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RE: Age and Trainability - 8/8/2008 8:45:38 PM   
AcademyForSlaves


Posts: 712
Joined: 2/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hi.

It's possible they were concerned that if your a newbie at 45 that you might be really set in your ways and it'd be hard to break any selfish habits. But other than that it doesn't matter what a age a slave is. We train and own slaves of all ages and the only thing that makes a good slave is the ability and williness to obey. If you can obey commands then you've got what it takes to become a good slave.

Hope this helps.

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(in reply to Roselaure)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/8/2008 9:04:34 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I dont mean to hijack this but she said sub, not slave.

(in reply to AcademyForSlaves)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/8/2008 10:21:22 PM   
CNJDom


Posts: 186
Joined: 6/6/2006
From: Southern NJ
Status: offline 		I don't feel that age is really the factor here concerning trainability.  I feel that the desire for submission is either IN you or NOT.  Training implies that there is something to work with inside.  I find it hard to instill submission in them and for them to truly enjoy it.  It just has to be there first.  I feel you can't make a submissive or make a Dominant.  You can guide, train, and encourage...but if it ain't a duck:  then it's not a duck!

If you were to judge a submissive's trainability by their age, then you'd have to do the same for the potency of the Dominant wouldn't you?  There might be a shelf-life for a Dominant...I feel that we are narrowing our minds to think that age is a factor here.  Learned responses can be unlearned and reapplied.  With proper training you can do a lot, but with a desire prior to that training that is driving that submissive to be all she can be, well that is far better.   span.jajahWrapper { font-size:1em; color:#B11196; text-decoration:underline; } a.jajahLink { color:#000000; text-decoration:none; } span.jajahInLink:hover { background-color:#B11196; }

(in reply to Roselaure)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/8/2008 10:37:09 PM   
heartcream


Posts: 3044
Joined: 5/9/2007
From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
Status: offline 		Ha, ha I think you hit the nail on the head when you called the guy a tool.

If I got that email, I woulda been like, "Loser." When someone contacts me right out of the gate with a derogatory, insulting tone, like he/she is putting me down, I like to delete.

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(in reply to CNJDom)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/8/2008 10:41:57 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		When someone says I need training, I always think, "but I already know how to use the big-girl potty".


Cali


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(in reply to heartcream)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/9/2008 4:32:32 AM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

When someone says I need training, I always think, "but I already know how to use the big-girl potty".

Cali


Bolded to point out where most of the legitimate, and therefore usually most controversial, training occurs.  I'm surprised no one brought up the physical v. mental training aspect.  After all, "How do you like your coffee, Sir?" involves actions that are carried out physically, but mentally ingrained [as a task - and one that a sub or slave might be expected to do].

Age is a factor in the learning process.  Older doesn't mean less or more capable, instead it means you learn differently.  Training is just another word for learning.  Adult schooling provides interesting insights in how the adult mind functions differently than a teen's, for example.

As for importance, OP, well...it's subjective.  What do you want?  What do they want?  If it ever came to learning something, are you aware of what works for you when it comes to learning, and can you communicate that effectively?  If so, you're fine; no worries.


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(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/9/2008 4:52:22 AM   
RavenMuse


Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Roselaure
My question is, how important is factor is age in whether a submissive or slave is "trainable"? 


Very minor. Other factors in their life have a big impact and the ONLY part age plays is that an older girl is likely to have had more of those kind of factors setting habits and mindsets that make training more difficult.

quote:

What is the most important factor? 


submission, dedication, connection - in short the motivational link between the girl and the Dom/Master. If that drive in her, her connection to Him is stronger than those other factors then age becomes totaly irrelevant in terms of how she takes to His 'training'


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(in reply to Roselaure)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/9/2008 4:52:24 AM   
Roselaure


Posts: 672
Joined: 4/12/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CNJDom

I don't feel that age is really the factor here concerning trainability.  I feel that the desire for submission is either IN you or NOT.  Training implies that there is something to work with inside.  I find it hard to instill submission in them and for them to truly enjoy it.  It just has to be there first.  I feel you can't make a submissive or make a Dominant.  You can guide, train, and encourage...but if it ain't a duck:  then it's not a duck!



That's it really.  While I think age is A factor, and there are many traits and tendencies that factor in to how successful teaching a sub is going to be, both for the Dominant and the submissive, it's not the most important one or even really all that significant.  

I've been greeted more rudely on cmail and this one at least led to an interesting discussion. 

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Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.
-Virginia Woolf

(in reply to CNJDom)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/9/2008 5:00:59 AM   
Roselaure


Posts: 672
Joined: 4/12/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

submission, dedication, connection - in short the motivational link between the girl and the Dom/Master. If that drive in her, her connection to Him is stronger than those other factors then age becomes totaly irrelevant in terms of how she takes to His 'training'



What I bolded in the quote is the essence of what makes a good fit in a dynamic or any kind of relationship.  If I am connected to someone, my desire to learn and please them is overpowering.  If I'm not,  well, what's the point?

_____________________________

Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.
-Virginia Woolf

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/9/2008 5:15:18 AM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		set in your ways  i tink that is the term 

we can learn at any age    it also depends on a doms skill set    or a good or bad dom   training someone is a skill not just a read how to book and there ya go
how stupid is that  bdsm for dummies rofl ok that was bad but any how

learn the right way  choose a wise partner on both sides not just a fashionable kinkster  they are a flash in the pan      a wise parnter will can be trained on both sides sub and dom

< Message edited by LATEXBABY64 -- 8/9/2008 5:17:50 AM >

(in reply to Roselaure)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/9/2008 6:54:23 AM   
sblady


Posts: 433
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline 		I had no idea D/s or M/s existed until last year (at the age of 41).  To a degree, I have been submissive in all  my relationships unless I had to do otherwise and have been in one real time D/s relationship. 

Regardless of  past "training", I'll still have to "learn" what my next partner would like, even something as simple as how many lumps of sugar they'd like in their coffee.  Heck, they may not drink coffee!!

So, yep....methinks you are correct; he was a tool. 

(in reply to Roselaure)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Age and Trainability - 8/9/2008 3:20:41 PM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline 		Well, the absolute best age(s) to start "training" someone to behave exactly the way you want them to, according to those such as DC Hammond and other mental health professionals who work with conditioning/cults etc, is before 18 months, ages 3-5 and 11-13.

After that, well, it's a whole lot harder.

Wait, that wasn't the answer you were looking for was it?

(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 32
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