RE: Asking for too much?

RE: Asking for too much? (Full Version)

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girl4you2 -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/4/2005 8:52:50 PM)
i think that it's really very mature and brave of you to have not only faced a situation that was way over your head, compared to what you'd talked about before with this man, but also to have realized what happened and that it wasn't a good pairing for you. you started to realize this 3 days ago, and with time, you show increasing awareness as to why it was wrong and what it is that you need. i think you're doing fantasic in what you've come to know about yourself, so please do not think of yourself as stupid nor as ignorant. you've learned a great deal and to me seem very smart. go easy on you; you've done well and i hope that you will see this upon more time. i wish you well and i think you'll have a good go at it the next time. i'm honoured to share a thread with you.

Prunesquallor -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/5/2005 5:02:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PriapicBratt Prunesquallor, Excuse me but I did not put the blame on him. Before you start in on someone maybe you should have the facts. This was not someone I had just met and not someone I had not spent time talking to. As a matter of fact I even had him meet my safe call person. He himself has apoligized and admits he misled me. Yes I learned a valuable lesson as did he I hope. You accepted his collar. Such a thing should never be done unless you know the person inside out. By accepting his collar you are giving him total responsibility for your well-being. I'm not saying he wasn't at fault. What I am saying is that it is foolish in the extreme to accept a collar without having a pretty damn good idea of what kind of person he is. I hope that in future your choices will be better ones and that you find what you seek.

sweetpettjenny -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/5/2005 5:02:45 PM)
People do many things that they wouldn't allow when feelings come into play. Unfortunately Sometimes the other involved in the relationship doesn't recipricate. It happens to the best of us. Its happened to me and im a inteligent woman. quote: ORIGINAL: theRose4U quote: i think you are wrong James. Aftercare is done in most relationships , with the exception of pure sadists . Please don't generalize what you like , and expect that is normal for everyone. Jenny, hoping that you'll enlighten me on this one. Why would someone WILLINGLY allow themselves to be used and tossed aside like someone wiping dog poo off their shoe and call it a relationship? I'm all for diff strokes and the like but in my world I don't get it. I tell friends as a joke, "hey let me take your money & treat you like crap I'll at least still love you in the morning" when they have a girlfriend use them; but in my world I can't imagine someone willing to base their life & relationship on something like that upfront & willingly. Looking for insight.

PriapicBratt -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/5/2005 7:16:50 PM)
quote: i think that it's really very mature and brave of you to have not only faced a situation that was way over your head, compared to what you'd talked about before with this man, but also to have realized what happened and that it wasn't a good pairing for you. you started to realize this 3 days ago, and with time, you show increasing awareness as to why it was wrong and what it is that you need. i think you're doing fantasic in what you've come to know about yourself, so please do not think of yourself as stupid nor as ignorant. you've learned a great deal and to me seem very smart. go easy on you; you've done well and i hope that you will see this upon more time. i wish you well and i think you'll have a good go at it the next time. i'm honoured to share a thread with you. Thank you so much for your kind words....they were a smile much needed and appreciated. I too am honored by your thoughtful words.

Webmaster60 -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/5/2005 9:39:32 PM)
quote: I am very new at the lifestyle but have spent considerable time talking to and questioning people that are familiar with it. I recently accepted a collar.(I thought collars were for slaves? I am a Sub) After our first "session" I felt so empty and confused. To me it seemed more like being with a sadist. The "session" went fine but I need the care, passion, gentleness afterwards. Am I wrong in thinking the relationship should have both? I don't know what to do now. :::slapping head:::: I'm confused here... You've accepted a collar from someone and you didn't know how they "played"? Umm.. you did say you're new to I wont go totally nuts on you... Never mind.. Go NOW.. chain yourself at the hip to an EXPERIENCED slave, and do NOTHING without seeking her counsel and advise.

MasterRobert1 -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/6/2005 7:29:42 AM)
First lesson to be learned: always ask, even if the question, and answer, seem obvious. Everyone has their own ways of doing things. One observation. Don't be quiet so quick to accept a collar before you've really gotten to know someone. A short term contract would have better served in this situation. I'm old fashioned. A collar is PERMANENT (or at least should be). If you really don't know someone, well, do NOT accept a collar from them before getting to know them.

DelRey -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/9/2005 5:31:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slavejali Master has been known to pick flowers and give them to me, dance with me in the street and generally be very romantic and loving, he can also be demanding and make me hurt so good. Everyone has different ideals for a relationship, including Master/slave relationships. You need to find one that is right for you. slavejali is 100% right ! She gets it ! And I'm glad to hear there are other "fun/romantic" masters out there like my self. the only thing slavefali left out was (((( FEELINGS ARE NEVER WRONG !!!! )))) Think about it, live with it and when your feelings are telling you somthing. You'll be a much happier Pet.

MHOO314 -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/9/2005 6:18:17 AM)
My question is did you accept the collar before a session? If so, I guess I ask why as that may have been an early indication of things to come or not to come-- again I go back to expectations, what was discussed? Did the Master discuss aftercare? Did you say what you needed in the way of emotional support?

candystripper -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/9/2005 11:25:51 AM)
quote: I am very new at the lifestyle but have spent considerable time talking to and questioning people that are familiar with it. I recently accepted a collar.(I thought collars were for slaves? I am a Sub) After our first "session" I felt so empty and confused. To me it seemed more like being with a sadist. The "session" went fine but I need the care, passion, gentleness afterwards. Am I wrong in thinking the relationship should have both? I don't know what to do now. PriapicBratt It says in my profile that i am not interested in Sadistic Men. Nevertheless, They email me, and swear They will give up s & m for me. i know bulls**t when i hear it; once in Their collar, They'd demand s & m activiies from me, and i'd be forced to return the collar. It sounds as if such a thing has happened to you. My advice is leave now; it cannot get better. candystripper

amayos -> RE: Asking for too much? (12/9/2005 11:55:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fastlane I love that song "I heard it through the grapvine." Of course, unless you hear it from the source it is nothing but jealousie's and sour grapes. Think about it. Hmmm, an interesting point.

MstrTiger -> RE: Asking for too much? (1/22/2006 8:59:29 PM)
A relationship should be whatever you want it to be, you just have to find the correct person to be in it with, the person you are with at the moment is clearly not giving you what you want.

Petruchio -> RE: Asking for too much? (1/23/2006 10:39:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PriapicBratt I am very new at the lifestyle but have spent considerable time talking to and questioning people that are familiar with it. I recently accepted a collar.(I thought collars were for slaves? I am a Sub) After our first "session" I felt so empty and confused. To me it seemed more like being with a sadist. The "session" went fine but I need the care, passion, gentleness afterwards. Am I wrong in thinking the relationship should have both? I don't know what to do now. I came late to this thread and people have made good points. It does seem clear that your dom/master/whatever IS sadistic.

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