RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way?

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 9:43:14 AM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: rubikscube

Hello Everyone,

Recently I've contacted a female dom introducing myself and expressing my interest to serve her. Her profile was filled out, but from her description it sounded like all she wanted was a tribute. Luckily for me I found an in; she had a journal entry asking for intelligent subs who could do work for her.

Now I am a smart guy. I figured, sure, a little math and I'll be in the door. Unfortunately she sends me 5 written assignments on a topic I haven't studied for over 3 years, with no guarantee / offer of furthering our relationship attached.

So now I am stuck to make the hard choice. She is beautiful and from her profile it seems as though we share similar interests, but the fact of the matter is that I really have no idea what she is like or if this is just some ploy she uses to get her homework done.

Have any other subs been in a similar position? Did you take this risk, or pass on what is probably a scam.

Along those same lines: When first contacting a dom, do you play it very straight or immediately throw yourself at their feet? I do enjoy submitting, but I also need to get to know this person first, so I guess I tend to present as a mixed bag, which may be a turn off. Perhaps that is a better question for the doms.

Thanks for all your thoughts!

-JT

I wish I could get subs willing to do meaningless boring tasks for me (ie research) and at least I would be willing to send toys (well, and they'd have to send pics of them using the toys) as compenstation so at least the exchange is fair...

A femdom POV -- having a man do tasks or serve without knowing him at all, and having some interest in his welfare or personality - means she's more interested in the end result and not the process.

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to rubikscube)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 9:58:04 AM

MamaDomme1

Posts: 377
Joined: 1/12/2008
Status: offline

You really need to get off the internet in order to find someone that meets your needs. Your chances are slim of it happening online. You are close enough to Boston and there is a huge BDSM community up there.... find the nearest TNG group and get involved with them. Your profile says that you enjoy volunteerism-- get out from behind your computer screen and volunteer for some real things. Then, some lovely Domme will notice your unselfish acts of kindness, be overwhelmed and will shove a lovely pony-tailed plug in your rump and collar you.

(in reply to rubikscube)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 10:26:54 AM

shadowcd

Posts: 88
Joined: 6/23/2008
Status: offline

Well from my point of view, I would view it as a way to prove myself. I would probally do the work and hope I pleased her enough to move forward. That is assumeing the profile itself interested me enough to make me want to move forward with so little personal contact. Either that or I would have tried to get more information first. accepting the work and then wondering if you should have doesn't seem right :( I mean if someone posted looking for volonteer to do such and such and you accepted the job only to get upset you didn't get paid who's fault is that?

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 12:07:12 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

Okay... so you thought if you did what she wanted or needed... you could position yourself and get in the door and when you did get in said door, you didn't like what she asked of you? Dang... sounds like a lot of manipulation on both sides.

What ever happened to becoming friends and getting to know one another before all this other stuff? Jumping in and playing with fire, typically ends with someone burned. Don't be so hungry and find a balance and someone you can be friends with or relate to on a personal level. I think you will do much better. Good luck.

(in reply to shadowcd)

Profile

Post #: 24

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 1:07:20 PM

rubikscube

Posts: 25
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline

Just to clarify:

1) I am not upset. I was just wondering if this was a scam. (Come to find out it probably was)
2) I never did any of the work, the length of the exchange was literally three emails.

I did try to contact the other sub (http://www.collarchat.com/m_2014049/mpage_1/key_homework/tm.htm#2014158 ) to see if we're dealing with the same user. My guess is that it's a different user, but same person behind the scenes.

Thanks to everyone who responded!

(in reply to Lockit)

Profile

Post #: 25

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 1:18:13 PM

Madame4a

Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline

I think you should cut and paste this advice regularly.. just change the name of the city or town...

when I go to a play party or dungeon.. that's the first thing I notice.. who's volunteered to work and what are they doing... I notice that WAY before I notice people milling about or playing

quote:

ORIGINAL: MamaDomme1

You really need to get off the internet in order to find someone that meets your needs. Your chances are slim of it happening online. You are close enough to Boston and there is a huge BDSM community up there.... find the nearest TNG group and get involved with them. Your profile says that you enjoy volunteerism-- get out from behind your computer screen and volunteer for some real things. Then, some lovely Domme will notice your unselfish acts of kindness, be overwhelmed and will shove a lovely pony-tailed plug in your rump and collar you.

_____________________________

You're crazy bitch
But you f*ck so good, I'm on top of it
When I dream, I'm doing you all night
Scratches all down my back to keep me right on

(in reply to MamaDomme1)

Profile

Post #: 26

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 2:43:03 PM

subeos

Posts: 140
Joined: 5/23/2008
Status: offline

Never jeopardize your submission for needing to serve. There will come a day when you will get that chance. Be patience. It sucks that happen to you. But chalk it up to a lesson well learned.

slave eos

(in reply to Madame4a)

Profile

Post #: 27

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 4:22:08 PM

E2Sweet

Posts: 649
Joined: 7/8/2008
From: TopLeftCornerOf, OH, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

....What ever happened to becoming friends and getting to know one another before all this other stuff?...

Indeed. Taking time to getting to know each other FIRST is a pretty good way to keep from getting scammed from the start. I hear it has some other advantages as well.

...and I gotta say, posing as a Domme to get out of homework assignments = lame. The needle is pegged and there's smoke and sparks pouring out of my bullshit-o-meter right now.

_____________________________

E2Sweet™
"If it doesn't make you smile then chances are you're not doing it right."

(in reply to Lockit)

Profile

Post #: 28

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 4:50:46 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

I agree. I was nice before, but the way this thread is going, I have to say we could rephrase the concept as: "Engaging in academic dishonesty to score some kinky pussy."

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to E2Sweet)

Profile

Post #: 29

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 4:59:15 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

ROFL RedMagic

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Profile

Post #: 30

RE: Am I Being Used ... In A Bad Way? - 8/12/2008 6:00:53 PM

MamaDomme1

Posts: 377
Joined: 1/12/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Madame4a

I think you should cut and paste this advice regularly.. just change the name of the city or town...

when I go to a play party or dungeon.. that's the first thing I notice.. who's volunteered to work and what are they doing... I notice that WAY before I notice people milling about or playing

quote:

ORIGINAL: MamaDomme1

You really need to get off the internet in order to find someone that meets your needs. Your chances are slim of it happening online. You are close enough to Boston and there is a huge BDSM community up there.... find the nearest TNG group and get involved with them. Your profile says that you enjoy volunteerism-- get out from behind your computer screen and volunteer for some real things. Then, some lovely Domme will notice your unselfish acts of kindness, be overwhelmed and will shove a lovely pony-tailed plug in your rump and collar you.

So do I-- from the moment I walk in the door, I look to see who's working it, who's taking care of the drinks & snacks, whose cleaning the butt cans outside... everything. Those that are good workers get my attention and respect very quickly.

(in reply to Madame4a)

Profile

Post #: 31