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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 2:27:40 PM

CallaFirestormBW

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

In my experience, chastity hasn't really been about killing the sex drive but denying orgasm. In the past, when involved in this sort of thing, a dominant has no problem with me being sexually stimulated, but she disallows her subject to have an orgasm, actually making the frustration even worse than before because not only are you overly excited, but you aren't allowed to have final relief. Chastity is usually enforced to keep the slave from having his own orgasm without her being the cause or the one to orchestrate it. In this aspect, it's the control that becomes the stimulation, but it's always with the struggle and desire to eventually achieve some kind of sexual release. Without that part, it just becomes asexual behavior, which is where I think people are mistaking chastity when it comes to a play activity, or even a lifestyle one.

Again, the second situation is much more the case in our household than the first. Neither my Darling nor I practice withholding of orgasm -- but my Darling (who really manages all the sexual aspects of our household) prefers to control who, how, and when our servants express themselves sexually.

Like Mama, we've had a number of gentlemen who -desire- prolonged chastity of the "withholding orgasm" variety, but like the ones who won't do chastity at all, we tend not to progress with them in terms of their service to us.

In general, I'm not looking for a sexual relationship with my servants. I don't mind where and how they manage their sexuality -- but because my Darling -is- interested, and because we share, most of our boys (and girls) will have some measure of chastity enforced, in terms of the control end of things.

CFB

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 2:30:00 PM

Venatrix

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Thanks for drawing my attention to his profile. A big dick and offers a million bucks, huh? Modest little chap, isn't he?

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 2:30:04 PM

Lockit

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I was commenting more on what sillyslaveboy was saying. I love the tease, the way of working that orgasm and such, but to have someone trained only to cum in one way or to keep them in long term chastity, just isn't my thing and I think a lot of it is dangerous. It surely isn't a dynamic I want in my relationship because I love having sex and often. If it were, I would be better versed in the dangers, but since it isn't my thing, I just have some basic's in knowledge on it. I do know men who have a difficult time sexually because they were not allowed to cum. It was more a psychological problem than physical. As long as one is milking, there shouldn't be too much of a physical problem.

I have used chastity and the way I used it, I loved it and so did he. But I could not do anything long term.

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

There is a lot wrong in killing the sex drive! Emotionally, physically... just not healthy!

In my experience, chastity hasn't really been about killing the sex drive but denying orgasm. In the past, when involved in this sort of thing, a dominant has no problem with me being sexually stimulated, but she disallows her subject to have an orgasm, actually making the frustration even worse than before because not only are you overly excited, but you aren't allowed to have final relief. Chastity is usually enforced to keep the slave from having his own orgasm without her being the cause or the one to orchestrate it. In this aspect, it's the control that becomes the stimulation, but it's always with the struggle and desire to eventually achieve some kind of sexual release. Without that part, it just becomes asexual behavior, which is where I think people are mistaking chastity when it comes to a play activity, or even a lifestyle one.

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 2:39:41 PM

Irishm57

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hmm the idea of chastity is to control sex drive, well control when the thingy is free to explore the drive.. If wearing a chastity device destroys your sex drive, i would assume would mean either in an open relationship or self pleasure. Just because George carlin once said "if god didn't want us to masterbate he would have made our arms shorter", to me is the same idea, not sure how shorter arms or chastity would destroy sex drive..

< Message edited by Irishm57 -- 8/13/2008 2:43:33 PM >

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 2:48:13 PM

Prinsexx

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

quote:

my balls are born free

I wish I could say that!

I grant you your wish........(irony).
Now just practice slowly at first ok.....the first word is:
I
The second word is
Wish
The third word is:
I....
actually i give up i really can't do this in control thing......

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 2:48:21 PM

windchymes

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A million smackers? Hell, I'll let ya go commando!

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 2:48:46 PM

CallaFirestormBW

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Irishm57

hmm the idea of chastity is to control sex drive, well control when the thingy is free to explore the drive.. If wearing a chastity device destroys your sex drive, i would assume would mean either in an open relationship or self pleasure. Just because George carlin once said "if god didn't want us to masterbate he would have made our arms shorter", to me is the same idea, not sure how shorter arms or chastity would destroy sex drive..

Just a semantic clarificiation -- chastity isn't generally meant control the sex -drive- (unless you're talking about extreme chastity like castration)... it is meant merely to control the -expression- of the sex drive.

CFB

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/13/2008 9:00:39 PM

cmatrix4761

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Summo

Amazingly..people think a slave should have no limits...
I have many.
That was one of them.

BDSM (specifically, the Master/Slave relationship) is about finding and exploring limits; anyone who thinks slaves shouldn't have limits would make a terrible master!

-- Allen

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/14/2008 4:16:45 AM

Twicehappy2x

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cmatrix4761

BDSM (specifically, the Master/Slave relationship) is about finding and exploring limits

Golly gee! I never knew that!

You mean i've been doing it wrong all these years?

Damn, what am i going to tell my Master, Scooter about this?

You see, i was in a previous collar for almost two decades to someone who played fairly hard. In my current collar there is a lot of heavy play my owner simply does not care for. My play limits are extremely beyond his, and probably always will be.

Yet we have a wonderfully satisfying relationship.

Here i thought M/s was about caring, guiding, protecting, serving, and in at least our case, about love.

I could care less about him trying to find my limits or pushing them, i am positive Scooter could care less about that as well.

Too have a M/s relationship with him my requirements are fairly simple, i require him, period.

While you can have BDSM in a M/s relationship you can also have an M/s relationship without any BDSM at all.

As far as him pushing my vanilla limits, well he'll never get me to like country music but other than that there is not much he could try to push me to try or do that i am not already willing to try.

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/14/2008 4:32:09 AM

sillyslaveboy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
But I could not do anything long term.

So i will assume You actually knew what i consider for long term before You responed to my message. I made this detail public somewhere here.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit
There is a lot wrong in killing the sex drive! Emotionally, physically... just not healthy!

And oh, no - it IS great. To make slave wanting an orgasm only when asked for and not even having to use a sort of device on him? To make him be turned-on / off, independent on anything else but on a Mistress' whim? Yes, it is a masterpiece of objectification! The one i was used to and the one that i loved. The one that made really happy about. About health issues, i'd gladly see a study on the topic that will tell me anything new. :) Imho, there are much more dangerous things even non-BDSM people do in everyday's life and i am not nor i was put on anything that i would recognize as a health danger. No.

Still wanting to call it sick or whatever? Get in the row.

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RE: So..the chastity - 8/14/2008 4:48:16 AM

Abaddon2u

Posts: 49
Joined: 8/12/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

There is a lot wrong in killing the sex drive! Emotionally, physically... just not healthy!

I will have to agree, it appears that the OP posts and replies to the post , something must be hanging heavy on his mind.
Then again I could be wrong, it has been known to happen.

Abaddon
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RE: So..the chastity - 8/14/2008 5:12:43 AM

sillyslaveboy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Abaddon2u
I will have to agree, it appears that the OP posts and replies to the post

This usually happens when somebody has a thought or subject that needs to be posted separately from its explanation / discussion / whatever. That's the form. Still having content of these two posts on mind, i'd say the guy was actually more upset than Her. He shared it, and then he even abandoned the topic. Heh.

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RE: So..the chastity - 9/16/2008 6:53:03 PM

cmatrix4761

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Twicehappy2x

Golly gee! I never knew that!
...

I will never understand why people are obtusely rude -- it produces nothing of benefit but causes unnecessary conflict.

-- Allen

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