Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old...


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/2/2008 2:01:42 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
Urban Legend or real application? My source claims this not only was an actual job application, but says the guy was hired somewhere in California. Meeting him may be the only ligitimate reason to want to shop at Wal Mart.

Below is an actual job application that this 75 year old senior citizen submitted to Walmart in California. They hired him because he was funny.....
 
NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy Old Bastard) SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least one who will cooperate) DESIRED POSITION: Company President or Vice President. But seriously,whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle. EDUCATION: Yes. LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility. PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes. REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked. HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any. PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here? DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOUFROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs.?: Of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be 'Do you have a car that runs?' HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I mayalready be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they tell me. DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no! On my breaks - yes! WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?:Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually,I'd like to be doing that now. NEAREST RELATIVE: 7 miles DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BESTOF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Oh yes, absolutely.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/2/2008 2:09:06 PM   
lilmissdefiant


Posts: 666
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline
lol I like it

_____________________________

Change what you can and accept what you can't.
He came to me one night. Explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! When satisfied, he left & I was hurt!!... Fu*king mosquito!

Resident Thread Killer

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/2/2008 6:54:30 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
lol I've always wanted to fill out an app in that manner!

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/3/2008 12:42:25 AM   
JulieorSarah


Posts: 552
Joined: 8/25/2007
Status: offline
i went looking to see if it was urban myth .. my quick search shows it goes back to March this year ... i'd like to think it's true and couldn't find anything to the contrary ... i want to be like him ... some say i already am!

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/3/2008 7:59:10 AM   
Termyn8or


Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline
I remember a related one, older and not as elaborate.

On a job application :

[Have you ever been arrested ?]
No.
[Why]
Never got caught.

T

(in reply to JulieorSarah)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/3/2008 10:56:55 AM   
maskedsow


Posts: 137
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline
i think its urban legend im afraid coz i saw the same application posted but for a mcdonalds job

_____________________________




(in reply to Termyn8or)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/3/2008 12:18:53 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Termyn8or

I remember a related one, older and not as elaborate.

On a job application :

[Have you ever been arrested ?]
No.
[Why]
Never got caught.

T


ok...this almost made me swallow my gum...


_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to Termyn8or)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/3/2008 1:34:03 PM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline
I wanna  grow up to be him

Oh wait..I did

poenkitten

(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... - 9/4/2008 5:29:21 AM   
VadFarkas


Posts: 923
Joined: 6/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
They hired him because he was funny.....


Well Wal-Mart also has a sense of humor.
To see, go to the Photo of the Day, but be warned, it will change tomorrow.

_____________________________

Vad Farkas ~ Ringsmith
See my collars & cuffs at
www.ringofsteel.net

(in reply to Mercnbeth)
Profile   Post #: 9
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> Wal Mart Hires a 75 year old... Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.063