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online contract - 9/29/2008 7:08:48 PM   
hereyesruponyou


Posts: 770
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I am looking for a "slave contract" for a relationship that will be primarily online for some time. Perhaps meeting 3-4 times a year.

Thanks in advance if anyone has a suggestion of where to look or is willing to share

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RE: online contract - 9/29/2008 7:46:19 PM   
Lockit


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Not sure I would ever have a contract with an online submissive. lol  Sounds like a whole lot of time to devote to a meeting a few times a year.  You might want to find the dominant that is willing to do this before you plan a contract.

Okay I need to correct this.  You are a dominant... well... I don't know how to help you on this one.  I have never seen an online contract.  But your profile says you don't do online... so marked me confused. lol  Sorry

< Message edited by Lockit -- 9/29/2008 7:49:38 PM >

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RE: online contract - 9/29/2008 8:02:08 PM   
hereyesruponyou


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I know, but he worked his way under my skin as a friend first.  Reality says meetings may be limited, but i am willing to try this. We both share an interest in Chastity so that will have to be a big part of this. I am not sure it's even possible, but i going to try because i care. Weird huh?

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RE: online contract - 9/29/2008 8:38:27 PM   
Lockit


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LOL Anything is possible!  Do what feels good!

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RE: online contract - 9/29/2008 9:05:34 PM   
MissSCD


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Although this will probably not work, my feelings are you are going to do it anyways.  You will need to modify your contract of choice to include Online training.
 
Regards, MissSCD
http://www.milism.net/contract.htm

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RE: online contract - 9/30/2008 12:46:53 AM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
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OP, good luck with that. 

Feel your way. Have FUN! ... If YOU want to....

To me, all the fun is in making my own way. I am the owner of my slave, after all. Why would I want to go by someone else's rules? Why would you?

The basic difficulty of a contract for online is its enforceability, or lack thereof. You will in effect be taxing your slave's honesty, if you truly punish (not "funish") his disobedience. Such an arrangement will tend to promote his dishonesty; a trait which presumably you do not want to develop or promote in him at all.

In other words a D/s online slave contract may tend to produce the exact opposite of the desired result, so that you may defeat your own purpose by employing it.
Why not just trust him to be obedient? Make your expectations clear, but don't expect to be able to enforce your standards of discipline from afar.

< Message edited by dreamerdreaming -- 9/30/2008 12:55:11 AM >


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RE: online contract - 9/30/2008 1:16:00 PM   
sfdrew


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quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

OP, good luck with that. 

Feel your way. Have FUN! ... If YOU want to....

To me, all the fun is in making my own way. I am the owner of my slave, after all. Why would I want to go by someone else's rules? Why would you?

The basic difficulty of a contract for online is its enforceability, or lack thereof. You will in effect be taxing your slave's honesty, if you truly punish (not "funish") his disobedience. Such an arrangement will tend to promote his dishonesty; a trait which presumably you do not want to develop or promote in him at all.

In other words a D/s online slave contract may tend to produce the exact opposite of the desired result, so that you may defeat your own purpose by employing it.
Why not just trust him to be obedient? Make your expectations clear, but don't expect to be able to enforce your standards of discipline from afar.


I think you are absolutely right about this. A contract will only work if he is honest and there is no way to know that. If you are going to do this (and it could be fun), I would suggest allowing him to admit to defaulting on the contract without fear of reprisal. If he thinks he is going to get a real punishment he may hide his bad behavior from you and over time that will foster a lot of distrust that wouldn't have been there otherwise, and if you make the punishments fun then he will claim to have broken the rules just to get rewarded which is just as dishonest.

I would make things you can't check on optional and instead of punishments just tell him how disappointed you are. The things you can check on the other hand I would punish very severely for violating, and nothing makes a harsher punishment for long distance than extended periods of silence. An example of how this might work is given below.

"You must call every night and tell me what you had to eat so I can monitor your diet."

If he breaks his diet, tell him how disappointed you are that he doesn't have the motivation to fulfill his promises.

If he fails to call on the other hand, then punish him by not speaking to him for three days.



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RE: online contract - 9/30/2008 9:39:59 PM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
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sfdrew, thank you for elaborating on my main points.

Not to jack the thread, but I read your profile, and the last page or so of your journal. WOW. I'll go back and read the rest when I have time. That's good stuff!

The thing about online is that any contact at all would be precious, so I'd never go for days without contact. But that's just me. I'm so into my slaveboy it would be too much for me to bear.

Re: diet: yes that is a good idea. Myself, I have my boy keep a written record of his diet and exercise, and when we're apart he emails it to me each day. You are correct that my  disappointment alone, or even the prospect of it is abhorrent to him so he is very good for me, just in general.
I focus on staying positive about his diet/exercise program since I know how much effort is involved in it. And I do let him know how much it means to me, that he is obedient for me even when we're apart.






_____________________________

Download SLAVE LOVER. Explicit BDSM porn, with a plot! A love story, on a FemDom planet! http://www.amazon.com/Slave-Lover-Chronicles-Book-ebook/dp/B0031ERBLI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1261973416&sr=1

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