RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (Full Version)

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MzDeadlyRed -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 4:58:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper

I think its common courtesy to wipe your own load off someone's chair.



That reminds me of something I heard from a Pro Domme friend once.  After a session she told the boy, 'Clean yourself up, but if you wipe your dick on my curtains I'll beat the Jesus out of you.'  I cracked up then, and I'm cracking up now.  Common courtesy indeed! LOL




malloves69 -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 12:57:16 PM)

love being feed my cum by my mistress one way or another [:)] if she allows me to cum inside of her after im done she sits on my face until i lick her clean [:)] and yes i do swallow it all ...or if she milks my prostate most times she will milk it into a glass or cup and then feed it back to me ..one creampie or snowball to go please [:)]she says she takes it from me one way or another and feeds it back to me until next time we play [:)] love watching it drip from her into my mouth that can be pretty erotic to share [:)] usually the last thing we do together before shower time is a golden shower ..love watching it cum from her and yes i try and swallow as much as i can [:)] then we shower together to get nice and clean ..then our hugs before she goes ..she is a amazing woman ..love our times together [:)] mal




subexploring -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 1:15:42 PM)

I sense a subtext in the original question, that the OP is struck by how dommes leave their dominance behind the instant he comes, and that makes him feel there's an element of falseness to the whole thing. Being made to act submissively after coming might help make him feel like the domme is "really" dominant as opposed to just doing it for the session. But you know, he has to negotiate for that.

Not into pros myself, personally.




Lynnxz -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 1:39:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subexploring

I sense a subtext in the original question, that the OP is struck by how dommes leave their dominance behind the instant he comes, and that makes him feel there's an element of falseness to the whole thing. Being made to act submissively after coming might help make him feel like the domme is "really" dominant as opposed to just doing it for the session. But you know, he has to negotiate for that.

Not into pros myself, personally.


Good in theory, but you must remember lots of men are socially inept at the domme's house, and would fail to realize that the session was over.




LarTric -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 4:56:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subexploring

I sense a subtext in the original question, that the OP is struck by how dommes leave their dominance behind the instant he comes, and that makes him feel there's an element of falseness to the whole thing. Being made to act submissively after coming might help make him feel like the domme is "really" dominant as opposed to just doing it for the session. But you know, he has to negotiate for that.

Not into pros myself, personally.


I hadn't thought about it that way, but now that you mention it, that is a very insightful point. You're probably right.

By the way, why does the session have to end at the climax? Why not stay in character until he's completely gone?




LadyHibiscus -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 5:28:12 PM)

I'm not sure what you mean by "in character".  If I was doing a roleplay session, phasing out of our fantasy roles was a part of aftercare, and making sure that his headspace was okay for getting in a car and driving.  If it was just a play session, well I am myself all the time, and I didn't change out of my costume until after he left.  It seems rude and counterproductive to kick him out the door right after playing.




asiandominatrix -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 6:06:01 PM)

I have had slaves request being 'forced' to eat their own ejaculate - I think one of the reasons that you haven't been made to do that in a professional session is because you didn't ask.

I'm not sure if the other Pro-Dommes will agree with me on this one, but in paid sessions, I don't do anything that my client hasn't asked for beforehand when we negotiated the session. And if I feel he's trying new things, and doesn't really know what he wants, but seems to enjoy a certain 'theme', I will gauge how comfortable he is with certain activities (all the while remaining in character, of course). Also, I keep in mind that many subs enjoy the idea of doing something, but will not necessarily appreciate doing it in reality, because in reality, all the tastes, smells and sensations. This is also true with golden showers.

All in all, I suppose with pro sessions, you are paying to tailor your session - so unless you mention something in one way or another, many Mistresses will assume that it's not part of what you want.




LarTric -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 8:50:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: asiandominatrix

I'm not sure if the other Pro-Dommes will agree with me on this one, but in paid sessions, I don't do anything that my client hasn't asked for beforehand when we negotiated the session.


Wow. With all due respect, that is 100.00% the opposite of what you should be doing. A huge percentage of the fun for a sub is the anticipation of what a Domme will do next, the anticipation, the excitement. Creatively pushing limits, doing things specifically because she's into it, because she wants to - that is the turn on.

Acting out a pre-arranged check list sounds absolutely horrible.

You mentioned golden showers - that's something I specifically do not like and would never request however if a Domme "forced" me to do because that was a huge turn on for her, then it would a lot of fun to do in a session.

You really missed the boat on this one.




Coupleofwhats -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 9:26:33 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LarTric

quote:

ORIGINAL: asiandominatrix

I'm not sure if the other Pro-Dommes will agree with me on this one, but in paid sessions, I don't do anything that my client hasn't asked for beforehand when we negotiated the session.


Wow. With all due respect, that is 100.00% the opposite of what you should be doing. A huge percentage of the fun for a sub is the anticipation of what a Domme will do next, the anticipation, the excitement. Creatively pushing limits, doing things specifically because she's into it, because she wants to - that is the turn on.

Acting out a pre-arranged check list sounds absolutely horrible.

You mentioned golden showers - that's something I specifically do not like and would never request however if a Domme "forced" me to do because that was a huge turn on for her, then it would a lot of fun to do in a session.

You really missed the boat on this one.


Asiandominatrix, acoording to her profile, works as a professional in a house of domination. As a former "housegirl" myself, I can vouch for the fact that most guys want pre-scripted sessions. Many of them have one fantasy that they act out over and over with different women.

In order to get to sessions that involve you actually taking control, you have to change your business model and practices. It's really a matter of personal taste. I know women who have worked for houses for years and are fine with that. And I know women who barely lasted a week in a house setting, and have been on their own from almost day one. To each their own, eh?




MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 9:46:47 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LarTric

By clean up duty, I meant where the sub would be ordered to lick up his mess. ......

It's like the climax officially ends the playtime.




I am not a pro-domme but a friend of mine who is told me clients usually safe word rather than eat their own cum after climax.  Its a hot fantasy, but once the man has come, he is not feeling too submissive anymore. 

That might also be why your pro-dommes seem to "come out" of role - they sense that as fast as you cum, you have too.




Lynnxz -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 10:41:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LarTric



Wow. With all due respect, that is 100.00% the opposite of what you should be doing. A huge percentage of the fun for a sub is the anticipation of what a Domme will do next, the anticipation, the excitement. Creatively pushing limits, doing things specifically because she's into it, because she wants to - that is the turn on.

Acting out a pre-arranged check list sounds absolutely horrible.

You mentioned golden showers - that's something I specifically do not like and would never request however if a Domme "forced" me to do because that was a huge turn on for her, then it would a lot of fun to do in a session.

You really missed the boat on this one.


Trust me- a lot of guys come with the whole script that they want... I want to do this for 5 minutes, this for 10 minutes, tie me up this way for 3 three minutes.....




subexploring -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/3/2008 11:50:00 PM)

I'm finding this a very interesting conversation. The reasons dommes are giving as to why sessions are "scripted" make a lot of practical sense. It's especially interesting to hear that many/most men want their sessions rigidly scripted.

For me, pre-scripted sessions are a total turnoff and being under the true, unpredictable control of the domme is the whole point of the thing. (Although I'll admit that in my fantasies, the domme's "unpredictable" kinks are magically pretty similar to my favorite ones -- hey, it's a fantasy). I just can't get into it when I feel like I'm actually the one in control.

But in part for that very reason, I haven't gotten into pro dommes. It feels like it would be very difficult to create that in a pro session -- real control involves a much higher level of mutual committment and trust. (Not that it's impossible, I guess anything's possible, but certainly it would be hard).




malloves69 -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/4/2008 1:44:49 AM)

when a sub is paying a pro dom it should be geared to what he wants to a certain degree shouldnt it ? [:)]then if the lady is playfull and creative she can push certain limits and put in some of her desires too [:)] thats what makes it fun and not old and boring i think [:)] and if the chemistry is there between the 2 people it can be magical indeed [:)] i would think a 24/7 relationship would be different to some degree more her stuff and not so much about the sub but hey that can be fun too i think [:)] have fun ..mal [:)]




MsStarlett -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/4/2008 3:58:57 AM)

quote:

A huge percentage of the fun for a sub is the anticipation of what a Domme will do next, the anticipation, the excitement.


Sounds like what CoupleofWhat's said... if that's what you want, then ASK for it up front.  Set your boundaries then ask the Lady to 'surprise' you.




azjojoba -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/4/2008 4:42:40 AM)

That's been my experience. I think it means they care enough for you to cum, but they don't care about you pleazing them. It's a one sided relationship in a lot of respects. 




Politesub53 -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/4/2008 3:09:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LarTric

Wow. With all due respect, that is 100.00% the opposite of what you should be doing. A huge percentage of the fun for a sub is the anticipation of what a Domme will do next, the anticipation, the excitement. Creatively pushing limits, doing things specifically because she's into it, because she wants to - that is the turn on.

Acting out a pre-arranged check list sounds absolutely horrible.

You mentioned golden showers - that's something I specifically do not like and would never request however if a Domme "forced" me to do because that was a huge turn on for her, then it would a lot of fun to do in a session.

You really missed the boat on this one.


How patronising can you get ?  Just becuase someone doesn`t like doing things the one twue way, dosent mean they are wrong. Maybe it`s you who are 100% wrong.

For the record, i agree that not knowing what will happen next is a huge turn on, but some guys will have a set fantasy scripted from the start.




AAkasha -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/5/2008 11:07:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsCfromMelbourne

quote:

ORIGINAL: LarTric

By clean up duty, I meant where the sub would be ordered to lick up his mess. ......

It's like the climax officially ends the playtime.




I am not a pro-domme but a friend of mine who is told me clients usually safe word rather than eat their own cum after climax.  Its a hot fantasy, but once the man has come, he is not feeling too submissive anymore. 

That might also be why your pro-dommes seem to "come out" of role - they sense that as fast as you cum, you have too.



Many (most?) submissive men have a huge drop in their ability to submit after they cum. Not ALL submissives. However, their ability to continue to submit, in my experience, is directly related to how much emotional investment they have in their relationship with the domina.  In a pro situation, there is probably very little.  So she can expect that once he cums, his ability to follow commands will be limited. 

Getting a man to clean up his own cum takes some preparation if he is new to the act - ie, maknig him cum directly into his own mouth, or using saved cum from a previous encounter and making him eat it.  I think most femdoms, both pros and non-pros, are fully aware of a man's eagerness to eat his own cum prior to orgasm, and his total ambivalence about the act after cumming.

Akasha




TwoNYCDommes -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/5/2008 12:16:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subexploring
I'm finding this a very interesting conversation.

Me too.

quote:

ORIGINAL: subexploring
The reasons dommes are giving as to why sessions are "scripted" make a lot of practical sense. It's especially interesting to hear that many/most men want their sessions rigidly scripted.

It is, particularly since, as a non-pro, I've never had a sub mention anything like that.  In fact, the most common response I get if I ask questions to get a sense of what sorts of things one of my playmates likes is something along the lines of "whatever pleases you."

I wonder if men who have scripts and just want specific fantasies acted out are more likely to go to pros (since non-pros are unlikely to give them what they want), while those who want to submit to whatever unpredicatable things the dom wants are more satisfied in non-pro relationships.
Or is it that men simply feel free to give scripts to a pro they are paying for a service, but don't mention them to non-pros because they would expect them to be turned off by that?

quote:

ORIGINAL: subexploring
For me, pre-scripted sessions are a total turnoff and being under the true, unpredictable control of the domme is the whole point of the thing. (Although I'll admit that in my fantasies, the domme's "unpredictable" kinks are magically pretty similar to my favorite ones -- hey, it's a fantasy). I just can't get into it when I feel like I'm actually the one in control.

I have noticed that on occasion, of course.  It seems only natural for many (most?) subs to secretly hope that the things I do or require of them will turn out to be exactly what they want--at least some of the time.



quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
Many (most?) submissive men have a huge drop in their ability to submit after they cum. 
I think most femdoms, both pros and non-pros, are fully aware of a man's eagerness to eat his own cum prior to orgasm, and his total ambivalence about the act after cumming.

I have never noticed either of these phenomena.




Misstoyou -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/5/2008 6:10:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: TwoNYCDommes


quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
Many (most?) submissive men have a huge drop in their ability to submit after they cum. 
I think most femdoms, both pros and non-pros, are fully aware of a man's eagerness to eat his own cum prior to orgasm, and his total ambivalence about the act after cumming.

I have never noticed either of these phenomena.


Nor have I with any of the submissive men I've been involved with... but perhaps I need a larger sample. [:D]




MistressAthenaX -> RE: The last few minutes of a professional session... (9/5/2008 8:08:47 PM)

Some subs are happy just to be allowed to cum at the end of a session :-)

Ok, smartass comment out of the way...  a very good point has been made in this thread as to the fine points of control within a session.  Personally, if a sub tells Me that eating his own cum is something that he finds exciting, then that is good info to have.  If a sub tries to negotiate with Me in advance to ensure that this will happen, I point out that he is pre-supposing that an orgasm will be allowed.  Yes, I am a pro - but orgasms are still a reward! 

Depending on how much communication you have with a Domina prior to a session, I would recommend sharing your thoughts on this in an email ("the idea of being forced to eat My cum is very exciting to me), but in a non-pushy way.

It is very useful for Me when a sub communicates things that have been enjoyed about previous sessions, things that were not enjoyed in previous sessions, as well as some things that they hope to experience at some point as they move forward in their training.   Personally, I don't enjoy scripted sessions.  However, these tidbits of information make it far easier to actually take control of a person!  Yes, My sessions do include activities that the sub will enjoy, but I make it a priority to also make it clear who is in control, as the strong realization that they are not in control is often the most important thing for My subs. 




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