Worldly1 -> RE: Why do I have to pay attention? (9/27/2008 8:45:51 AM)
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ORIGINAL: lally3 oh good lord and you call yourself Worldly!!! since when did being collared and asking for advice from other Doms become outlawed. lally3 - I would have responded to you privately, with respect, but I could not find your profile. We all come from different backgrounds, and our perspective is shaped by those backgrounds and what we have been taught. I have attended several international bdsm conferences, and have been a presenter at some, and I believe that I am perhaps a bit more worldly than a few people, and not nearly as worldly as many others. My advice is never correct, except for me. Other people's advice is also not correct, except for themselves. We all have the right to express ourselves, ideally without fear of being attacked personally for our views. All of us have the ability to sift through the many opinions and perhaps learn something, if only what we would or should not do. I was brought up in the bdsm lifestyle by old guard leathermen, where honor and integrity is stressed above everything else. In that environment, for a collared submissive or slave to openly challenge his or her Domininant is not acceptable behavior. The choices are either submit and obey, or work it out, or remove the collar and leave. The choice is not there to seek advice from a group of total strangers. For example, I was taught that it's ok to disagree, but it's not ok to be disagreeable. I was taught that it's ok to disagree with someone's opinion, but it's not ok to criticize or attach the person who expressed it. I was also taught that you never say anything about someone that you would not say to their face. If I had a problem with advice I received from my Mentor, it remained between the two of us and we resolved it ourselves. Yes, it is quite possible that this girl has her Dom's permission to seek advice elsewhere. However, without knowing this for sure (she hasn't said), I can not imagine many Doms telling their collared submissive that if he or she disagrees with an instruction, that they are free to go to strangers in a public forum and ask for their opinions. My opinion on this question stems from my background and training. You may have a different background, and I respect both you and your right to disgree with me. I merely ask you to confine your disagreement to the view that is expressed. Thank you for the opportunity to express my opinion again. Respectfully, W1
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