The Steel Warm-up .TM

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

The Steel Warm-up .TM

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> The Steel Warm-up .TM

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 12:42:30 PM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

Hello all.

For those of you who follow the Poll's and Random Stupidity Threads you will know that I recently had a Pre-Birthday Celebration and part of the event was to attend a Swinger Club in Las Vegas called the Green Door and play in thier relativly Impressive Dungeon (Impressive in that it was decently stocked and most of the items were decently made) While at this little Shin-dig I decided to drop my apprehensions and actually play in front of other people.

As a Rule I am not a Public Player. I have many reasons but the basics are that I do not care to be critiqued in my activities, I don't want a DM deciding what is best for my partner, and mostly I worry more about my surrounding than I do my Target and I find that to be a little too dangerous and therefore I just do not engage.

Beyond that up until this very weekend I had issue with the lable of Sadist. Many People here have heard my reasons for why I did not believe I was a Sadist but after this weekend I have come to terms with that and agree completely that I am 100% a Sadist. I never used to see myself as a Sadist because I was always actually afraid to hurt someone. Even when in a school yard fights I would intentionally hold back afraid that if I let go I might kill somebody. I have always enjoyed spanking and andi hates that I take devilish delight in smacking her inner thigh without warning. I enjoy the finger print marks that get left. But when it comes to the whips and chains nastiness of the S&M World I always considered myself tame...........

That is until this past weekend in which our very own Merc and his lovely slave beth gave way to an invite to The Green Door, and thier Dungeon. For the most part we OWNED the room only a few people came in and actually did anything in the room, one guy gave his girl a all around decent seccion using many of the toys that we brought and a paddle swat that we were all rather impressed by. When it came time I hand cuffed andi to the Stripper Pole that stood in the middle of the room. (beth will have to tell the story of actually BEING the stripper pole) I started spanking and swatting the girl as I usually would but this time there was an erotisism about it, maybe it was because of what we were doing, maybe it was because we were being watched, maybe because anyone who wanted would walk right in and witness our decadence, whatever it was andi was excited by it and each and every spank became a sexual act, no longer an act of violence, now it was as if her entire body were one big erogenous zone and with each swat she got closer to orgasm. Because of this I found that her excitement now excited me, not in a sexual way perse but rather in a Sensual way that made me want to hit her more and take her Deeper and Harder. I can only Prey that every Sadist feels this when they strike thier target because if they don't, if I am infact Unique then they world is missing a sensation that should be marketed to the masses.

When I uncuffed andi she nearly fell to the floor, she was shaking and unable to answer me right away, she looked like a girl who discovered an orgasm for the first time, but more than that she was excited about it.She saw things differently. It was no longer about pain it was actually about pleasure and she finally figured out how that worked, how that was possible.

Oddly enough when I moved to the Bench which was a contraption inbetween what looked like two St Andrews Crosses with a Padded Platform connected on one side and not on the other meaning who was attached to it was simply inverted not horizontal and I started up working andi over I listened as Merc started joking about "Nice Warm-Up" basically infering that I don't have one. This is not the case I have a warm up it is just an intense one. I learned that I hit firmly to begin with and get harder as the session continues. or what Merc has lovingly coined the "Steel Warm-up"

My purpose in starting this thread would be to find out how normal this realization is with other Sadists and when they discovered thier attraction to giving pain? Also I was wondering if anyone else finds a direct conection to the bottoms enjoyment being directly porportional to the enjoyment of the Top. I Honestly believe that if she had hated it I would have disliked it as well.

Then there was the other partisipator who I got to play with WyldHrt and I took delight in showing her exactly what she could take. I know she was in pain but I took pride in her as she took everything that I had to offer, The emotions here were different but equally enjoyable. The Back Scratcher that caused the little foot prints INSTANTLY was an amazing experience, After receiving the hardest of her swats and visually watching the bruise form I was, for lack of any better word, proud.

So Anyone else ever has these kinds of experiences? Please forgive me if this is old Hat to established Sadists but I found the experience enlightening.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 1:18:15 PM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

For the most part, his sadistic desires are more appeased when the bottom is not enjoying a sensation and does not get any direct pleasure out of the activity. However, he also enjoys engaging in play where both parties are enjoying the activities and getting direct pleasure out of the sensations that are being caused. Those types of play just don't feed his sadism.

There was one play he did with me recently, he did not exert much effort and he was causing me a great deal of pain that I was not enjoying at all. He laughed more during that play than any other play we have had. His laughter was purely because I was hating it and he knew it.

Of course, he can also take a much loved sensation by a bottom and make them hate it in that moment. He enjoys taking what gives us pleasure and pushing it to the point where it is only pain and no pleasure.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to SteelofUtah)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 1:44:46 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah
I listened as Merc started joking about "Nice Warm-Up" basically infering that I don't have one. This is not the case I have a warm up it is just an intense one. I learned that I hit firmly to begin with and get harder as the session continues. or what Merc has lovingly coined the "Steel Warm-up"

Steel, darling, sweetie. No, I wasn't there. So perhaps I have no room to comment. *shrugs* So let me say this... "hitting firmly to begin with" is not a warmup... it is no warmup, it is hitting hard and getting harder. Hence the "Steel Warm-up."

If it works for you and your girl, that's all that matters. But know that when we say the "Steel Warmup", it means there isn't a warmup.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to SteelofUtah)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 1:51:39 PM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

Yes Sweetie, Heart of my Heart. Love of my Love. I Gathered that. I got that from the look on his face and the way he used it after that.

I just don't pussy foot around. I made a point to attempt a Warm-up Later which was laughed at so as far as I am concerned I have tow girls who enjoyed my process and you who did everything you could to get out of it, so untill you have been the subject you don't get any real say. -wink-

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to CalifChick)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 2:05:31 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

Hi Steel,
I was looking forward to this post all day and looking forward to the discussion that originated that night.

It seems that you want to take the discussion in a direction that goes away from the use of the 'Steel Warm-Up'; but at the risk of being accused of a hijack I want to give you a serious comment directed specifically to the use of such a technique. I thought it was perfect!

Although I didn't have a name for it I've used it in the past especially in the kind of venue and atmosphere we were in. There were people around, there was talking, there were a lot of people who had no familiarly to the concepts of 'head-space' or 'sub-space' or any appreciation of dungeon decorum. In the middle of that, you and your beautiful andi exposed a very intimate aspect of your relationship. Could there be a better way to focus andi or yourself than the method you chose? Everything from the sound to the visual result on andi's ass screamed for focus and attention. Good for you my friend. In the past, I've used a blindfold on beth to help her block out distractions. However, a 'Steel Warm-Up' serves just as well if not better.

Again, not the focus of your post - Sorry for the slight hijack!

quote:

My purpose in starting this thread would be to find out how normal this realization is with other Sadists and when they discovered their attraction to giving pain?

It may be just me and my weird only child upbringing, but my first sadist memory was enjoying the old 'Three Stooges' shorts. I remember I liked seeing people hit by pies in the face, smacked around, and the general consensual and non-consensual play. Staying on the reference I also remember that nobody really got hurt, and it seems like a LOT of fun; especially for 'Moe' most of the time.

It seems that over time instead of getting past that developmental progression I decided to nurture it, ultimately including it in my sexuality; including the messy parts. I learned that there was a label attached to such an attraction - sadist; which had some very negative connotations and historically infamous people associated with the label. Oh well, what are you going to do? I knew I didn't desire to kill my partner, or do anything that would cause permanent or serious injury. If using the label gave my potential partner a clear understanding about what I was 'into' - I relished taking on the label and let the details sort themselves out over time.

I'm conscience of what I can do. beth has never experienced what it would be like to be hit with a full force strike from me. I don't think andi has from you either. So we understand and control the intensity and through it the focus. If anything that fact illustrates our compassion, our love if you will for our partners, while at the same time the sensation serves our sadistic nature. The compatible masochistic desires of our partners makes the dynamic work well.

quote:

Also I was wondering if anyone else finds a direct connection to the bottoms enjoyment being directly proportional to the enjoyment of the Top.

ABSOLUTELY! This is why it is difficult if not impossible for me to engage in play with anyone I don't know a little bit. It takes time to appreciate the nuances of a person's bodily reactions and even more time to be able to read them to a point where you can trust them and they can trust you. There is a balance of giving that I enjoy. A submissive gifts me with their trust to use their body; I give them my focus and attention and provide sensation.

quote:

I Honestly believe that if she had hated it I would have disliked it as well.

True and keep in mind there is a place for such a mental dynamic. When there is a need for punishment that is exactly the mindset both partners should be giving to each other. It isn't a form of play, even if it uses the exact same toy or method of application. By keeping this mindset in mind the avoidance of punishment becomes a goal for both partners-as it should be outside the 'play' dynamic.

We miss you guys already - when are we going back to Vegas?

(in reply to SteelofUtah)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 2:16:09 PM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

I have read your replay 3 or 4 times now Merc and I agree. Everything you say makes Perfect Sense.

Do you ever find it Odd how Simple things we find complicated can be?

As For Vegas, I am doing everything I can to plan out the finances for it as soon as possible. With the Holliday Season coming I am seeing very SMALL windows. I am sure you have plans for New Years, That was one of our windows we don't have plans for that day. E-mail me your Schedule I will let you know what ours looks like.

And to BOTH of you Thank You SO Much for being a Part of our experience.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 2:20:55 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah
untill you have been the subject you don't get any real say. -wink-

Duly noted.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to SteelofUtah)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 2:30:02 PM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

Cali,

It really isn't as bad as it has been made out to be, I mean all things considered WyldHrt took them and it was a first for her.

When we see each other next I will be more than happy to show you what they are like.

-smiles-

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to CalifChick)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: The Steel Warm-up .TM - 10/22/2008 2:38:19 PM

PatentLeatherMdm

Posts: 17
Joined: 8/26/2005
Status: offline

welcome to Sadism 101 and the enjoyment of your whole self!

I've been snickering for as long as I can remember at pratfalls and like mrs. merc I trace My early understandings back to the Stooges! Thank God for TV and good clean harmless (?) fun.

I'm genuinely a loving person, but within Me exists the heart of a sadist through and through. I am aroused (emotionally and erotically) when someone is accepting My infliction of pain (or intense sensation play) because of what we share within a D/s relationship. This means that almost everyone is safe from My interests. To have that one special one accept Me and the pain I wish to bring them is intense!

I agree with the warm-up (or seemingly lack thereof), but I would hope this signals a real understanding of their partner's tolerances and perhaps is indicative of someone who has a higher pain threshold. I'm not interested in harming or otherwise breaking My toy(s), because I'm always looking forward to the day when I can use them again next.

It's always a balancing act, both inside a scene and outside in the vanilla world. No matter what, I try to not to be provoked into action. I've had submissives who tried to engage Me through confrontation through their own need to be dominated.

(in reply to SteelofUtah)

Profile

Post #: 9