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Most confused - 10/3/2008 11:09:57 AM   
sabirah


Posts: 97
Status: offline 		I must ask others, as I am most confused.
I was talking with a man who claims to be dominant, we got on the subject of marriage.  ( Is this how most Masters' feel ? )
he says
" But really, shouldn't the slave be the one that gets down on one knee and asks?"


_____________________________

sincerely,
sabirah

The room is silent, absolutely silent, except for the decisive click of the collar lock.
It is a sound the girl will never forget.




Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 11:16:53 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Usually a man makes a proposal of marriage; but it's not unheard of for a woman to propose.  Some would even go as far as to say that property is not marriageable.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 11:18:21 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		It comes from the belief of some Masters that a slave must beg for a collar or a place in the Masters life.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 11:27:10 AM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Very simple answer. I married my girl. I Proposed and I made it very special. she said yes. andi sees me as being Dominant and didn't think me any less for have asked her.

The Less Simple Answer

Truth be told I am for the old fashioned, I believe that when a guy asks a girl on a date he should pick her up and pay. I don't feel comfortable being paid for so I tend not to LET people pay for me the the extent that I have prepaid for meals paying $100.00 up front what ever is left will be a tip just so that there is no check to fight over.

When it comes to Marriage the only thing I have that comes into the D/s Realm is that I believe in the sanctity of Marriage. I believe that ones should only marry for Love, if you do not love your slave then why marry them? Sure I know all the excuses like Death and Taxes and Medical but there are ways around doing them only in marriage they are a LITTLE more expensive but if you shop around they are more legally binding than marriage anyway.

Marriage is about love and love does not dictate what is right and wrong only with what is precieved as right and wrong to the individual at the time. I don't know anyone who would be serious about marriage that would care who did the asking as long as the question was asked.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to KatyLied)
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RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 11:30:00 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		fast reply

what's so confusing?  some dominants are marriage-minded and others are not. that's my simple answer

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
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RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 2:14:36 PM   
littlemisssnarf


Posts: 85
Joined: 8/28/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

It comes from the belief of some Masters that a slave must beg for a collar or a place in the Masters life.


Agreed!

you haven't said whether this Man you were speaking to is your Master or not - if it is then go ask girl.... if it's not well i really wouldn't worry about it!

_____________________________

let the sun shine on your soul and smile...

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 4:40:15 PM   
tweedydaddy


Posts: 673
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		He's just playing hard to get

(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 7:08:41 PM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		or fear of commitment .. 

(in reply to tweedydaddy)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 8:03:25 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sabirah

I must ask others, as I am most confused.
I was talking with a man who claims to be dominant, we got on the subject of marriage.  ( Is this how most Masters' feel ? )
he says
" But really, shouldn't the slave be the one that gets down on one knee and asks?"



Sure why not.

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 8:36:25 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		He better make it clear to his partners in the future. I can see her giving up on the relationship because he hasn't proposed and him deciding to move on because she hasn't.

Myself, I feel that taking the risk of rejection, doing the pursuing, demonstrates more confidence, more aggression, more dominance. But that's just me and colored by my own fear of rejection.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to SailingBum)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 9:27:15 PM   
MarcEsadrian


Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sabirah
I must ask others, as I am most confused.
I was talking with a man who claims to be dominant, we got on the subject of marriage. ( Is this how most Masters' feel ? )
he says "But really, shouldn't the slave be the one that gets down on one knee and asks?"


If the man is a Master, it works perfectly well in my mind that whatever he wishes of his girl is right, and he certainly won't care one iota what anyone (no matter how familiar with "the lifestyle" they purport to be) on an internet message board thinks of his choices, and nor would she.

There is really nothing to be confused about at all where this matter is concerned, unless of course one holds stubbornly to traditional ideas, or views any form of D/s as ultimately a bedroom game between lovers.


(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Most confused - 10/3/2008 10:32:33 PM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sabirah

I must ask others, as I am most confused.
I was talking with a man who claims to be dominant,
We have to take and long breath and read what she wrote....she is talking to a man who claims to be dominant..
Are we already assuming they are a couple with some sort of committment and knowledge of how their dynamic works? 

we got on the subject of marriage.  ( Is this how most Masters' feel ? )  We spoke of marriage...the subject.  What we each thought of it.  But never in a million years did I think the topic
w discussed had anything to do with him proposed that I get down on my knee and ask. Beg.

He is the man, a dominant man and if my Owner chooses to marry me, I hope he is the gentleman I know him to be and does the headship thing. 
he says
" But really, shouldn't the slave be the one that gets down on one knee and asks?"   For ownership or a collar maybe.
 
Some where on this thread the cart got way before the horse's ass.



(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Most confused - 10/4/2008 6:16:04 PM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline 		And your question is?

(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Most confused - 10/4/2008 8:13:11 PM   
ApathyRomance


Posts: 106
Joined: 4/2/2008
Status: offline 		I would guess that most masters who want to be married would be perfectly fine with being the one that asks, since most societies that allow people to choose tell the men that's their job. 

I think it'd be perfect and adorable if a woman proposed to me someday.

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Most confused - 10/5/2008 1:08:43 AM   
masterforRT


Posts: 176
Joined: 5/16/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

And your question is?


I was going to ask the same thing! You beat me to it...

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Most confused - 10/5/2008 1:40:47 PM   
Bstardsbitch


Posts: 154
Joined: 11/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ApathyRomance

I would guess that most masters who want to be married would be perfectly fine with being the one that asks, since most societies that allow people to choose tell the men that's their job. 

I think it'd be perfect and adorable if a woman proposed to me someday.



That's exactly how Sir saw it when I proposed to Him.
I didn't propose because I am His slave or needed to beg a place in His life. I proposed because I love Him to bits lol
xx

(in reply to ApathyRomance)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Most confused - 10/5/2008 2:32:12 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sabirah

I must ask others, as I am most confused.
I was talking with a man who claims to be dominant, we got on the subject of marriage.  ( Is this how most Masters' feel ? )
he says
" But really, shouldn't the slave be the one that gets down on one knee and asks?"


If that is how he wants things to progress; then that's fine. You don't have to agree; you don't have to disagree....you just have to acknowledge that this is HIS way of doing things. It matters very little if other Dominants agree with it or not.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Most confused - 10/5/2008 7:57:20 PM   
silkenfire


Posts: 130
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline 		I figure,

Since he is making it clear that he finds it the slave's position to ask, then maybe he is making it clear that when the time is right, you should ask?

Different people have different opinions. Me, I never make a first move. Period. In any way. Meaning, if Master wants me to get down and beg for marriage, then he better plan on never marrying me, because I won't ever ask. I have a hard enough time asking for things I *need* (like time to do schoolwork!!)

Some people are happy remaining unmarried. Or maybe, he also takes the viewpoint of that while you're in slave-mode, you won't really say no to anything, so maybe he thinks that if he proposes it won't be quite "real" because you won't feel like it's really a choice. Who knows. That's all the dynamic of your relationship, and his choice. If he wants you to ask, and you don't want to ask, maybe the question never gets asked, and then the question is... is that ok with you?



(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Most confused - 10/5/2008 10:12:17 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sabirah

I must ask others, as I am most confused.
I was talking with a man who claims to be dominant, we got on the subject of marriage.  ( Is this how most Masters' feel ? )
he says
" But really, shouldn't the slave be the one that gets down on one knee and asks?"



I'll tell  you what.... I for one don't care if this is or is not how*most* Masters feel.  I would only care how a  *particular* Master feels about it.  Sounds like we know how this one feels about it.  that's good info.

well wishes,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to sabirah)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Most confused - 10/7/2008 12:33:13 PM   
sailorfrank


Posts: 127
Joined: 6/18/2008
Status: offline 		    In this day and age each to his own wants I think.  And I dont have a problem with a female asking me anything important.

My slave Honored me by asking me to be her Master.   Loving a Challenge, of course I accepted her and havent regretted it yet!   If in the future as what we have grows I may say Yes again?

Dont be foolish in not asking for what you truly want.   After all...."They who hesitate lose the most!"

(in reply to sunshinemiss)
Profile   Post #: 20
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