Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 10/25/2008 10:06:48 PM

Klaio

Posts: 27
Joined: 9/17/2008
Status: offline

Is there a more powerful impact to wearing a chastity device, than not?

Wearing a chastity device limits your erections and your ability to stimulate, you have no choice and cannot cum until you can take it off.

I think not wearing one is worse, because you can become fully erect and reach the edge, but have to keep yourself from cumming on willpower, rather than having a physical item restrain you.

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 10/25/2008 11:53:01 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

To me, not wearing chastity and not touching it just because I say so shows more of a desire to be obedient.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Klaio)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 10/26/2008 4:11:57 AM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

A man will ejaculate, with or without a chastity device. And even if you were able to mentally prevent ejaculation, you'd come once asleep. The body regulates "clearing the pipes" itself. Like "you can't come when you have had a vasectomy", this is sub-urban legend.

(in reply to Klaio)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 10/27/2008 9:48:02 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

I will use a chastity with certain things in mind... but my ultimate goal is for him to be able to depend on himself, not a device. Sometimes with a device their mind is on the device... not quite what I had in mind.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!

(in reply to antipode)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 10/29/2008 1:49:43 AM

sleuthingsub

Posts: 68
Joined: 1/30/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

A man will ejaculate, with or without a chastity device. And even if you were able to mentally prevent ejaculation, you'd come once asleep. The body regulates "clearing the pipes" itself. Like "you can't come when you have had a vasectomy", this is sub-urban legend.

A wet dream is a tad different than a full blown orgasm though. Plus, a lot of your unused sperm is excreted when you urinate.

I think the point with chastity devices is that they prevent a lot of the pleasure I usually take for granted, such as a simple erection. It still relies on my self discipline, since I'm overseas and have a key.

(in reply to antipode)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 10/29/2008 8:57:04 AM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

I will use a chastity with certain things in mind... but my ultimate goal is for him to be able to depend on himself, not a device. Sometimes with a device their mind is on the device... not quite what I had in mind.

Unfortunately, sometimes this equates to the feeling a submissive has that his dominant is either lazy or possibly not really all that interested in him. I'd imagine this is most likely not the case, but there does tend to be a tendency in dominants to be more and more hands off, indicating that their desire for submission is someone who is willing to always be submissive and not be in desire of self-fulfillment. I think this ends up being an eventual destructive factor, because there's a tipping point where the submissive (and I know it's happened to me) starts to think that if she's any less interested than it's probably not worth continuing the relationship. I've left what started out as great relationships for this exact reason, and no matter how much I've tried to talk about it, I've always gotten the cold shoulder and the my way or the highway response until I left. Then after a few months of realizing that finding a quality submissive is really not that easy, I get contacted back again, but I have a policy of never returning to someone who has parted ways with me.

_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me

http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to Lockit)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 10/29/2008 3:54:16 PM

Shawn1066

Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline

I don't wear chastity, and I don't touch because my Owner says not to. I am only allowed if I ask for permission and write her a detailed thank you, which I have done twice when we were apart for a significant period of time. I prefer this way, because I would view being locked in chastity as a lack of trust unless it was presented to me properly.

DV's Fox

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 11/1/2008 4:57:57 AM

RXRob

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/26/2008
Status: offline

It's a lot more teasing if you can get it up.

There's nothing hotter than being teased, knowing that I could have her at any second, but not purely because that's what I've been told to do.

(in reply to Shawn1066)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 11/2/2008 9:56:56 AM

o2cumagain

Posts: 5
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

i think littlesarbon's reply is a very valid one, if i may add also that some submissives feel the need for enforced chastity not only for sexual reasons but to have constant reminder(s) of their position, having to visit a stall to piss, trying to hide the bulge in their trousers, going to the gym and find a way to use the equipment all the time trying to hide the fact that you are a submissive in the vanilla world. also knowing that you are totaly controled by another who may or may not remove that cage from your scrotum . There are many pro's and con's regarding this area so its always good to disscuss it, this submissive prefers to have his sexual behaviour controlled by another helping him to focus on the important thing in his life serving his Mistress...

(in reply to RXRob)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 11/2/2008 9:24:42 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

I will use a chastity with certain things in mind... but my ultimate goal is for him to be able to depend on himself, not a device. Sometimes with a device their mind is on the device... not quite what I had in mind.

Unfortunately, sometimes this equates to the feeling a submissive has that his dominant is either lazy or possibly not really all that interested in him. I'd imagine this is most likely not the case, but there does tend to be a tendency in dominants to be more and more hands off, indicating that their desire for submission is someone who is willing to always be submissive and not be in desire of self-fulfillment. I think this ends up being an eventual destructive factor, because there's a tipping point where the submissive (and I know it's happened to me) starts to think that if she's any less interested than it's probably not worth continuing the relationship. I've left what started out as great relationships for this exact reason, and no matter how much I've tried to talk about it, I've always gotten the cold shoulder and the my way or the highway response until I left. Then after a few months of realizing that finding a quality submissive is really not that easy, I get contacted back again, but I have a policy of never returning to someone who has parted ways with me.

I do not understand how mental chastity is related to a hands off appoach. Nothing you said is anything close to the type of relationships I have had or plan to have. I am very involved and very hands on! I do not use chastity much or for long periods of time, but I do expect self control for many things and many reasons and this would be just one aspect of things as far as I was concerned.

If someone is not paying attention to you, you should go and find someone who will pay attention. I love my submissive's/men and I can't imagine the type of relationship you are talking about here.

In another post on this thread, there is a discription of what the submissive feels in a device, the hiding it, the reminder and more. This is a good thing in ways, but like I said, often it is the device getting the attention rather than me and what I want him to focus on. Most often my submissive has a reminder of me on at all times, whether that is a collar, leather band, ring or something around his cock and or balls... but the ultimate goal is for my man... to have control of himself without a device so we can play it both ways. Sometimes I do feel that the submissive is too self obsorbed and if he needs the device for all the reasons the other poster mentioned... I am not a happy domme. A lot of that is all about him. I give him a lot... I will not ignore him, his needs or his satisfaction, but if he is that self involved... we have a problem.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: Restrained vs. Unrestrained Chastity - 11/3/2008 5:23:18 AM

sensualslave28

Posts: 45
Joined: 1/8/2005
From: Australia
Status: offline

personally i think that mental chastity is a much better way as long as the sub has the discipline - if not they may be in trouble easily

if you have a device say like a cb6000 then theres no test for the sub

< Message edited by sensualslave28 -- 11/3/2008 5:26:06 AM >

_____________________________

http://www.dungeondownunder.com

- THE BEST VALUE ONLINE BDSM AND FETISH TOYS AND FETISH WEAR SITE -

(in reply to Lockit)

Profile

Post #: 11