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Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 7:43:48 AM   
HotMistress22


Posts: 58
Joined: 3/23/2008
Status: offline 		I was recently reading somewhere about something and someone asked a question.

"Is FemDom becoming ordinary?"

What do you think?

HM

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 7:57:46 AM   
winoverme


Posts: 67
Joined: 3/26/2006
From: Montreal
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HotMistress22

I was recently reading somewhere about something and someone asked a question.

"Is FemDom becoming ordinary?"

What do you think?

HM

quote:

"Is FemDom becoming ordinary?"


Personally, i don't think so! I guess that as long as there will be passionate submissive around to worship and serve...Why should it becoming ordinary? I have an idea i hope will prove you wrong..And if a FemDom would just try to find the right subs and slave to worship her? If she would choose her subs accordingly to her inner desires? If a Domme has secret thoughts that create butterflies in her stomach, then i guess she'd feel excited to meet a sub or slave who has the ability to provide and relieve that need..No? Foe example, if i am willing to let a Domme degrade me to the extreme, perhaps will she get her kicks out of that? Well, just a thought i wanted to share..

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 7:57:51 AM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline 		It depends on what you mean by "normal." It's always been normal for me. I think it's all the other folk who are weird. 

I think we're gonna need more context about the situation. Lotta vaguery in the original post.

< Message edited by aidan -- 10/6/2008 7:58:34 AM >

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 8:29:20 AM   
kajirusilk


Posts: 49
Joined: 11/5/2006
Status: offline 		FemDoms can never be ordinary but i hope They become more prevalent

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 9:30:55 AM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		too mainstream and used in  mass media too waterd down in public image  maybe .. I saw a direct tv ad and a us-gov block your kids tv ad all that had a  Dominatrix  featured .also tv shows are  putting them in .csi etc .also many in  movies  just to gain a laugh .So in that respect Yeah i can see your  point .Are the real FemDommes  Mistress's , Dominatrix, Females in Top space that way ? NO  those are the people whith in community and for us that are also  in  community  Women can never become "ordinary". To me  Women in  that Top space are treasured  not mundaine .

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 9:43:01 AM   
PeonForHer


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Status: offline 		Amen to that. 

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 10:01:10 AM   
Steponme73


Posts: 552
Joined: 11/9/2007
Status: offline 		I don't think Femdom is becoming normal.  Now, I do think that it is becoming more known, maybe not more accepted, but more known.  I think there has always been a section of society that has had dominant women.  Women throughout the centuries have had lots of power and control...usually behind the scenes.
But as far as pure Femdom as outlined by the media...No.

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 10:47:24 AM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		Ordinary? I hope not. Has it always been there? Oh yes, but in the background. In fact many houses are female led and run it just is not advertised as much as the "male head of household".

~Lashra


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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 5:12:47 PM   
HotMistress22


Posts: 58
Joined: 3/23/2008
Status: offline 		Great answers everyone. 

I certainly hope that FemDom never becomes ordinary.  I agree that we are saturated with images of FemDom, some not so authentic, which could possibly tarnish the "image" in general.  Someone should make some good FemDom porn.  We could start there:)  Who's going to volunteer????

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/6/2008 5:54:35 PM   
MmeGigs


Posts: 706
Joined: 1/26/2008
Status: offline 		I suspect that it is slowly becoming more normal and ordinary, for exactly the reasons you and Steponme point out, and will become increasingly normal and ordinary.  In society generally, when it comes to sex women aren't expected to be passive receivers anymore - we're active participants, even aggessors.  Women have always had a lot of power in their households and behind the scenes, but feminism has been changing the way folks look at these things.  More women today, particularly the younger ones, aren't willing to stay in the background and pretend that they don't have that power.  More men, particularly the younger ones, don't feel the need to be perceived as in control when they're not.  Put those things together, and it's easy to see why someone would ask whether femdom is becoming more ordinary. 


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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 10:24:35 AM   
HotMistress22


Posts: 58
Joined: 3/23/2008
Status: offline 		Amen sister!!!

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 10:33:10 AM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline 		I think female dominance is becoming more common. I am both delighted that it is, and saddened that I was born a generation or two too early  ;-)

Cheers,

Sea

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 10:44:12 AM   
zakkan


Posts: 606
Joined: 4/15/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HotMistress22

Someone should make some good FemDom porn.  We could start there:)  Who's going to volunteer????





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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 12:41:33 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I suppose it's old hat here for lots of people - but what about Nancy Friday's Women on Top?   Friday seems to think that women are becoming a lot more dominant (though, to me, she used quite a loose definition of that word "dominant").  Behind the faces of many "ordinary" looking women, she seemed to be saying, was a dominant waiting to break out. 

Well, one can hope, I suppose.  

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 12:49:54 PM   
rookey


Posts: 100
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HotMistress22
"Is FemDom becoming ordinary?"

What do you think?


Define 'ordinary'.  Unsurprising, common-place, acceptable?

Generally speaking, the more media exposure something receives, the more the public become aware and accustomed to it over time.  More media exposure makes that something less unfamiliar and so more ordinary. 

I think there is a similar trend with femdom.  Media exposure made the notion of femdom more unsurprising to a wider public, they become more aware that it exists, so more ordinary in that sense at least.  As for more ordinary as in more acceptable is another matter.  Negative attitudes persist.  But I reckon that the realisation of how common-place it is, will make femdom more widely acceptable. 

According to some figures consensual SM is widely practised (at least 15% of the general population by Gloria Brame's estimation in Come Hither).  So if plenty of people are doing it and there are no problematic outcomes arising from it, where's the problem?   Why is Femdom bad?

If one cannot find good answers to such questions, then where is the basis for considering Femdom unacceptable other than one's own petty prejudices?  The absence of convincing answers to such questions makes it harder to buy into anti-femdom prejudices.  In other words, people realise that such prejudices are a load of horse manure.

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 1:10:31 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		So if plenty of people are doing it and there are no problematic outcomes arising from it, where's the problem?   Why is Femdom bad?
 
It's bad because it's a "perversion", rookey.  But it's also bad for a reason that isn't to do with the appropriateness or otherwise of certain kinds of sexual behaviour.  Homosexuality broke those rules, but it didn't break another rule that's even more fundamental.  This is to do with power.  It's just not considered logical or reasonable to give up power to someone else; correspondingly, it's self-evidently unfair to demand that someone else relinquish his/her power to you.  The more power one has, the better - that's the been the assumption since time immemorial. 

I found myself reaching this conclusion when I tried to put an advert in The Guardian (a very liberal broadsheet newspaper in the UK) for a dominant woman as a partner.  The paper carried adverts for gay men and women - but it wouldn't carry my advert nor any other that involved power exchanges. 

In some very basic and important way BDSM isn't reasonable.  We can accept that (or even try to dig to the deeper level and find reason in it) - but they can't.  Not yet, anyway.



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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 1:28:45 PM   
rookey


Posts: 100
Status: offline 		Though a liberal broad sheet, the Guardian still caters for a mainstream audience.  BDSM is not considered, as yet, mainstream.  It is considered by many as sexually deviant.  Homosexuality once suffered similar attitudes as well.

Attitudes change over time generally becoming more liberal.  Perhaps one day the Guardian will accept the sort of advert you attempted to submit.

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 1:50:57 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		That's just what I'm havering at, rookey.  BDSM goes to the root of what it means to be "liberal".  The whole idea is founded upon the belief that all people want as much power as they can get, therefore, a "liberal" way to run things will distribute that desire equally.  Liberals want people to be free - but the idea of BDSM contradicts their world view at its most fundamental level because their idea of "freedom" is, at root, too crude and simple.

Nonetheless, I think The Guardian has changed its position on BDSM-type lonely hearts ads now.  Not that I'd put an ad in there now, mind you - bunch of stuffed up, smug plonkers that its editors are.

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 3:27:22 PM   
tweedydaddy


Posts: 673
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		Only if the Domme is bored

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RE: Is FemDom becoming ordinary? - 10/7/2008 6:21:36 PM   
OneMoreWaste


Posts: 910
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline 		Not ordinary enough 
I have no desire to be "different"


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