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RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/12/2008 3:59:02 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		 
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

~FR~

Occasionally, of course. However, I have no wish to be a therapist or even an enablist to consistant or constant depression. The best way I would have to show my support would be to suggest professional help .. something I am unable to provide.


Most people get down once in a while, it does not mean they are clinically depressed. There are also life events that can make one depressed without being clinically depressed. If a person lose their house, your parents, dog, and job in the same year and are not a little down about it I would wonder about that person...

Also, even if a person becomes clinically depressed that is an illness like any other, one that I would be as supportive of as any other illness... if he had cancer it is the same as having a chemical imbalance in my mind.

Just my opinion

edited to add, I am not saying you are wrong, just offering a different view


< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 10/12/2008 4:00:07 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/12/2008 4:34:56 PM   
califsue


Posts: 593
Joined: 2/2/2008
Status: offline 		FR...Without reading all the replies...YES...
 
A prime example is my Master is dealing with an ill parent who is 80 something, not being allowed to come home. Although, we do not live together, it is my responsibility, as much as possible to provide support and comfort as he goes through this very trying time.

(in reply to jimmyrook)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/12/2008 5:46:44 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania


Most people get down once in a while, it does not mean they are clinically depressed. There are also life events that can make one depressed without being clinically depressed. If a person lose their house, your parents, dog, and job in the same year and are not a little down about it I would wonder about that person...

Also, even if a person becomes clinically depressed that is an illness like any other, one that I would be as supportive of as any other illness... if he had cancer it is the same as having a chemical imbalance in my mind.



Yeah, but if he had a lump and refused to get it checked out, yet it occupied all his time and thoughts that isn't something I would be supportive of.

Same thing when The Man got really down, beyond any help I could give. I told him that this was out of my league and he needed to see a professional. Which he did, and got the help he needed that I could never have given him because I'm not capable of it.

If his brakes weren't working, I wouldn't sympathize but I would offer to follow him to the repair shop and take him around till they finished the job. There's stuff I can do and stuff I can't. The op isn't specifying what or how long or if he's getting any professional help as well.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/12/2008 6:17:27 PM   
VivaciousSub


Posts: 446
Joined: 9/7/2008
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		<FR>

Of course I do, I'm a kind, generous person and I don't like seeing those around me feeling badly. I do what I can in those instances to help out my friends, my family, and my loved ones. It doesn't have jack to do with my submissiveness.

Relationships are not always 50-50 in the emotional give and take department. Some days it's 60-40, some days it's 10-90, and so on and so forth. The important thing, to me, is that each person helps out the other when needed, and in whatever manner is most fitting be it hot baths, back rubs, or suggesting professional help then helping them follow through.

For instance, I'm 1500 miles from home as I type this. My sister is going through a very bad time and I flew up here to Philadelphia to be with her. Not because I'm submissive, but because I love my sister.


< Message edited by VivaciousSub -- 10/12/2008 6:19:29 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/12/2008 7:43:20 PM   
hejira92


Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline 		I don't know.... I can see the other side of this...
 
If I was in a relationship that was only play/sessions; where I only interacted with him in dom/sub mode, it would be disconserting to see him emotionally inbalanced, to say the least. (and I choose the word imbalanced rather than unbalanced deliberately). Supporting someone who had always presented himself as the authoritative, unemotional, all-knowing dominant might be a stretch in that situation.
 
But for 24/7 real life situations- we are people in a loving relationship first, who just happen to enjoy a power exchange dynamic- it's a no-brainer.

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(in reply to VivaciousSub)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/12/2008 7:52:17 PM   
ExKat


Posts: 300
Joined: 8/25/2008
Status: offline 		  If my normally emotionally-solid dom is feeling yucky, I absolutely would support him. If something terrible happened and he was feeling lousy for months and months, I absolutely would support him. If he were clinically depressed and was seeking treatment or to fix things, then I'd absolutely support him.

If I was with an emotionally-screwy dom who was constantly feeling lousy and constantly seeking emotional support and putting himself down seeking compliments, eventually, I'd be too drained to play his games.

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(in reply to jimmyrook)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/13/2008 7:24:03 AM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline 		Yes but I am a caretaker by nature.  Feeling down or otherwise I am always concerned with supporting him.

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/13/2008 12:17:19 PM   
kristileigh


Posts: 1078
Joined: 3/23/2008
Status: offline 		Yes! As a sub you should always be supportive of your Master. Poor and weak is the sub that doesn't support her Master. And also shame on you. Sorta like in good and in bad times. No support should get a good punishment

(in reply to jimmyrook)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/13/2008 12:21:16 PM   
Honalori


Posts: 9
Joined: 11/13/2007
Status: offline 		Maybe I misread the original post. To me it appeared like the person was looking for support for them and asking if there were any who could. I have no idea otherwise why the specification of uncollared. Just a thought....

< Message edited by Honalori -- 10/13/2008 12:23:13 PM >

(in reply to kristileigh)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/13/2008 4:43:46 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		Of course I do, but like others have said I don't think it has a thing to do with my gender or submission.  It has to do with caring for someone.  It is just proper and instinctive.

lovingpet

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/13/2008 9:12:36 PM   
DoctorCthulhu


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/9/2008
Status: offline 		I'd like to thank everybody in this thread.  As a man and a new Master searching for a slave, I was curious how to approach this issue.  While I can be a dom, I'd hate to be distant from my slave.  I'm not a cold heartless man, but I simply didn't know how one should approach the slave/dom relationship.  Knowing that I don't have to be constantly made of iron and be warm and loving without losing dom authority--if that's a word for it--is very helpful.  Thank you. :)

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/14/2008 5:02:25 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		it's not my duty as submissive but as a caring human being to comfort and support Daddy whenever he's down.

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(in reply to jimmyrook)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/14/2008 5:03:40 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Any healthy partnership involves emotional support regardless of orientation.
So that would be a yes.
 
the.dark.

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/14/2008 6:05:46 AM   
LPslittleclip


Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline 		as a submissive i support my M'lady at all times, when she is down i am close and nurturing. my M'lady can drop after play so i look out for her well being. my M'Lady is a dominant human not a space alien, i know there will be times that are rough for her and its my place to help support her during those times.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/14/2008 12:07:14 PM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		Most of the time my Master is an upbeat guy.  Some days he is so tired that the best way i can support is him is to lay down with him and snuggle while he takes a nap.   Anything else i can do to support him other times i have and in the future will.  I love him and he loves me we suport each other.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to LPslittleclip)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/16/2008 4:25:06 AM   
ClassicV


Posts: 20
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I don't want to be depressed, but I am.  No-one wants to see their partner 'down', it's a case of if/how they help when they are. 

(in reply to BRNaughtyAngel)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/16/2008 12:44:38 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline 		jimmyrook, 
Yes, of course.  Without hesitation or second thought. 
  Davan

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Supporting your dom when i feels week... - 10/16/2008 1:37:48 PM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

PEOPLE should be this way. Not just females and not just submissives/slaves. The ones that aren't this way....are probably not worth knowing.


I agree with you, but not that long ago there was a thread on here where a handful of female sub/slave types were very clear that they didn't want to see signs of weakness in their dominants, sooooooooo. 


and isn't that sad. That a submissive would see her/his dominant as weak for showing any kind of vulnerability. Geez we are all human at the end of the day and the last man/Dominant I want in my life is the sort that could never show me every part of his emotions because they believed it would portray them as being 'not dominant enough'



(in reply to BRNaughtyAngel)
Profile   Post #: 38
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