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RE: Does anybody have an idea how i can get my wife - 12/24/2005 9:25:14 PM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

>No, you won't get your "real DOM" if that's what you want -- because it does not exist. It's an ideal portrayed in male porn, written for men and produced by men FOR men.<

On this point we disagree, at least sort of. To me, a REAL DOM is a person who has felt the urge to dominate and control, felt the sexual excitement of punishing another, early on in her life. The desire and orientation is natural, it is inbred, and it is something she just needs to follow and develop. I basically see it the same as sexual orientation.

I agree that F's can learn to try out new roles and play around, be more authoritative, etc.... but I don't see that as true FEM DOM. I see that more as someone who is bi-curious. The can experiment with the other sex, but prefer one over the other. So, to me a bi-sexual man is a far cry from a homosexual man.

--cloudboy

(in reply to AAkasha)

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Post #: 21

RE: Does anybody have an idea how i can get my wife - 12/24/2005 10:03:02 PM

LadyJulieAnn

Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy
O, she knows about my desire for S&M, and she has clearly rejected it. She has no interest in it at all. She's found old pics of me cross dressed (something I used to be into), letters I've written to DOMs, and now she knows I have a Mistress. So, I'm well past the line of disclosure risks. The main connection my wife and I share is friendship, history, intellectual compatibility, and very congruous temperments.

A conversion tack as the one you suggested, I could maybe see playing with someone more early on in a relationship, but my wife and I now have almost 18 years of history between us. Needless to say, we are in quite a different spot.

Anyway, I knew what I was at a very, very early age. My Mistress was the same, she knew who she was at an early, early age. I like it best when people are in their natural roles, being what they always wanted to be. God does that make it really, really, really good when you can combine these two synergies.

I loved your response. It was more than inciteful.

--cloudboy

P.S. You can disagree with me anytime.

I am curious as to why you entered into a relationship that did not also fulfill your submissive tendencies if you knew your "natural role" at such an early age.

Be well,
Julie

(in reply to cloudboy)

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Post #: 22

RE: Does anybody have an idea how i can get my wife - 12/26/2005 7:32:13 AM

TexasMaam

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

--cloudboy

P.S. You can disagree with me anytime.

Reread my previous post in its entirety, and substitute helenaMTsub's name for your own, cloudboy.

TexasMaam

(in reply to cloudboy)

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Post #: 23

RE: Does anybody have an idea how i can get my wife - 12/28/2005 10:25:20 PM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

>I am curious as to why you entered into a relationship that did not also fulfill your submissive tendencies if you knew your "natural role" at such an early age. <

I think the answer lies somewhere between denial, boxing, and repression. Life doesn't offer one a ready made track for deviant behavior, so we try to fit in and play the roles that are both allowed and more accessible. If I had to say, this would be the salient theme of Brokeback mountain.

(in reply to LadyJulieAnn)

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Post #: 24