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RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/30/2008 9:49:02 PM

kyraofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf
There is a place for third person speech, to take the focus off the individual, and self. It is even used in the military for such a mental conditioning "To force recruits to refer to themselves only in the third person helps them make the transition from the individualistic, selfish, "me culture" of civilian society, " http://www.temple.edu/isllc/newfolk/military/speech.html

To the OP,

This is probably one of the better explanations that I have seen for the use of third person speech. In our house, focus on the individual at the expense of the relationship is destructive to our relationship. Transitioning from putting the individual first to putting the relationship first takes effort. Third person speech is one tool that some find effective to accomplish this.

Obviously it is not a tool that is used in our house. He prefers to use different tools to put the focus on the relationship. For those who can use this tool skillfully to achieve the results they desire, then more power to them.

Knight's Kyra

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"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

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Post #: 21

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/30/2008 11:43:17 PM

MaamJay

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The one person on these boards who uses it beautifully is beth of Merc'n'beth. You hardly notice it so naturally does it flow.

I agree it is a tool that can be of use, especially if the one moving to be a sub or slave tends to be self-centred rather than other centred and needs a reminder of the new focus. It's not a tool I have sought to employ but would reserve it in My toolkit if needed. I've read enough of it in academic work to want to use it too regularly!

I use the caps and small letters to keep track of the 2 halves of my personality, caps for Jay, small letters for violet just so I know who is who! I have requested subs capitalise You to refer to Me and lower case their i simply as a mind tool for training purposes when writing. But that's only once we are past the initial overtures. In my journal for Master, i use small i for me as it is violet writing and capital Y for You referring to Master. i find it helps me keep my focus as violet instead of letting Jay sneak in.

In short, it's a tool. Nothing more, nothing less, and use it if you want, ignore it if you want! Respect that it might be someone else's kink and try not to heap shit on them!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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Post #: 22

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 3:43:01 AM

CallaFirestormBW

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We use speech modifications, including use of 3rd person speech, as an aspect of our household's practices (protocols). It is not used constantly -- primarily for training purposes or as an exercise in placing the focus of service outside of "I,me, mine". As others mentioned earlier, it is a good way to show (1) that the presence of ego in service is something that should be contained from becoming the sole purpose of service and (2) to reinforce that a given task could be performed by anyone in a similar position. Because of that, it is also useful during training, where the basic forms are emphasized before individual flourishes are added.

Another reason that we use 3rd person speech is because it is a challenging discipline, requiring a distinct and ongoing commitment from our servants in learning to use the form in a way that is pleasing to hear or read, yet which also promotes clear communication rather than obfuscation of the topic of conversation. This is a profound challenge, and is the reason why many of our deeply committed servants have used this form nearly exclusively -- as a mark of their commitment not -only- to their service, but to the particularly intense disciplines that reinforce the highly refined, challenging structure of a HB bond-servant, and which are above and beyond what would be required for a servant who was not ready or willing to be bound to this level.

Personally, if it is thoughtfully done, I find third-person and passive-voice speech restrictions to be a beautifully complex way of expressing servitude.

BTW, for the grammar afficionados (a term I much prefer to grammar Nazis), "I", "me", and "mine" are not superlatives. They are personal pronouns. "Mine" is a personal possessive pronoun. Superlatives are added to adjectives or adverbs to accentuate their peak nature (most, greatest, etc.).

Calla Firestorm

< Message edited by CallaFirestormBW -- 8/31/2008 3:47:49 AM >

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Post #: 23

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 6:30:11 AM

OrionTheWolf

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Speech restrictions and conditions alone do nothing. There are many things used in Internal Enslavement.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

This girl still thinks it is more often done to make the owner feel secure. The military does it to make one unit. With severe penalties for early withdrawal. If a guy can't inspire it from me no amount of vocal reconditioning is going to put me in that headspace.
Kyst

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When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

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Post #: 24

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 8:59:01 AM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

...I mean no disrespect to anyone, but WTF? I just want to understand why this has such importance...

to be sure, others will have different reasons for why they engage in the practice, but here's an explanation from one who does, that in no way is meant to suggest it is the only reason why ALL who do, do:

it pleases Master...so it is done.

it is no different than shaving certain areas He requires to be shaved, or any other activity Master gets pleasure from.

it has nothing to do with a deep seated desire to annoy folks, an unsatisfied public humiliation fetish, an attempt to be viewed as some sort of "Uber-slave" or even from a place that fancies third person speech when not directed to by the person in the relationship that calls the shots.

it has everything to do with pleasing Him.

(in reply to TwilightShadows)

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Post #: 25

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 11:37:12 AM

IvyMorgan

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I use third person when I'm feeling insecure, unsure, uncertain, or unstable. A running commentary, either audible or not, of my actions, in third person, help to ground, centre and focus me.

Certain aspects of my personality feel more comfortable not using first person (singular epecially) pronouns, in part because they do not like the direct attention that using them can be.

There is a distance that is created between the person/speaker and the action when using third person speach patters, and again, this is a comforting safety net type experience for me. In therapy, it can be used to slowly increase ownership of traumatic experience and to deal with that.

Just another reason why some people use third person.

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Post #: 26

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 5:42:44 PM

fyreredsub

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My former Owner had me use it. This was something that pleased Him.

I was to refer to myself as 'your girl' when speaking to Him. A constant in 'no' me or I.

The use of third reminded me He controlled my speech and it slowed my mouth down somewhat from overloading my ass.

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Post #: 27

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 5:44:17 PM

MidMichCowboy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

This woman finds it fucking annoying and would never be in a relationship that required it.

She is such a lovely lady isn't she .. so bright ... I like her.

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Post #: 28

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 5:48:24 PM

MidMichCowboy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

Tactfully challenged? Not at all. There is a place for third person speech, to take the focus off the individual, and self. It is even used in the military for such a mental conditioning "To force recruits to refer to themselves only in the third person helps them make the transition from the individualistic, selfish, "me culture" of civilian society, " http://www.temple.edu/isllc/newfolk/military/speech.html

It has nothing to do with being secure or insecure, though jumping to that conclusion could be kind of telling. Damn not very tactful eh? ;)

Listen, I don't care that others have it in their relationship. But not everyone needs it. I want a woman who is intelligence, independent, strong ... and mine. I want wonderful conversations and a rich communitive life. I don't want to listen to third person speech. I don't like it, I don't have to like it. My choice. If someone else feels the need for it in their relationship, go for it.

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Post #: 29

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 6:03:55 PM

hopelessfool

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I tend to use third person speech in several situations.

One I feel Ive done bad or a task and such, and appologize in such away.
It slips in now and again when Im feeling depressed and really dont want to feel "human"
Or when its hard to talk about points in my past, speaking in the third person makes it easier to cope with talking about because in the head it didnt happen to "me" It happened to "her".

If my partner wanted it, I think Id be able to do as such, it be an adjustment, but if it makes him happy, its not to terribly important on how I speak what I call myself (minus certian words, piglet still gets me angry as does just plain girl) Or the title he wishes to be adressed as, If he wants to be called Pinky, or Frilly, Or pretty lady, Then that is what I will call him.... Tis what is most pleasing to him. The only time It become a problem is if it interfeared with other things in life, say at work Id ask for speech restrictions to be taken off, or If calling him Master of All the Pink and Frilly Panties, would interfear with his job, I obviously shouldnt do it, With in the bosses earshot... Or if it messes with me in a negative way, being called girl it flips a switch and I get very very angry, it might not be the best title for me at this time.. ya know?

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Post #: 30

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 6:15:25 PM

OrionTheWolf

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That is fine if you do not want to listen to it.....but... it has nothing to do with being secure or insecure, has nothing to do with having a rich life or not, has nothing to do with whether the female is strong or not, it has nothing to do with intelligent conversations. It has to do with whether someone wants their slave or submissive to use it.

"There is nothing more treasured than the love of a slave girl."

quote:

ORIGINAL: MidMichCowboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

Tactfully challenged? Not at all. There is a place for third person speech, to take the focus off the individual, and self. It is even used in the military for such a mental conditioning "To force recruits to refer to themselves only in the third person helps them make the transition from the individualistic, selfish, "me culture" of civilian society, " http://www.temple.edu/isllc/newfolk/military/speech.html

It has nothing to do with being secure or insecure, though jumping to that conclusion could be kind of telling. Damn not very tactful eh? ;)

Listen, I don't care that others have it in their relationship. But not everyone needs it. I want a woman who is intelligence, independent, strong ... and mine. I want wonderful conversations and a rich communitive life. I don't want to listen to third person speech. I don't like it, I don't have to like it. My choice. If someone else feels the need for it in their relationship, go for it.

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

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Post #: 31

RE: Third Person Speak.... - 8/31/2008 8:44:33 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TwilightShadows

As a sumbissive female, this question has been rolling around in my head for some time....

I wanted to respectfully ask as to why many people who self-identify as slaves refer to themselves only in the third person? As in "this slave is hungry, so this slave is going to go have a sandwich."

During the time Bob Dole was much in the media, Saturday Night Live did a spoof on him - all I recall is that he just said "Bib Dole diesn't need this!" (of course, mocking his compulsion to always refer to himself in the third person.)

This doesn't even touch on the whole pronoun bastardization some insist on. As a creative writer as a hobby, and a technical writer as part of my profession, the whole "W/we, "O/our" and gammatically incorrect capitalization or lack there of of pronouns makes me nuts.

Again, I mean no disrespect to anyone, but WTF? I just want to understand why this has such importance, beyond the notion that it implies respect.