RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (Full Version)

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SimplyMichael -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 11:53:25 AM)

quote:

It's those lingering issues that get "talked" about over and over but then never really addressed that are on the subtly dramatic side.  Subtle drama is to me when something comes up and you say to yourself...."Not this again....I thought we have dealt with this and put it to bed already"


Bingo!

Drama is "why does this ALWAYS happen to ME" over and over and over and over and over again...




BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 12:20:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddyLongStroke

Why is it that at times you pretend to not understand what I am saying?  I am not saying your friends are drama queens.  I am not saying you don't try to distance yourself.  As for the last question....well....I'd rather not have the stenographer go back and read us what has happened so far.  You absoluely have been known to create drama (we all have). 

A, B, C....Sorry, got a little sidetracked there....But I digress

Just because you felt justified in your reactions doesn't mean that it wasn't drama. 

While I agree with you that just because it might not be in the middle of a firery outburst it may tend to resemble more of life's "issues"  but there are plenty of times (in general) that a "routine" problem drags on and on and on because the person loves the attention.  I am not saying that every "problem" in life is dramatic.  You deal with it and move on.  It's those lingering issues that get "talked" about over and over but then never really addressed that are on the subtly dramatic side.  Subtle drama is to me when something comes up and you say to yourself...."Not this again....I thought we have dealt with this and put it to bed already"

don't you think that making a post like this but then texting me that you were only kidding around is creating drama?
perhaps I should have put the qualifier in there that I tend to flip out and get dramatic when i'm being lied to by someone i'm involved with?




everhope -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 12:21:59 PM)

i see and feel life through passionate sensors and passion can take on the taste of drama in my world. i lick it all up with playful interest. if there are personal happenings of the dramatic kind in my life, i will retreat  and only those i trust with my most vulnerable feelings will hear a peep out of me.
 
there are drama Kings too. let's not be sexist when it comes to drama.

may we all find our dramatic bliss.




eyesopened -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 12:27:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Drama does exist in life, it's all around us.  It's how we deal with it that matters, not the drama itself.  You cannot escape it or control it, but you can own it and calm it.
 
I would liken it to television.  On that box, you can flip channels and see all types of drama.  Jerry Springer re-runs, the news, Pride and Prejudice, CSI, .  But you choose the drama that you watch that entertains you or that makes you cry, laugh, smile or just be plain angry.
 
Life is drama - but you play it out and let it effect you how you wish and act accordingly.
 
the.dark.

 
The term 'drama' has come to mean making mountains out of molehills and making the normal ups and downs of life bigger than they are.  But life without ups and downs would be boring.  I want to feel a full range of emotion, its a part of living.  The.dark is absolutely correct, it is how one deals with these things that matters.  Some things are within our control and others are not but always, always, happiness is a choice.




TysGalilah -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 1:20:53 PM)

chaos creates upheaval ,   upheaval brings attention....and, for some, even negative attention is better than being or existing quietly within themselves and without the reaffirming outward attention from others ( that they need ).
 
drama junkies need chaos around them to feel relevant.
they feel invisible, unless someone elses drama/chaos is bouncing off of them too, illuminating their existence.
 
 as though>
If I am not hurting or in trouble, having hardship and problems, then how will I matter to others?? and if I no longer matter to others then  I no longer matter ...I may become insignificant.
 
 edited to add:

and I agree, happiness is a choice we make.
perhaps people who need chaos are not able to choose?
fear or some other dysfunction keeps them from making their own choices, even to be happy.  and so someone elses drama makes their choices for them.  ??

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 




CrazyC -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 1:30:13 PM)

Dealing with people on a daily life with my job and communities, I come in contact with those who thrive on drama. I don't have a choice to ignore them. I do have a choice to leave them with a little hope. They can either take it and mull over it, or they can ignore it. And do I let their drama effect me, no. I would hate to think i can't talk to one of my friends, because they have shit going on in thier lives. Now do I let that shit effect how i live the rest of my day...no.

Personally, I know life isn't easy, but i also choose everyday to live knowing there are good things happening. To search for those happy moments, and if they aren't happening...damn it....I make one happen.




Maxwell67 -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 1:36:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TysGalilah
chaos creates upheaval ,   upheaval brings attention....and, for some, even negative attention is better than being or existing quietly within themselves and without the reaffirming outward attention from others ( that they need ).
 
drama junkies need chaos around them to feel relevant.
they feel invisible, unless someone elses drama/chaos is bouncing off of them too, illuminating their existence.
 
 as though>
If I am not hurting or in trouble, having hardship and problems, then how will I matter to others?? and if I no longer matter to others then  I no longer matter ...I may become insignificant.
 
 edited to add:

and I agree, happiness is a choice we make.
perhaps people who need chaos are not able to choose?
fear or some other dysfunction keeps them from making their own choices, even to be happy.  and so someone elses drama makes their choices for them.  ??

Hmmm.  I deal with other peoples drama daily.  I simply have no fear that someone elses problem will, in turn, encapsulate me as well.  Sometimes I come across someone who tries, but generally if you are observant you can see it coming a long way off and avoid the trap.  'Drama junkies' are a lot like any other bratty type.  They just don't realize how silly and unproductive their tactics are.  A little patience and effort showing them that and teaching them new and better tactics often pays off.  Of course, sometimes it doesn't, and then it is time to put some distance bewteen you and the attention leech before they get so attached you have to cut off an appendage to get rid of them.




NuevaVida -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 1:41:36 PM)

Ahh what a timely thread. Yes, the world is full of drama. How we choose to respond to it, however, can be "dramatic" or not. Sure, I watch TV and movies, but I don't live them. They are merely an entertaining distraction to enjoy.

I have made it a point in my recent history to not get sucked into the drama of others, and to try not to create drama of my own. Usually I succeed at it. Sometimes I don't. But I want to be the kind of person who contributes positive energy to the world, rather than draining others around me, and I have learned to create healthy boundaries of my own to open myself more to positive people, and less to the negative ones.

All we really have is time. Why waste it?


Edited to add, for some reason CM isn't posting my signature line: "Formerly known as ownedgirlie"




SimplyMichael -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 2:13:08 PM)

quote:

I cannot tell you how many times Michael has told me, "Holy shit, you really ARE drama free."  It sometimes freaks him out.. lol


Sad but true!  You really ARE drama free and for the first time in my life I see that little ole me needs just a touch of it in my life in order to feel things are on a steady keel.  However, I think that is because of the distance between us and the lack of daily contact.  Nothing like waking up next to someone to let you know everything is going well.




TysGalilah -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 3:47:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

quote:

I cannot tell you how many times Michael has told me, "Holy shit, you really ARE drama free."  It sometimes freaks him out.. lol


Sad but true!  You really ARE drama free and for the first time in my life I see that little ole me needs just a touch of it in my life in order to feel things are on a steady keel.  However, I think that is because of the distance between us and the lack of daily contact.  Nothing like waking up next to someone to let you know everything is going well.

 
I can certainly relate...and agree
 LDR are a completely different kind of animal to deal with and so bring with them some different actions and reactions...maybe even rules.  I personally do not think of those extra needs as drama on my part.. just my opinion tho'...
 
 




Prinsexx -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 3:50:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

quote:

It's those lingering issues that get "talked" about over and over but then never really addressed that are on the subtly dramatic side.  Subtle drama is to me when something comes up and you say to yourself...."Not this again....I thought we have dealt with this and put it to bed already"


Bingo!

Drama is "why does this ALWAYS happen to ME" over and over and over and over and over again...

maybe you prefer a long time flatlining?




SimplyMichael -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 3:56:37 PM)

No, I just can't stand idiots who repeat the same pattern over and over and over and who always blame someone else and just can't manage to look in the mirror of self reflection and see their own role in that drama because actually becoming healthy is just to damn much work for them.




camille65 -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 3:57:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

<snipped>
How much of your life is personally dramatic?
How much of your life is spent watching it unfold on tele, or in a virtual reality or even (here goes) spent getting off on porn?
Are there real manners, real protocols out there in existence that distinguishes between drama and life?
What's the price of the ticket?




None of my life is personally dramatic, life = things happening. Otherwise life would be stagnant and pointless.

None of my life is spent watching it unfold on television (that makes no sense to me since there hasn't yet been a Camille Reality Show), or in a virtual reality. But some of my time is spent watching tv or being online. Very little of that time is about me, instead it is about relaxing and being entertained. Sometimes it is a form of learning.

How much of my life is spent getting off on porn? Thats another question that I don't really get, I don't consider the stuff inside of my head to be porn. Its sexual, delicious and again something I think is perfectly normal.

What do manners have to do with drama? My life doesn't involve a set of protocols.

The price of the ticket is whatever you are willing to pay.
I take credit cards, cash and paypal. Oh, and I happily take Amazon gift cards as payment.


The impression I get from the majority of your posts is that you spend an awful lot of time trying to complicate things so that you can make them different from other peoples experiences.




lally3 -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 4:08:36 PM)

i guy asked me once if i imagined my life being played out to an immaginary audience behind an invisible camera...?? - he was honestly surprised when i said 'no' in a baffled tone.  he was a drama queen and i realised after a time that this was how he lived his life.  playing to an invisible audience the whole sodding time.

people are afraid of becoming invisible.  a g/f of mine said how she wasnt coping with turning 40 and suddenly becoming invisible to the up and coming uber fertile generation she once belonged to.

taking part in the drama of life is maybe about having a role.  for the guy his role was, well, god knows - to entertain a world no longer entertained by him, so he created his own audience.  my friend isnt sure what her role is anymore, but she amounts to much more than something scenic and she always has in my view, but thats where shes at right now.

we take part in a world that gives credance to impossible goals of mega wealth and a size 0 in fashion.  if youre not beautiful, rich and famous then you may just as well put a bag over your head and join the vast majority.

there is so much else that is so incredibly important going on in this incredible planet of ours and yet the dramas that unfold amongst us are unbelievably myopic and pointless.  who gives a shit that jordan has huge tits and legs that have taken on the appearance of a 70 year old, who gives a damn that angelina joli is so skinny she could fall through a crack in the pavement...

erm, might have lost the point of the thread here...... giggle.... anyhoo, drama shlama - who needs em!





silkncarol -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 4:13:02 PM)

I totally agree with you......sometimes life spins out of control and the only control you may have is your own attitude and how you choose to face it....


quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

The term 'drama' has come to mean making mountains out of molehills and making the normal ups and downs of life bigger than they are.  But life without ups and downs would be boring.  I want to feel a full range of emotion, its a part of living.  The.dark is absolutely correct, it is how one deals with these things that matters.  Some things are within our control and others are not but always, always, happiness is a choice.




BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 4:20:47 PM)

Feeling the need to restate my earlier post which was sort of a knee jerk reaction. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddyLongStroke

Why is it that at times you pretend to not understand what I am saying? 
Because I don't understand what you are saying. I don't feel the need to pretend. Seriously.
I am not saying your friends are drama queens.  I am not saying you don't try to distance yourself.  As for the last question....well....I'd rather not have the stenographer go back and read us what has happened so far.  You absoluely have been known to create drama (we all have). 

A, B, C....Sorry, got a little sidetracked there....But I digress
OK. No matter how good we communicate these days, you can't bring up what is definitely a "hot button" issue for me  which, by  your own admission, you purposely goaded and poked me time and time again, and expect me not to react negatively.  Yes you did apologize for that past behavior, but you can't reopen the wound and then get surprised when it bleeds.

Just because you felt justified in your reactions doesn't mean that it wasn't drama. 
I wholeheartedly agree.  Don't see where I ever said that though.

While I agree with you that just because it might not be in the middle of a firery outburst it may tend to resemble more of life's "issues"  but there are plenty of times (in general) that a "routine" problem drags on and on and on because the person loves the attention.  I am not saying that every "problem" in life is dramatic.  You deal with it and move on.  It's those lingering issues that get "talked" about over and over but then never really addressed that are on the subtly dramatic side.  Subtle drama is to me when something comes up and you say to yourself...."Not this again....I thought we have dealt with this and put it to bed already"
Yes.  What exactly did you think I was referring to when I said  "I am somewhat stuck with the incredible amounts of drama created by my Father and my sister..."

A revision of my earlier responses:

don't you think that making a post like this but then texting me that you were only kidding around is creating drama?
I apologize for getting it wrong.  The text you sent me actually said you were just being playful and the post you made wasn't bad.. Do you not see that IN MY PERCEPTION, it's rather two faced of you to you make sarcstic and somewhat inflamatory remarks to me in public but pat my head in private and tell me, "You know I didn't mean in THAT way.  Don't take things so personally,"  For the entire length of time we have known each other, I have been fairly consistant in my reactions to your brand of sarcasm (or as you call it, humor).  So why you always seem surprised when I react in a negative way to it?  There is a name for doing the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result... 
 perhaps I should have put the qualifier in there that I tend to flip out and get dramatic when i'm being lied to by someone i'm involved with?
Those are the times that I have flipped out and gone psycho-bitch on you.. It's drama, but not ongoing drama. If you don't lie,  I don't flip out.  This by no means makes me a drama queen though..  Michael hasn't seen drama from me because he has never lied to me.  Not a difficult concept to embrace, is it? 
 

I only post this to clarify my position on the subject.  I'm not upset anymore and hope you aren't. I still love you.[;)]




stella41b -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 5:45:02 PM)

Hmm let's see.. How about things that go to make up a life, okay?

So how about administration? No, that's a bad word, so let's substitute it for 'management', right that's better, 'life management' - getting the income, paying the bills, living someplace, having the right structure and organization in your life, to be able to deal with other people, and also... deal with yourself. Then you have awareness, where you are going in life, what you're doing, who you're dealing with, when, why and so on. Then you have communication, because there are other people in your life, family, friends, co-workers, and so on. Then you need confidence, that feeling of security, knowledge that everything is okay, that everything is in place and as it should be. If something's not right, then you can change it until it is right.

Then there's creativity, moving forward, moving on, finding solutions to problems and difficult situations. This would appear necessary if you're seeking any sort of progress, development, or hoping to achieve something. The next thing I feel that goes to make up a life is discipline - that commitment to yourself, to others in your life, to the way you're living, your ideas, feelings, relationships, goals, dreams.. Finally you also need to be living, out there, in life, on the streets, among people.

Seven things which go to make up a life, management, awareness, communication, confidence, creativity, discipline and living. Now you can debate this among yourselves no doubt, but aren't these the same principles you would need when you approach BDSM, D/s and a relationship with such a dynamic? Or even as it were, a normal, bog standard, vanilla relationship.

But these are also the seven core principles of the Stanislavski Method of acting. And you know, when some people talk about drama as if it's a bad thing I sometimes have to scratch my head and wonder. Now let's assume I'm a Martian, I'm small, green, have just arrived onto Planet Earth in a silver spaceship looking for signs of intelligent life. Intelligent life? Hmm, humans. I follow them into a theatre and I watch them all sit down neatly into rows. They are all looking at an empty space (actually the stage). So what? So humans come together to sit and stare into open spaces? But no wait, the lights go out. That empty space lights up and other human beings come out and enact a scene by pretending to be other human beings in another situation. All the other humans are sat there in their rows watching these humans pretending to be other humans. Is this why they've come? Yes it is.

Meanwhile in movie theaters you got other humans sat in rows, munching popcorn watching a recording of other humans on a screen pretending to be other humans. Meanwhile in millions of homes all over the world other humans are staring at a plastic box on which there's another screen on which there are more humans, pretending to be other humans. Drama is life, and life is drama, with episodes of drama, horror, suspense, thriller, tragedy, and comedy thrown in. Nothing good is going to happen in your life without drama. Nothing.

So what about those previously who claim to be drama-free? Does this mean they live in a broom cupboard? No it doesn't. They're not really talking about drama, but about melodrama - sensational drama, the stuff that grips the emotions and causes stress. The point focus or mid-point in the three stage Hollywood script format - the crisis, 'there's no way out', 'we're doomed', 'I'm doomed'. This is the drama of daytime TV, cheap lurid South American soap operas, played out in real life by people who are only successful at playing caricatures of themselves. You know, when you've got a representative group of middle America trapped in a small town Walmart and the only exits are covered by nasty horrible beings or things which are 'out to get them'.

These are not just drama queens, for drama queens are easy to deal with, just avoid them. But then you get the prima donnas, both male and female, very much in the tradition of 19th century Russian theatre, the very people who inspired the Russian actor Constantin Stanislavski to write down his method. I don't mind dealing with drama, other people's drama but I know very few drama queens. I admit that I take the piss at times, but I've watched too much Leslie Neilsen and Lloyd Bridges to always pass up the temptation.

My approach to life is the same as theatre, deal with the issues and problems in hand, looking for solutions. Being responsible is essential, not finding fault or seeking to apportion the blame. Good drama is like music, it requires a rhythm, progression, a resolution to the conflict. having a strategy helps, but if you haven't got a strategy, or your strategy falls apart then do what all the good actors do and improvise.

"If all else fails read the script.." This keeps you on the ball when it comes to the plot. But then you get people who've lost the plot, the conflict stagnates and the drama turns to comedy, or... horror. So what if the script fails?

Change it. It's that simple. It's your life, you're the director. And you only got one production.




Prinsexx -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 5:51:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

No, I just can't stand idiots who repeat the same pattern over and over and over and who always blame someone else and just can't manage to look in the mirror of self reflection and see their own role in that drama because actually becoming healthy is just to damn much work for them.

But can't you see that that is:
1. A projection of your own standards of 'health onto others
2. A judgement as to how much work a person is or is not doing.
So be it.





BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 6:38:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: stella41b

So what about those previously who claim to be drama-free? Does this mean they live in a broom cupboard? No it doesn't. They're not really talking about drama, but about melodrama - sensational drama, the stuff that grips the emotions and causes stress. 
YES!  That's the word I should have been using all along!  thank you!

My approach to life is the same as theatre, deal with the issues and problems in hand, looking for solutions. Being responsible is essential, not finding fault or seeking to apportion the blame. Good drama is like music, it requires a rhythm, progression, a resolution to the conflict. having a strategy helps, but if you haven't got a strategy, or your strategy falls apart then do what all the good actors do and improvise.

"If all else fails read the script.." This keeps you on the ball when it comes to the plot. But then you get people who've lost the plot, the conflict stagnates and the drama turns to comedy, or... horror. So what if the script fails?

Change it. It's that simple. It's your life, you're the director. And you only got one production.
[sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif][sm=applause.gif]
Beautiful!




Prinsexx -> RE: Life is drama and drama is life? (8/5/2008 6:43:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

The impression I get from the majority of your posts is that you spend an awful lot of time trying to complicate things so that you can make them different from other peoples experiences.


Camille i could post about what i cooked for breakfast if you prefer but then you would probably just say oh i cook that too and accuse me of being boring......anyway no matter




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