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So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/1/2005 9:04:48 PM   
streetjacker


Posts: 4
Joined: 11/22/2005
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Hello all -

I joined this site along with alt.com and adultfriendfinder.com a few weeks ago and filled out my profiles pretty thoroughly (okay, I'm still working on this one). I'm not pushy and have been very polite in my 25+ PM's of interest I've sent out on these others sites. So far, aside from one polite refusal - which I TOTALLY appreciate - no one's responded. People are reading my letters but are not responding.

Please don't misunderstand: as an average-looking man I fully expect it to be very difficult to meet a woman (in particular) for sex play online, and I fully expect non-sexual, social interaction before anything leads to anything else (if at all). And I also understand how many messages are sent to online women from horny men that want to play. But still, almost 30 notes to women / couples specifically looking for single men that meet my description, and in a week not a single response?

Can someone tell me if I should expect 100 notes to go out before I reach someone that is sincerely interested in meeting? If that's the general case I'll grin and bear it and continue sending notes. But if I'm just being shut out because I exude "noobie"-ness, I guess I should re-subscribe in a few years when I've become more experienced, but then I probably won't be looking for a partner, will I?

Okay, got that off my chest. I'm not annoyed, just confused and hoping to meet some interesting minds & bodies soon.

- Streetjacker
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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/1/2005 9:10:48 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline
Message someone that interest you. If you get a reply then send another. Keep that up and add yourselves to IM. Chat for a bit to know each other even more. Don't forget to web cam and send pics. Before you know it, you'll be talking on the phone and then setting each other to meet at a public place. After that, best of luck.

Just remember that back in his day, Babe Ruth may have had the most home runs, but he also had the record for the most strike outs. He didn't give up swinging nor should you. It may take time but sooner or later you will be with someone who you like and who likes you as well.

There ya have it

_____________________________

I'm Godzilla and you're Japan

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/1/2005 9:15:40 PM   
girl4you2


Posts: 1622
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline
hi,
welcome to collarme. your profile looks pretty good (do you really wish to be "broken" though?), and well thought out. there is a huge amount of mail women get on here (and any other site i've heard), so a low ratio of emails to sends is to be expected. someone else can provide you to a link of common things to put in an introductory email that i can't access right now on this computer. things do also take time, so don't lose faith. you live in the valley, and there are events in that area i believe, as well. don't limit yourself to strictly online and you will increase your chances immeasureably. hang in there and have some patience.

i wish you well.

_____________________________

maireann croí éadrom i bhfad. is maith an scáthán súil charad. is leor nod don eolach.
got shoes?

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/1/2005 9:30:30 PM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

Please don't misunderstand: as an average-looking man I fully expect it to be very difficult to meet a woman (in particular) for sex play online,



that's just it collarme.com is not a sex personalls most here are not looking for gratitious sex, Alt.com aint a sex site either. All though it's mostly men looking for sex.


AFF tho is a swingers /sex site but it's mostly horny men who have no manners/


When I see people who are clearly after sex even if they expect some period of non sexualness at first I am notinterested at all.

They could be adonis, they could be eeinstien, they could be good lord pooh bah if they're looking for sex I am not interested in anyway shape or form .


< Message edited by FelinePersuasion -- 12/1/2005 9:38:45 PM >

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/2/2005 2:07:20 AM   
FelinePersuasion


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Joined: 11/20/2004
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And also if you posted a better picture with a friendly smile it might help you look less, average, as you used the term

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/2/2005 7:27:21 AM   
boltaction


Posts: 53
Joined: 12/1/2005
Status: offline
I dont show a pic because I dont want to be recognized... it would have consequences.

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/2/2005 8:34:57 AM   
AbstractSavant


Posts: 149
Joined: 6/5/2005
Status: offline
Soul raping?

Oh dear.

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/2/2005 9:10:50 AM   
Rassitter


Posts: 35
Joined: 11/6/2005
Status: offline
I think your best chance would be to be active on the boards. (I am new, so have not been doing a whole lot of that myself, more lurking for now, but slowly getting a few post in) Join the chats and get to know others and give other an opertunity to get to know you.

I dont think sending out mass emails to women saying "hey I saw your profile" would work for a guy. The women probably get so many a day that it turns their stomach by now. I think if you are active and peopel get to know you, and they like what they see, they will contact you. Anyone can say anything in a profile, it is more actions that prove your personality. Also, if you notice you are forming some chemistry with someone while posting, then you are at least contacting her with some history as opposed to out of the blue.

You must be patient, it is a very important trait in both a Dom and a sub.

(in reply to AbstractSavant)
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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/2/2005 12:35:07 PM   
denika


Posts: 619
Joined: 8/30/2005
Status: offline
Hi,
I am a newbie as well, too the lifestyle, too collarme, too yams *G* I have to admit I have received some rather intresting, bordering on scary emails. The best peice of advice I can pass on is read the profiles carefully before emailing to make sure they are looking for what you offer, another thing is to try and be active in your community. I didn't even know there was a community until I reached out and that is when I met my Top and his girls after being invited out to a public play party, by a generous Master and His girl who reached out to me. That was eight months ago, and I have never been so happy and bruised *eg* Trust me, it's there if you look. There are alot more submissives/bottoms/slave/kajirans-pick your terms. Out there than there are Tops/Dom/Me/Master's. But they are out there. Don't settle and don't give up. A Dominant will respect you more if you don't compramise your individuality for theirs.


denika

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/2/2005 12:38:18 PM   
MsIncognito


Posts: 742
Joined: 5/24/2005
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I highly recommend that you stop playing the numbers game (i.e. if I send out 100 emails I can expect to get 20 responses) and start playing the human game. Don't try to hit as many woman as possible, instead only email the ones that really capture your attention somehow and spend a little more time crafting an email to each one.

< Message edited by MsIncognito -- 12/2/2005 12:41:06 PM >

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RE: So, How Do I Meet Someone? - 12/2/2005 2:39:14 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsIncognito

I highly recommend that you stop playing the numbers game (i.e. if I send out 100 emails I can expect to get 20 responses) and start playing the human game. Don't try to hit as many woman as possible, instead only email the ones that really capture your attention somehow and spend a little more time crafting an email to each one.


That is the best online dating advice you are going to get.

- LA


_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

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