IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (Full Version)

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wipyouharder -> IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (8/21/2008 10:02:53 PM)

I have a submissive side which is unexplored, but it often involves thoughts of severe whippings Im not sure I could ever take in reality but crave it sometimes.
Is this something you come across often?





VMistressV -> RE: IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (8/21/2008 11:06:06 PM)

Yes that's quite common. We all want to have things or do things that we probably won't be able to handle. I want to eat an entire gallon of ice cream right now, but I know I'll go into a diabetic coma.
But you will be suprised sometimes by how much you can handle. Just keep doing what you like and don't become a slave to your fantasies.





iwantyounow21 -> RE: IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (8/21/2008 11:38:41 PM)

I have that same fantasy... hands tied above my head while a cruel Mistress relentlessly whips my whole body...  It kind of scares me sometimes when I catch myself thinking these things.




HeavansKeeper -> RE: IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (8/22/2008 1:16:07 AM)

Here's a hierarchy of when events are more extreme. Its not the same for everyone, but I feel its fairly generalizable.

Fantasy (inclusive of masturbation)
Online Play
Discussion
That Time In Vegas
Real Time Play
What You Publicly Discuss
Toasts Made At Weddings

Lets say the subject is into CBT. At the top, we have castration via hatchet fantasy. At the bottom, a raunchy joke about how he likes the fellas' pushed around a little.

It's natural to push things to and beyond the limit in your head.




MistressTaboo -> RE: IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (8/22/2008 10:06:16 AM)

Ok I think you are all missing the boat...

First he's a DOM...he wants to know as a DOM if it's ok to have a submissive side that he wants to explore.
I'm sure the second question will be how does he do that.

If I had a nickel for every male Dom that's said he wasn't to explore his submissive side I'd be a very very rich woman.

My opinion is that not everyone is 100% Dom or Sub. Some run 60/40 which makes them more of a switch, and some run closer to 80/20 every one's different.

Find a Domme you'd feel comfortable doing a scene with and give it a try. Be honest and upfront with her. You make like it.

I myself run closer to 85% Domme...but I love to have fire play performed on me...lucky for me my slave is a pyromaniac! But we wouldn't know if we hadn't of explored outside our titles.




ricar00 -> RE: IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (8/22/2008 10:13:50 AM)

i have several comments. 

First, you might find that trying out what you fantasize about may be something you can handle and may like or maybe not.  How will you ever know if you don't try?  I discovered for myself that i can handle a lot more than i ever imagined. 

Secondly, if you are switch, i think it is always good to experience the S/m from both sides of the coin.  It just opens up more understanding to what the other person is feeling.

Thirdly, being whipped severely is so yummy. But then i am a masochist.[:)]

ricar00




Pyrrsefanie -> RE: IS it normal to have masochistic tendencies well beyond what you believe you can take? (8/22/2008 11:23:38 AM)

Believe it or not I'm about 80/20 with my dominance... not enough for me to consider myself a real switch, but there are times when I'm just so exhausted or stressed from dominating that I top from the bottom for an evening, or a scene, or something like that.  There are times where I just need to be taken care of, too.

I don't have particularly masochistic fantasies, but when I get into this "aaagh!" space where I want to be the one laying down for a bit, I tend to go somewhat feral and start craving the dirtiest, nastiest kinky activity I can do within the restraints of the law.  And sometimes it feels like no matter WHAT my boy and I settle on it's not enough, but even I'm not depraved enough to figure out how to go beyond that!

It's frustrating! 




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