Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life?

Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (Full Version)

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oceanwynds -> Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 7:44:58 AM)
Greetings everyone i did not open to my submissive nature until my mid-fifties. Was in a vanilla marriage for 29 years until hubby died. When met Sir 2 years ago, i never heard of BDSM, Ds or Ms. There was a pull in me though to open myself up to see if i am submissive. These past two years have openned my heart to such a depth that words cannot describe. i still consider myself very new to all this and will be forever growing. Wondering if anyone else open to their submissiveness later in life and how did you move out of the mind set of a vanilla relationship to a Ds/Ms one?

MstrDennynSlave -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 8:10:20 AM)
I didnt become submissive til I was 46. I've always been a little left of center my whole life, but never realized there was a whole lifestyle devoted to BDSM. I started out as a Domme when I was 45. I have always been in control in everything my whole life. So naturally I thought a Domme would be a perfect fit. I just wasn't happy though. I became a submissive 3 months after my 46th birthday and a month later I became a slave to my Master. I've never been happier than I am right now. Master and I are such a perfect fit, that we both have often wondered where the other was our whole lives........lol. As I said, I've always been left of center, so moving into the mindset of a Ds/Ms relationship was actually very easy. There were things that I always wanted to try, but didnt have a willing partner. Now, I get to grow and explore for the rest of my life. Master has often asked me if I miss being a Domme. My answer has always been "no". I'm too happy and content serving and pleasing my Master.

peppermint -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 8:43:05 AM)
I didn't discover all this until i was in my late 40s and wasn't able to participate until i was 53. That is so much younger than a friend who discovered her submissive side at 67. Moving out of a vanilla mind set was not a problem as my mind set was essentially submissive in all my previous relationships.

littleone35 -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 9:55:41 AM)
I always have been but i did not have a name for it until i was 30. iIfought it then at 32 embraced it, and have been lucky to fund a wonderful Master. Matt's littleone

candystripper -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 10:22:57 AM)
Yes; I had never heard of D/s until 3 years ago. All my life I'd had the feelings and desires, as far back as I can remember, but I always thought I was just insecure or needy to want a man to run my life and protect me....so finding D/s was a wonderful thing and yes, I also feel I'll be learning forever. candystripper

oceanwynds -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 12:50:35 PM)
Thank you everyone for your replies. i never been in the norm of life, but always consider me; a person without labels. Sir and i met because we both had an interest in astrology and new age topics. When we met and he started to mention BDSM i was totally lost. It has been a hard road for me to understand my own submissive nature without boxing myself into someone else's view of what BDSM is suppose to be. i am glad i started to read these message boards. They have been a wonderful help to me. Thank you again for taking the time to reply.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 4:58:11 PM)
The great majority of people still find this all when they are in their 30s/40s. This will likely change with my and future generations.

califsue -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 6:31:01 PM)
In my 30's I knew I felt submissive but didn't know anything about BDSM and started exploring in my late 30's on and off over the course of 10 years. I got out of it for a couple years and was trying vanilla again and it just wasn't satisfactory for me. I was 50 when I first my Master and although we only recently started our relationship in earnest in April of this year we kept in contact only as friends and occasional play partner and nothing more for a couple of years. It is the best and more than I could have ever hope for. I am so glad that I said yes to him when he asked if I was ready to take it to the next level. In some ways, I envy the younger ones who discover and know what they want ast such a tender young age. However, I trust that my experiences have brought me to where I am today and am grateful for the past even with all the pains and hurt. Life is a journey to learn, grow from and enjoy.

oceanwynds -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 6:49:06 PM)
Thank you califsue , L. A. and everyone for your replies. i do not regret anything in my life. i traveled the paths that have enhanced my life. Being of the Woodstock generation, a pagan in my early 20's , a wife of a long term marriage, i just created me through the decades. i remember starting up Woman's rights groups in the late 60's and early 70's, and always seen myself as an intelligent female. There always was a nurturing and caring part of me, a big part since most of my work dealt with helping people. One thing i didnt ever look at was what submissive meant. These past two years as i travel this path of submissive it has brought me closer to the whole of me as well as the Goddess i serve. i have also found other pagan friends on line that i have known for years were also living as slaves or submissives. My husband got a lot of my submissive nature, but i was too dumb to realize it. i wanted to be strong. i am happy now that i do not equate submissivness or slave with adjectives as weak, mindless etc. That is not the case at all. Blessings, oceanwynds

angelspassion4u -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 8:09:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: oceanwynds Greetings everyone i did not open to my submissive nature until my mid-fifties. Was in a vanilla marriage for 29 years until hubby died. When met Sir 2 years ago, i never heard of BDSM, Ds or Ms. There was a pull in me though to open myself up to see if i am submissive. These past two years have openned my heart to such a depth that words cannot describe. i still consider myself very new to all this and will be forever growing. Wondering if anyone else open to their submissiveness later in life and how did you move out of the mind set of a vanilla relationship to a Ds/Ms one? I am 40 I found this lifestyle 2 years ago. I have now realized that I have always been a submissive since I was very young, I just didn't know it or could put a name to it. I have yet to expierence a real BDSM relationship but look forward to finding my Daddy Dom one day.

corsetgirl -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/8/2008 11:32:29 PM)
In my 20's, I repressed my submissiveness because I wanted to be the independent, strong feminist who naively believed that if a woman behaves that way then she is degrading herself. I also grew up Catholic, which was expected of me to go to that vanilla route of being married, having a nice Catholic husband, and raising children. I was married at a late age, do not have children of my own and later divorced the husband because there were issues of mental and physical abuse. I was 43 years old when I first experience being submissive and when this is with the right person who has that connection, this relationship is wonderful. I no longer have a dom but I am learning about myself and some valuable lessons along the way. I have now come to realization that a sub or slave can have a sense of strength, empowerment, and liberation, yet have that softness, which is very appealing to me.

leadership527 -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/9/2008 9:24:49 AM)
My wife and I discovered M/s as a relationship pattern at the ages of 52 and 44 respectively. For us, the transition was smooth and seamless... It just kind of grew organically between us after we were introduced to the whole concept online.

kajjirus -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/9/2008 3:11:20 PM)
This is pretty much my story, except from a male perspective. So, I was unable to act at all on my feelings, then. It is still pretty hard, but I'm working on it.... quote: ORIGINAL: corsetgirl In my 20's, I repressed my submissiveness because I wanted to be the independent, strong feminist who naively believed that if a woman behaves that way then she is degrading herself. I also grew up Catholic, which was expected of me to go to that vanilla route of being married, having a nice Catholic husband, and raising children. I was married at a late age, do not have children of my own and later divorced the husband because there were issues of mental and physical abuse. I was 43 years old when I first experience being submissive and when this is with the right person who has that connection, this relationship is wonderful. I no longer have a dom but I am learning about myself and some valuable lessons along the way. I have now come to realization that a sub or slave can have a sense of strength, empowerment, and liberation, yet have that softness, which is very appealing to me.

proudsub -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/9/2008 4:35:19 PM)
I was also in my mid-50'd when i learned about BDSM and put a name to my submissive behaviour.

caro44 -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/9/2008 4:46:05 PM)
I discovered that there was a name for the feelings I had been having 3 and a half years ago at age 60. 2 years ago I found the man who brings out my submissiveness, I have never been happier. I just wish he didn't live so far away. ______________________________________________ Resident Secret Agent

devil4sex -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/11/2008 1:52:05 AM)
All my life I have been pleased to do things for others and enjoyed. Was introduced to BDSM by my Master last year he collared me after 3 months but I did not really understand. He lives a long way away from me and with my 'vanilla' life I have to dress and act accordingly although I always wore the collar constantly. I was on my own for 20 years (by choice) until I met my Master on a 'vanilla' dating site and he introduced me from then on. I am 62 by the way. It is hard being a submissive when you spend so much time in 'your own world' and then for two or three days go into what you really want.

sujuguete -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/11/2008 3:34:28 PM)
I discovered D/s at age 45. A member on a professional (vanilla) forum where I participate told me I had submissive qualities. I had no idea what he was talking about, and when he explained and sent me links for information, it opened up a whole, new, wonderful world for me. The more I read, the more it was like someone peeled the film off the mirror and I could see myself for who and what I truly am. I was blessed to find a Dominant who was willing to help me explore my submissive tendencies, and to discover and expand my boundaries. He made it easy to transition from my vanilla past to a D/s relationship.

nejisty -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/11/2008 4:08:58 PM)
I was 39 recently widowed and ran across a website that spoke of BDSM. The proverbial light went off when I read about submission. Every piece of my past snapped into place. Because of my location and responsibilities RT is very difficult. nejisty

sistermargaret -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/11/2008 6:10:59 PM)
i've been in the Lifestyle for about 10 yrs RT, and locked that side of myself away all that time, floating on the surface of BDSM as a Switch. It is only this spring that i opened that door and followed Master in there. i'm 58. It is bliss. sm

AnnaOfAramis -> RE: Has anyone discoverd being a submissive later in life? (8/13/2008 8:34:07 AM)
Greetings, I have always been this way but did not have a word for it, or understand what it was until I was about 35. anna

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