishereboi)

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