RE: What's With the Attitude?

RE: What's With the Attitude? (Full Version)

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missturbation -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 2:41:46 PM)
quote: Are you always the fantasy french maid, who never feels angry, frustrated, tired, aggravated, etc? No lol. I am mostly the covered in sweat, make up smeared, cum dripping whore that is really not feeling like cleaning the toys and tidying up after 'play'. I can't speak from a domestic point of view because i don't do anything domestic for him. quote: Are you allowed to express when you don't like what you are told to do, or are you required to stuff your feelings and pretend to be happy about it? God no. Sir likes nothing more than to know i am wallowing in misery about doing certain things. He wouldn't allow me to whinge though.

fluffyswitch -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 2:50:12 PM)
He wants me to be as obeidient as i can be, but assuming that i'm not taking out aggression directly at Him He doesn't particularly care what attitude i'm in while i'm doing it. though the few times i have actually gotten angry with Him it wasn't about the dynamic (we're not 24/7) and it was talked through and worked through with little to no lasting damage. He's aware that i'm not full of sunshine and light, and that more often than i not i have a very good talent at inserting my foot into my open mouth at any chance i get. He knew that going into it, and has told me directly He's more interested in what i do to please Him than what mindset i am or am not in when i go about doing it- as long as i'm not taking out my day on Him.

Maxwell67 -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 3:24:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: StormsSlave For the domly types, would you prefer honest emotion, or do you expect cheerful acquiescence evey time? If that's the case, do you believe your sub truly enjoys all that you ask of her/him? I do not just prefer honest emotion, I require it. Honesty is a cornerstone of our relationship. I go to great lengths to root out my own self-deceptions and hers as well, to expose them and address them, and the idea that Mine might put on a happy face just to spare me the burden of knowing she was unhappy bothers me a lot. How can I treat a malady if she is hiding it from me?

DarkQc -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 5:10:06 PM)
Like others have said honesty is extremely important and I expect total honesty in all things. This goes for answering directy questions but also for keeping informed me of thoughts and feelings I might not have considered to asking about. I don't expect service with a smile and in absolute terms I'm less concerned about my sub's mood than her obedience. Of course that doesn't mean I don't care about her state of mind, because I do deeply, but a discussion about why she feels the way she does is better delayed until we can discuss it with a little perspective.

kiwisub12 -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 5:27:43 PM)
i am lucky in that i am a calm, generally happy person. And when i am not, a short quick rant usually gets the poison out of my system. My Sir knows that i don't want to cook after working 8 to 10 hours - so he wants me to cook .... but simple , quick to prepare food. I am responsible for the housework, and i am so not a housfrau, so he isn't too fussy about the way the house looks. thank goddess!!! and as hard as it is to believe - myself included - is that i haven't ever been angry or irritated with my Sir. very odd.

ProtagonistLily -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 5:41:49 PM)
quote: So, where do you sit? Are you always the fantasy french maid, who never feels angry, frustrated, tired, aggravated, etc? LOL...no. I don't even own that outfit... But seriously, I, like you, am expected to be a partner in this relationship, regardless of the power exchange. And part of being a partner is being authentic, and no faked orgasms so to speak. However, I'm not allowed to just melt down and 'be' emotional. It is expected that I handle my emotions with some control and in an appropriate manner. I've gotten soooo way better about this but sometimes, I lose it. I don't get punished, but he is pretty clear about how that behavior tends not to be productive, and he will employ communication, training and exercises that help me to deal with my emotions more productively. He employs behavior modification rather than straight punishment, and sometimes he uses deprivation as a behavior mod tool. quote: Are you allowed to express when you don't like what you are told to do, or are you required to stuff your feelings and pretend to be happy about it? Again, I can do what ever I want, remembering that behavior is a choice, but that some behavior will garner negative consequences. It's *how* I express myself that's important. He's fairly reasonable and if I bring a valid, significant reason to the table in a respectful way, he may modify. "I don't wanna" does not meet either valid or significant in our world. [8\|] PL

KnightofMists -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 5:44:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: StormsSlave For the domly types, would you prefer honest emotion, or do you expect cheerful acquiescence evey time? If that's the case, do you believe your sub truly enjoys all that you ask of her/him? Just curious to see where folks stand. Honest emotions constructively expressed! Having emotions is not a free rein to express them in any way they see fit. Lastly.. I don't believe or expect my girls to enjoy everything I ask them to do.... but that doesn't stop me from having them do it either.

slavegirljoy -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 5:51:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: StormsSlave Are you always the fantasy french maid, who never feels angry, frustrated, tired, aggravated, etc? Are you allowed to express when you don't like what you are told to do, or are you required to stuff your feelings and pretend to be happy about it? Even though i am a very positive person and don't let negative feelings take a hold over me for long, i am human and i do get tired and i do get frustrated (although not nearly as much as i did before becoming Master David's slave). But, being tired or frustrated doesn't excuse me from fulfilling my obligations and responsibilities. i am responsible for taking care of certain things and they need to be done, no matter how i'm feeling. i was a single mom for many years and got used to having to take care of my responsibilities no matter how i was feeling. i don't have to like everything i do in order to be happy with my life. And, i don't have to be in a good mood all the time to do what's required of me. But, what do i have to be in a bad mood about? i'm living my dream. i love being His servant and doing whatever He needs or wants me to do, whether it's a pleasant task or not. i'm in my element as His servant. i'm doing what i am good at and what i feel i was made for. i live in a beautiful house and get a lot of satisfaction from keeping it clean. i get to work in a huge yard and get my gardening fix every day. i belong to a wonderful Master who i respect and admire and love more every day that i get to spend with Him. i have beautiful children that bring me immense love and sweet dogs that are wonderful companions. There's some stress in my life, of course but, not much. Just yesterday, i went to the doctor for a regular check-up and my blood pressure was just 110/76! Not bad for a 52 year old. Even still, my Master won't let me do things when i'm sick or hurt. He asks me all the time about how i am feeling. He has me take my prosthetic leg off so that He can look to see if i have any sores and makes me stay off my feet when i do. He also insists on me sharing my feelings and thoughts with Him. He encourages me to keep a journal, which He reads and asks me about. He won't let me keep my feelings hidden from Him. joy Owned servant of Master David

charlie63 -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 5:52:54 PM)
It was much more imperative for me to hide my real feelings and pretend to be happy and adoring in my vanilla marriage. Expressing anything even remotely negative led to huge, nasty fights where my emotions were used as weapons against me. I am determined to be honest with my Dom and he is good about listening but expects me to be respectful about it. He doesn't like pouting, so it's best to just tell him how I'm feeling. Having that outlet to express how I really feel gives me what I need to then just do what it is that is expected of me without an attitude. That being said, I can get pretty pissy after a trying day at work and although he is patient with it to a point sometimes he has to call me on it.

MaamJay -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/6/2008 7:40:12 PM)
No hiding things here either. violet tries to serve graciously, but He knows when i am tired or sore from various health issues (having a bad run lately with an abscess in an armpit, i'll spare you the gory details on that one! and now a twisted and compressed left side of my back) so He doesn't expect me to be all glowing at the moment. It's been tough to get up early on the mornings He's now working to get His breakfast, but i have done so and i serve Him graciously ... albeit rather stiffly! He's not getting His curtseys at the moment though, and He totally understands why. We are very real with each other, and at the moment, i'm not supposed to be bending (chiropractor's orders) so Master is needing to bend and pick up pet bowls etc before He goes to work so i can feed them (i just drop the bowls ... one dog got in the way the other day and got a shock LOL!). Master's kind and there are often things He will do to spare me physically, and i tell Him how much i appreciate that. He also thanks me for what i do for Him. Most of the time both of us do things with a positive attitude, just sometimes i grumble a bit ... and sometimes He grumbles a bit ... then we usually take the mickey out of the grumbles and end up laughing! i couldn't serve Him if i couldn't be the real me ... and if He wasn't being the real Him. And as a Domme, I want the same for the lucky sub I hope to ultimately find! violet[A] aka Maam Jay

AllietheKitten -> RE: What's With the Attitude? (8/7/2008 1:57:05 AM)
I need my sub to be a human. I love his when he's frustrated and upset because he comes to me and talks to me. I love that he confides in me. No, I don't expect fantasy 24/7. I don't even expect compliance all the time. If he has questions are concerns he voices them-this is how be build trust. But them, I'm not into the obedience training as much as some Domme's are.

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