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Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 9:50:33 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		I have been getting a stupid amount of mail. Every day I have been replying, deleting and sometimes laughing at the silly one liners.

I decided to put up a new main picture and to do that I deleted my old one. The new pic takes a few days (if approved) and low and behold all mail has ground to a halt!


My question is; How important is it for those dominants looking, to have an instant picture before deciding to make contact?


I get so many mails saying that they love  the way my mind works but they have obviously only bothered to read how my mind works once they have seen what I look like?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 10:03:01 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		Your mail ground to a halt because your profile doesn't pop up randomly on login unless you have a pic.  So you don't come to anyone's attention.


Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 10:05:07 AM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Simple Answer is if you are a bucked toothed slacked jawed Yokel then chancer are the physical attraction that motovates most men will not be there and no matter how many late night phone sex calls you have the Human as a Species is attracted to looks first.

We are Animals after all and if you look at the Animal Kingdom most creatures have a looks based breeding patern because looks show genes and teach what you should expect to see in your offspring.

Personally I only review Profiles with pictures. If you cannot put a face with the Profile I'm just not interested. Does this have me losing out on great people? I am sure it does but I have better things to do than wade through all the Liars and Men Posing as Women.

I also won't stay on Collar Me for long I want to take it to at very least Phone conversations with in a 2 week period because truth be told I hate answering e-mail it takes so much more time than asking a question on the phone.

But I am one of Many and I am sure you are to get a LOT of different answers on this.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 10:08:17 AM   
leadership527


Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline 		Not that I'm shopping now or ever expect to be, but if I was somehow looking for a mate in a place like this, I'd actually prefer to not see a picture right off the bat.  I'd rather get an unadulterated view of the real person first before any physical compatibility stuff gets into play.  I also contact LOTS of people here.  If I, for some wierd reason, decided to go looking for a submissive, it wouldn't be someone that I "found" as a result of searching.  It would be someone I already had an established relationship with who just happened to be compatible and available at the same time I was.  Physical chemistry is important, but not top on my list.

_____________________________

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I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 10:09:00 AM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline 		These are not dominants. The $300 PC has caused an avalanche of people to realize they can have an alternative pretense life online. They used to buy magazines, now they have sticky keyboards. You're better off without a picture, it'll give you a reasonable (though not guaranteed) security that whoever contacts you can read.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 10:17:41 AM   
AMaster


Posts: 814
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline 		The photo is not the first thing I check in a profile.   I read every profile that indicates one might be compatible with my needs.  While we all have preferences about physical appearance, I have never chosen a sub based on her looks.

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 10:20:42 AM   
VampiresLair


Posts: 1307
Joined: 9/3/2008
Status: offline 		The photo is not all that important. However, when you do not have a picture up, most of the time you do not show up on someone's list. They often have it set to photo only, and even if they do not the default profile to show up first is the first one on the list with a picture. No picture means less people are looking at your profile, if any at all. Not due to interest vs lack of interest, simply airtime.

DV


_____________________________

Separately we are DiurnalVampire and DVsFox

10/18 Wedding date. 1 year and still blissfully happy

10/13/10 3 year anniversary of his becoming my Fox

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(in reply to AMaster)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 10:47:34 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		Thanks for explaining how that works CalifChick and VamiresLair.

Whilst I agree with a lot of what you say Steel, it makes me wonder how all the little adverts in the papers love columns work as they never have pictures. I do put my hand up and admit that I am guilty of looking at pictures and that I am more likely to respond to a mail if I can see who Im replying to. Looks are not of the uppermost importance, though I do admit to meeting possibly the best looking English guy off this site last Saturday night and yes I did see his picture first!!! Luck had it that he turned out to be as depraved as me... well almost!!!

Leadership your wise. The best looking ones are normally the wide boys or the ones just wanting a quick in the panties job. I have had some incredibly intuitive emails from people with no pictures and I would always wish to remain in contact with people that can put so much thought into this.

Antipode... that could work both ways. Looks are important to some whilst to others it could mean very little. I would never put a full on face picture on a site like this because I have had the experience of the past coming back to haunt me.


Thats good to hear AMaster but fairly unusual I think

(in reply to VampiresLair)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 12:52:54 PM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

Simple Answer is if you are a bucked toothed slacked jawed Yokel then chancer are the physical attraction that motovates most men will not be there
Steel


Not that there's anything wrong with that...

_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 1:56:01 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		That's right and Cletus has to Marry Someone so who knows.

I say Shoot for the Moon.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to subtee)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 2:03:27 PM   
persephonee


Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline 		Hey Cleatus...will ya marry me?...*belch*

proposing perse

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And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/8/2008 2:44:35 PM   
tweedydaddy


Posts: 673
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline 		If your emails are often predominantly about how good you look, filter them out, you've identified the shallow ones first. lucky you.

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 7:42:10 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tweedydaddy

If your emails are often predominantly about how good you look, filter them out, you've identified the shallow ones first. lucky you.


Oh I know! especially the ones that immediately ask for a mug shot.

(in reply to tweedydaddy)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 7:50:15 AM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Well now that your new pictures have been approved I see what all the Fuss was about.

Dar'lin I would Chuck nearly 90% of your mail sadly most of them have no interest in anything above your chest line.

You are a very pretty girl and sadly most of the mail you are getting is based on nothing more than that.

Happy Hunting.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 7:54:42 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Well....considering I get guys that say, "I love your profile and everything it implies" when my profile has 5 words, "Just here for the forums".  I would say the wankers look at the pictures and don't read the profile at all.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 9:13:46 AM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz
I get so many mails saying that they love  the way my mind works but they have obviously only bothered to read how my mind works once they have seen what I look like?


Okay, now that your new pics are up, let me give you a little translation:

"I love how your mind works" means "thank you for putting up those pics that I can wank off to and imagine what it feels like to do you face down on the bed".


Cali


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to allthatjaz)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 12:33:40 PM   
WestBaySlave


Posts: 501
Joined: 9/24/2008
Status: offline 		  I feel a little conflicted about this. On one hand, I do get sick of people seeing the picture and not reading the rest ( which I know is hardly a phenomena unique to me ), on the other hand, I find that people without pictures tend to have a much higher chance of not actually existing in real life. There is a whole race of nameless, faceless people with nearly-empty profiles who write asking for more - ironically enough, often for more pictures - yet are unwilling to provide details as small as first name ( "I'm Sir to you for now," said one recent information-poor message ).

(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 12:35:56 PM   
WestBaySlave


Posts: 501
Joined: 9/24/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Well....considering I get guys that say, "I love your profile and everything it implies" when my profile has 5 words, "Just here for the forums".  I would say the wankers look at the pictures and don't read the profile at all.


Oh, you're just playing hard to get.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 1:00:32 PM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I'm not entirely sure why, if we are to be so directed towards seeking emotional, intellectual and dynamic ideals in others to gauge whether we wish to be involved with them that, somehow, physical attraction should be more forsaken. I don't agree with the subtle implication that seems to pervade (I'm speaking in general, not to anyone specifically) that physical attraction somehow directly translates to being superficial. It's a crucial part of a relationship dynamic and deserves as much attention as the rest of the pie pieces.

Also concerning profiles, this day in age there is basically no excuse not to have an image. If you don't have a camera you surely must have a webcam. If you don't have a webcam, surely you have a cellphone with a camera. If you don't have a cell with a cam, surely you have at least a cheap scanner and a film picture of you somewhere.

Why should I not want to know what someone looks like if I'm determining my interest in them? If we are going to play the 'superficiality' game and make presumptions about people who want pictures of people they're talking to as being just in it for mundane sexual reasons then I can use the same (poor) logic to to suggest that those who don't include images refuse to precisely because they are worried about being dismissed from that same group of people who they decry as being one-dimensional.

< Message edited by NihilusZero -- 10/9/2008 1:01:45 PM >

_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to WestBaySlave)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Removing a profile picture - 10/9/2008 2:32:21 PM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		I have to agree with Nihilus Zero.. thanks by the way for such a great answer.

The honest truth of it is, I want to see a picture. If there is physical attraction then I want to know how the mind works. I want to know that this person will call me or me him in a very short period of time ( I can't believe how many men are shocked when I ask for a phone number after one chat!!!).  If the dynamics seem instantly right and I want to meet, for a coffee within a 2 week time span. I don't want the mating dance, the cajoling or the bullshit that goes with vanilla dating. I want to know if this is the man I want/dont want to submit to. 2 minutes of meeting him will tell me that so why waste time?

If that doesn't happen then I will lose interest. Now thats me as a female so why should it be any different for a man?

(in reply to NihilusZero)
Profile   Post #: 20
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