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RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 12:29:31 AM

SummerWind

Posts: 314
Joined: 7/4/2007
Status: offline

I've never had anything to do with the local "community". But then, I've never joined any community, fraternity, social organization etc.....I've found I'm just not compatible with abiding by a predetermined set of rules and protocols that somone else has established for how I should behave in social situations. Plus, the politics, egos and issues that typically arise in formalized social settings bore the living shit out of me.......

"I'd never want to be in a club that would have me as a member"....

(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 21

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 1:07:14 AM

NormalOutside

Posts: 622
Joined: 1/8/2008
Status: offline

1.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 22

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 4:50:31 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SaFireRose

For the Masters and anyone else that would like to respond to these questions: On a scale of 1-10 (10 being the most important) how important is it to you and that your's attend the BDSM Community munches, play parties and the 101 sessions?

a zero - i have no interest in joining or attending kink-related things despite going to a couple of fetish parties (only to review the bands performing).

quote:

Is there anyone who can say they do not attend or do not have anything to do with the local bdsm community? Any mavericks out there that like to blaze their own trail?

yes - me

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

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(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 23

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 5:11:04 AM

VivaciousSub

Posts: 446
Joined: 9/7/2008
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline

It'd be a 0 or 1 for me (that just put me in the mind of a binary response joke, but I'll spare everyone). It's really not my thing to play in public or get together with people based on the fact I like having sundry parts of me whacked with a boat paddle. I like keeping my sexuality private.

_____________________________

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(in reply to SummerWind)

Post #: 24

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 6:14:08 AM

Rover

Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline

I don't know where it falls on any scale, but I enjoy being involved with the local community (and beyond) on a regular basis. I believe that most folks benefit from the accrual of those communities, even if indirectly. And consequently, it's important to me to support them when I'm able (which has been precious little this year).

John

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 25

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 10:49:53 AM

OldBastardly1

Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I'm going to say that I'm about an eight. There are some reasons why I chose such a high number. One of them is that I happen to be on the board in My little community. If the organizers don't show up to the events, who's going to support these kinds of things? Another has to do with the place I live. There are a lot of folks who drift in and out around here. Education for new folks coming in is always important. The social aspect puts it pretty high up there for Me, too, even if the other two reasons weren't especially true.

At the same time, I can't get to everything. I don't put the BDSM community above things like My job or My family. I can't make every event and I just attribute that to the fact that I have a life and other obligations.

I've done My own thing in the past. I can't say I got quite as much enjoyment out of doing private only, as opposed to private and community.

What LP said.

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 26

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 10:51:40 AM

Viridana

Posts: 754
Status: offline

I would say 8.
I thoroughly enjoy the company of like minded people, being able to discuss with others certain facets of my life that I couldn't discuss with others, therefore going to munches is a big part of my bdsm life.

(in reply to Rover)

Post #: 27

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 11:05:30 AM

myotherself

Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline

9 for me. I nearly dropped out of bdsm for good earlier this year after bad experiences meeting wannaDoms and associated nutters. I was chatting to a guy on cm who convinced me to go to the local munch in Sunderland, and it changed everything!

I now have a new circle of friends I can discuss anything and everything with, without risk of censure. I have a support group who can offer advice, support and drinking buddies. We have a great time every month at the munch, plus I've been to the local club and other events with them. I've also played with other Doms who have good reputations at the munch, and am now starting a relationship with a Dom of my own.

I owe my local community a great deal - I'd struggle to cope without them.

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk

(in reply to Viridana)

Post #: 28

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 11:10:06 AM

whiteslavebitch

Posts: 479
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline

I will say 1 for both me and MasterK. Neither of us are what you would call "joiners". We are very private, "loners". I have been to one munch maybe 7 years ago, and it was OK, but I'm not anxious to repeat it. I have had some curiosity toward public dungeons, but I couldn't imagine playing in public.

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formally collared 1/30/09

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(in reply to Viridana)

Post #: 29

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 4:01:10 PM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

That'd be a "1" for us. It's not that we're against community and new friends with shared interests, it's just not likely we'll find that in "the scene".

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to whiteslavebitch)

Post #: 30

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 5:48:10 PM

BRNaughtyAngel

Posts: 1821
Status: offline

He and I met at our local BDSM club, so I'm forever grateful for that. I go to more coffees, munches, parties and demos than Master, but that's because His work schedule interferes a great deal.

He allows me to go and socialize with our friends in the lifestyle, and He attends when He can. We don't really play in public at this point, and we do our own thing in a way that works for us. But we do enjoy watching others play, and supporting our club's dungeon with our donations of money, food and time (when we can).

Obviously a club has expenses and is dependant on those who utilize it to help keep it operational. Those who only come once or twice a year are not gonna keep it going, so without the regulars, we wouldn't have a dungeon.

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 31

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 7:33:54 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SaFireRose

On a scale of 1-10 (10 being the most important) how important is it to you and that your's attend the BDSM Community munches, play parties and the 101 sessions?

1

quote:

How important is it for you to keep up with the latest information and/or just socializing with other' like yourself?

1

quote:

If you get very busy and miss a few times do you feel the loss of not making it and if so, what is it exactly that you find yourself missing?

No... I don't feel that I miss anything.

quote:

Is there anyone who can say they do not attend or do not have anything to do with the local bdsm community?

I have attended events ... but it is very rarely.

quote:

Any mavericks out there that like to blaze their own trail?

I don't consider myself a maverick..... but I do walk my own path.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 32

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 7:54:13 PM

masterlink65

Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline

is "1" as low as i can go? the BDSM community in my area,is a fashion show of i have more leather than you do, and more social than anything. i have my own agenda, and find very little use for prudes and snobs, which i seem to find most in this community. even this site has been of little use. it is hard enough to even get a returned email from the potential slaves and subs on here.

so i guess it is all relative, to what you need from this. do you need to talk, talk ,talk,write, write, write, or do you want physical attention? most the interaction i have had with the community,has turned out to be parade performance.

i have met a few decent people, although, more times than not, i have found it to be more waste of time and money than any form of gratification.

my alpha slave was a member of hellfire for many years, and never felt as complete as he does now, being owned, and collared. which is a lot different than being used for a scene or weekend event. did being a member of hellfire prepare him for a life of slavery?

(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 33

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 8:01:42 PM

peppermint

Posts: 5169
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline

The community is important to us...but we don't get upset when we can't attend functions. While in Montana we live 125 from munch, and in the winter in Yuma, AZ, the nearest munch is 250 miles away. We don't get to attend on a regular basis. We've been known to travel 600 miles to attend something that really interests us. At 8 mpg with the motor home, that's an expensive trip, but worth it to us at times.

(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 34

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 8:18:14 PM

UmbraDomina

Posts: 491
Joined: 7/22/2008
From: SE Michigan
Status: offline

In the past..... 9-10, I have given demo's, presented, and been a community leader.

now about a 3-4, I do enjoy the occasional play party, I enjoy the energy and all that goes with it.
I very rarely go to munches.

< Message edited by UmbraDomina -- 10/20/2008 8:20:29 PM >

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~~ And I will show you something different from either your shadow at morning striding behind you Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you; I will show you fear in a handful of dust..... T.S. Elliot ~~

(in reply to peppermint)

Post #: 35

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 8:23:47 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

Sure, there's lots of people who can say they are not community minded people and do not do munches or play parties or demo's.

For me it's a 10 they go to play parties, since I like and go to play parties, and wouldn't not go just cause they didn't like it. Munches, it's a 0. I couldn't care less if they went or didn't go, since i find them boreing personally. And demo's it depends on the demo, but it's a 10.

It's not very important for me to keep super up on new info, but it's good to refresh every now and then.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SaFireRose

For the Masters and anyone else that would like to respond to these questions: On a scale of 1-10 (10 being the most important) how important is it to you and that your's attend the BDSM Community munches, play parties and the 101 sessions? How important is it for you to keep up with the latest information and/or just socializing with other' like yourself? If you get very busy and miss a few times do you feel the loss of not making it and if so, what is it exactly that you find yourself missing?

Is there anyone who can say they do not attend or do not have anything to do with the local bdsm community? Any mavericks out there that like to blaze their own trail?

(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 36

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 9:14:40 PM

BLGirl

Posts: 209
Joined: 10/17/2008
Status: offline

Daddy and I would like to attend something in our area, just to meet people that might be something like us that we can talk with and just be ourselves. The fear is that we will meet people that are nothing like us and that we will not like the scene one bit. Plus, the nearest anything is 140 miles away.

Like I said though, it would be nice to meet others like ourselves to exchange ideas or share thoughts.

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)

Post #: 37

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/20/2008 11:47:02 PM

susie

Posts: 1699
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub

For us it's a 1, we do none of that. This message is board is the only BDSM socializing i do, and He does none.

Exactly the same for us. We have been to one Fetish Fair together and Master went to a munch once before we met and hated it. It is our relationship and we don't need any outside influences.

(in reply to proudsub)

Post #: 38

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/21/2008 12:39:26 AM

shivermetimbers

Posts: 2060
Joined: 6/7/2008
Status: offline

First off let me say that in no way am I calling anyone who responded a liar or hypocrite. But your question was very interesting mostly for the replies. And perhaps it may be the way I'm reading the OP's question, but the first round of replies really hit me, being that up to this point, it was a resounding couldn't care less about muches and play parties etc.

Yet....when someone comes on looking for advice on "how do I meet..." or "where can I find..." type questions, so many of the responses are, "Go to munches, get involved with the local BDSM community...." and so on and so forth.

Just pointing out an observation, not a finger.

FYI, my hope is to be involved in such activities, though I've never been to any. So I don't have a point of view of experience in them.

_____________________________

I love you Deanna, you make every day a better day.

If we descended from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ3CJi0Ih9s&feature=player_embedded

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(in reply to SaFireRose)

Post #: 39

RE: Codes of the "community" - 10/21/2008 1:22:06 AM

MirrorrirroM

Posts: 35
Joined: 9/5/2008
Status: offline

For me at the moment in my life it's about a 9.
The local bdsm community here is absolutely wonderful, and in the short time I have been involved in it I have learned SO much, stuff that would've taken me so much longer without having the opportunity to listen to and meet many experienced, intelligent people in the community. Since I am new the 101 classes are very important to me, and even though my Sir has been in the scene quite a bit longer than I have he does still go to classes with me :) Play parties are a blast. I absolutely love being a social butterfly, and getting to play with new people and watch scenes and try new things. I'd like to eventually get to a point in my bdsm education where I can actually teach others, so being active in the community means a lot to me.

(in reply to shivermetimbers)

Post #: 40

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