RE: Back and Rewind

RE: Back and Rewind (Full Version)

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sweetpettjenny -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 5:12:47 AM)
Ive learned in 14 years and it finally evolved this year to just be open, tell him even if its something that embarasses you.

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 10:00:11 AM)
Well, Padraig seems to have covered many of my bases! But, I have learned: There is nothing wrong with ME. There might not be a fit, but it isn't my fault, or anyone else's. Liars never change. Only their rationalizations do. No second chances.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 3:03:05 PM)
quote: There is nothing wrong with ME. There might not be a fit, but it isn't my fault, or anyone else's. Liars never change. Only their rationalizations do. No second chances. Sounds a little harsh babe! Sometimes people lie about little things for fear of rejection. I don't condone lying, but feel there are degrees of offensiveness, and punishments may need to be different (do you drop him all together, or just smack him for stupidity). [;)] M

candystripper -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 3:19:19 PM)
quote: The one thing I have learned.. is to be honest with myself. The more I quit trying to convince myself of something, the more I don't have to convince someone else. Being on Collarme for this short time has helped me be more open and honest about who I really am and want to be. I've had to back track a few times because I've met on line so far a few that seem to think that they can change me to suit them totally. And I've about fell into it a few times. But then I come and read the forums on here, and other sites i've been on and talk to other Dom/Dommes.... and subs... And I find I'm being pulled into someone elses fantasy. And I'm reminded, I am the one who was looking to find one that fits WITH me. Not be pulled into something I really don't want. So far it's looking good... (fingers crossed) truesub4u i have learnt -- again --"Men Don't Change". candystripper

KnightofMists -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 3:30:45 PM)
quote: What did you learn that you take forward? That I am never the same person from moment to moment and no one else is either. quote: What will you never do again Try to fix somebody! quote: what worked Being true to myself first and foremost! quote: what did you not do that said--ok next time I know better?-- forgot to be true to myself first and foremost!

fldrkhorse -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 3:47:26 PM)
quote: i have learnt -- again --"Men Don't Change". Why do we need to? Women take us back anyway.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 3:49:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fldrkhorse Why do we need to? Women take us back anyway. It's so wrong how true that is.

LadyJulieAnn -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 3:51:01 PM)
I've learned, as many have stated here, to be true to myself. I've also learned to find happiness within myself and be accepting of kindness and praise because I deserve it. I will no longer settle for things/people that do not fit my needs and desires. I will also never again assume that I hold a place of importance in someone's life. Be well, Julie

IrishMist -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 4:00:57 PM)
quote: what did you learn that you take forward? I have learned that I am not perfect... quote: What will you never do again, I will never again forget to tell someone how much they mean to me quote: what worked The brutality of the truth coming from friends quote: what did you not do that said--ok next time I know better?-- I refused to let family and friends share in pain

brightspot -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 6:20:39 PM)
I would never become involved again with a lawyer or someone in law enforcement. I have been involved with both and learned that most people of those profressions to varying degrees have problems with communication and of cutting themselves off from their emotions and feelings. I course I am not saying ALL people in these professions have this problem, but I think many of them do from my experience. I also don't think it is something that happens to them consciously. I think it is more their profession that does it to them. I think that most go into either of these jobs feeling enthusiastic about helping people, but having to continually not let personal feelings get involved in their cases, once a case is done, never look back, having to face horrible real life situations involving death and murder causes them to get really good at shutting down. Then unknowingly also bring this block into their personal relationships. My partner who was a prominant defense attorney could stand up in front of a packed courtroom in a huge case and communicate with the jury and usually convince them of her vision of the case. But in our personal relationship she had the communications skills of a corpse! The policewoman was not to far behind her in those skills. They both aggravated and frustrated the chit out of me, as I need really good, clear communication in my relationships. The only time she(lawyer) got anywhere near good communication was when we were in an argument and she felt she needed to "defend" herself[:D]. So if I ever were to be looking for a partner again, it would never be a person working in either of these fields. Two very important lessons for me. *Brightspot

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/16/2005 6:50:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig quote: There is nothing wrong with ME. There might not be a fit, but it isn't my fault, or anyone else's. Liars never change. Only their rationalizations do. No second chances. Sounds a little harsh babe! Sometimes people lie about little things for fear of rejection. I don't condone lying, but feel there are degrees of offensiveness, and punishments may need to be different (do you drop him all together, or just smack him for stupidity). [;)] M Yeah, it's harsh..........and I admit that I am oversensitive to lies after being in a relationship with a pathological liar! But there's a heap of difference between little lies and BIGASS CHICANERY, and it's the big stuff that I just don't get past. "Oh, I didn't want to hurt you" is NOT an excuse for a big lie---to me, a hurtful truth is better than a sugarcoated poison pellet. :)F

pandoravampire -> RE: Back and Rewind (12/17/2005 4:10:55 AM)
i learnt that becoming a well 'educated' sub, made me top from the bottom. i learnt that we will do things his way, his pace, or no way. i learnt that begging works best, when you really do need what your begging for. i learnt patience. i learnt truly how to communicate honestly, and not 'hold' back to save feelings of either party. i learnt that im not what most would deem a submissive, but i am exactly what he wishes to dominate. i learnt that what other think, means jack shit in relation to 'us' i learnt to trust again. i learnt to love again. And id do it all over again, anyday.

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