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leadership527 -> RE: How Similar Doms and Subs Can Be (8/28/2008 5:10:24 PM)
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Well damn LA. You mean it's really OK afterall that I'm a nice guy? *laughs* By the way, you've finally sold me on the whole authority transfer thing. I was resisting making up new words since TPE was already in place and, as flawed as it was, it roughly communicated. But I'm agreeing with you that it causes more trouble than the dubious communication value it provides. In the end, since the community as a whole can't agree on any definitions for anything, not even BDSM, I might as well personally use words that at least make sense.
OK, but more seriously and back to our regularly scheduled thread... Counting RL meetings only, most of the dominants that I have met have been fine, upstanding people who cared about those around them. When was it written that doms were arrogant, selfish bastards? For the record, I take a great deal of enjoyment and pride both in how well I serve my girl -- you know -- because I LOVE her and want the best for her. I also take great comfort in the knowledge that in serving her that well, I'm likely to still have her next year. Just as LA said, the only real difference between us (in this regard anyway) is that I enjoy having the authority and she enjoys not having it. I don't get a kick out of making someone laugh because it "shows mastery". I get a kick out of making them laugh because I have raised the overall level of happiness in the world by some tiny fraction. And who knows, I might also just have made a friend?
Bluntly, doms and subs are "similar" because they are both 99% human and 1% dom or sub.
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