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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 3:55:01 PM   
Leonidas


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quote:

These societies were mostly male-dominated, and justification for male power was made by swinging to the opposite (false) extreme, declaring that the woman was just an inert vessel, and that the man alone determined the genetics of the offspring.


I have seen the "empty vessel" view of women in many places. Aristotle said the same. I find it a big conceptual jump to view it as a way of asserting male power. I would think that in neolithic society male power was asserted the old fashioned way, by asserting power and being strong enough, both physically and in terms of leadership qualities, to be able to back those assertions up against those who would challenge them. With the advent of religions of whatever kind came "priestly power", but for the most part, I think that priestly power has at best been allied with political power, rarely one in the same for very long. We don't really like to admit it anymore, but real power, and even more nobel notions like justice, really come down to the sword. Where priestly power defied or was at odds with the sword, it didn't last long.

quote:

But Australian aboriginies and a few other cultures have stubbornly claimed that there was no connection between sex and childbirth even into the 20th century, so one can't make any universal generality.


Having seen their women I might be prepared to argue the same myself.

< Message edited by Leonidas -- 8/18/2004 4:16:21 PM >


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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 4:05:56 PM   
NoCalOwner


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Woops, on my way to work I remembered something, and now have to retract one of my earlier statements. That's what happens after 20 years or so of not using one's undergrad studies...

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leonidas
I knew about Boudica. Joan of Arc is another example of a woman leading an army in battle that came much later. Is the thinking that women warriors were common among the celts, or like Joan, a rare exception?


After Claudius' armies subdued a significant part of what is now England, most of the leaders of that area agreed to accept the Romans as overlords. One of these peoples was the Brigantes (who identified with the goddess Brigantia, now better remembered as Ireland's St. Briget), occupying most of what is now Yorkshire and Northumberland. Their leader was Queen Cartimandua, and when their delegation was brought to Rome to pay homage, they were led to the Emperor Claudius and his wife, Agrippina. They assumed that Rome must be under the rule of an Empress, and so ignored Claudius and all started bowing to Agrippina and showing her respect.

Some years later Cartimandua's husband, having been dumped by his wife in favor of her squire, led a rebellion against her, and the Romans (despite their having doubts about female leadership) remained faithful to the Brigantes' tradition of queenly rule, and backed Cartimandua.

These recollection got me checking some old sources, and lo and behold...

Tacitus, in putting a pre-battle speech into the mouth of the Roman general Suetonius, said that there were more women than men in Boudica's army.

Diodorus said that the women of Gaul were nearly as tall as the men, who they rivalled in courage. Ammianus Marcellinus said that Gaulish women were even stronger than their husbands, and makes them sound like very skilled streetfighters.

In 102 AD, Plutarch said, describing a battle with the Celts: "the fight had been no less fierce with the women than with the men themselves... the women charged with swords and axes and fell upon their opponents uttering a hideous outcry."

So I have to retract some of what i said before. My focus as a historian was post-Roman, and I had forgotten that women had been on an equal, or perhaps even superior footing before the Roman occupation. My bad.

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 4:35:43 PM   
Leonidas


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quote:

Tacitus, in putting a pre-battle speech into the mouth of the Roman general Suetonius, said that there were more women than men in Boudica's army.


I might have said the same in a pre-battle speech to my men. Tacitus didn't happen to mention whether the men cheered or laughed at this particular revelation, did he? "We're facing a bunch of women" sounds like a good pre-battle morale booster to me, especially at a time when women were just spoils of war.

quote:

Ammianus Marcellinus said that Gaulish women were even stronger than their husbands, and makes them sound like very skilled streetfighters.


Again, I might have said the same. You have to remember that to the ears of the listener of the time "your women are stronger than you are" would have been a damn good insult, and quite possibly would have elicited a belly-laugh in the reader.

quote:

In 102 AD, Plutarch said, describing a battle with the Celts: "the fight had been no less fierce with the women than with the men themselves... the women charged with swords and axes and fell upon their opponents uttering a hideous outcry."


Now this I do remember reading. Wasn't the context of this attack by the women the victorious romans attempting to enter the Celt camp and, um, enjoy the fruits of conquest?

Bodica inherited her kingdom from her dead husband, and was publically flogged, and her daughters raped by the Romans, yes? This was an outrage that started a rebellion. It's not as if she and her daughters were warrior princesses in their own right. They became symbols of revolt. Am I remembering this wrong? It's been a while since I read about it.

You probably have a much better understanding of these things than I do. I'll have to go back and look at the roman sources again. You bring up some interesting things. I'm very curious as to their context.

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 5:31:26 PM   
WayHome


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After realizing that any rational argument against Leonidas would simply be dismissed as an academic conspiracy, I lost track of this thread. That was a misatake as it has continued to produce valuable words.

We have shifted from male submissives and female dominants to female political power which, to me, is a very different thing. In the classical "Ozzy and Hariet" relationship men held all the political power, though women held quite a bit of personal power and within her realm of the home was sometimes even overtly dominant, more often covertly so. But since we've changed the focus to a boarder social dynamic....

quote:

"And let's put one lie to rest for all time: the lie that men are oppressed, too, by sexism--the lie that there can be such a thing as 'men's liberation groups.' Oppression is something that one group of people commits against another group, specifically because of a 'threatening' characteristic shared by the latter group--skin color, sex or age, etc. The oppressors are indeed FUCKED UP by being masters, but those masters are not OPPRESSED. Any master has the alternative of divesting himself of sexism or racism--the oppressed have no alternative--for they have no power--but to fight. In the long run, Women's Liberation will of course free men--but in the short run it's going to cost men a lot of privilege, which no one gives up willingly or easily. Sexism is NOT the fault of women--kill your fathers, not your mothers."
Robin Morgan


Thank you for the list of quotes! Obviously some I agree with and some I don't (not counting the last few from the "opposition" which were intended so). But of all those that I disagree with, this one by Robin Morgan stands out.

I used to be a feminist. Then I read "Why Men Are the Way They Are" by Dr Warren Farrell. It's easy to dismiss and ridicule "men's movements" and they sometimes deserve it, but herein lies a very lucid and profound analysis of our gender dynamic. Warren Farrel used to be the vice-president of NOW and was a prominent feminist in the 70s. Then he had an epiphany and wrote that book. It was almost certainly Warren Farrel that Robin Morgan was attempting to rebutt in that quote. I strongly urge any feminist, male or female, to read Dr Farrel. It was one of those books that permanently altered my life: up there with "Budhism and Behavior Modification" by Dr Bill Mikulas, and "Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind" by Shunryu Suzuki.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index%3Dstripbooks%26field-keywords%3D%252522Why%252520Men%252520Are%252520the%252520Way%252520They%252520Are%252522%26store-name%3Dbooks/103-9225179-8695824

One thing that seems to be missing in this conversation about the historical power of women is that the power of women can be completely independant of whether they fight. It's easy to look at Boudicia as a powerful woman, but Margaret Thacher never raised a weapon in combat, neither did George W for that matter.

The cultures mentioned by NoCalOwner are widely accepted to have been matriarchal DISPITE previous strong academic prejudice AGAINST thie idea (caps for Leonidas) That the women had the power does not preclude war or preclude that men did the work of war. I come from a military family (on my mother's side). An admiral, captains, and a recently retired commodore: all strong and formidable men who command other men. All of them spending much time away from home. All of them live(d) in homes where the power in the home belonged to their equally formidable and dominant wives. In fact, if there is anything I have learned about a navy career, it is that you cannot progress to the top if you don't have a competent and powerful woman in charge of your home life and your children. Each of these men were dominated in a certain context by women. Some of them purposefully and some by necessity. The really interesting part comes when those men retire and start living full-time in those homes. The commodore unconciously expected to usurp his home from his wife when he was no longer focused on running naval aviation training for the entire USA. That didn't work out for him. In the end I think he has been somewhat emasculated. The Admiral from the previous generation was far wiser in my book. He knew my grandmother ruled the home for 46 years and had no intention of challenging that. In the end he played the role of a devoted servant to his wife and, though he did engage in vanilla submission, he never became any less of a man.

Back to the wider scale, the US military is powerful and masculine in it's culture (with or without gays and women) and yet it is subservient to our civilian government. That dynamic is at the core of our national identity and our way of life. The authority to which they answer could, in a primitive society where physical strength still matters, still just as easily be a feminine one.

PS-I think the reference to the "Marylin Mansons of the world" is funny since he is a Dom in both practice and by identity. Not a masculine one, but a powerful one just the same.

Chimps and humans are genetically more similar than chimps and gorillas. Bonobos are closer to chimps than any of those are to each other. So what? So a very small genetic change can result in a vastly different natural social dynamic. Thus, to attribute human social dynamics to programmed genetics from more distant relatives has no no support in evolutionary science. Demonic Males is a great book that has value not as a weapon in a war of philosophies, but as a weapon against ignorance.

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 6:42:45 PM   
Leonidas


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Yes, WayHome, you do seem to pick your spots here.

quote:

The cultures mentioned by NoCalOwner are widely accepted to have been matriarchal DISPITE previous strong academic prejudice AGAINST thie idea (caps for Leonidas ) That the women had the power does not preclude war or preclude that men did the work of war.


Well, OK, I'm thinking that since we're looking at pretty much the same evidence that we used to look at, in terms of historical accounts, what you are talking about is a difference in interpretation, yes? You sure the prejudice is one way, and not the other? Maybe you have a bit of a bias yourself. Britons have traditionally had queens when there was no male to carry on the line. There isn't any question about that. That is what happened in Boudica's case. Did that make the society as a whole matriarchial? Were the women really the dominant sex in the day to day life of the Celts? Were they bonobo like? I don't think so. Maybe you do.

I agree, if a man surrenders sovereignty over his home as a young man, it's not right that he should try to reclaim it as an old man.

quote:

Back to the wider scale, the US military is powerful and masculine in it's culture (with or without gays and women) and yet it is subservient to our civilian government. That dynamic is at the core of our national identity and our way of life. The authority to which they answer could, in a primitive society where physical strength still matters, still just as easily be a feminine one.


Nothing wrong with this, if a woman is a good leader, and understands the realities involved. I think that a woman who does is the rare exception. If we end up with a Ms. Abzug as a leader who wants to make the stream green and growing and safe for everyone under the rainbow, we just might be in a little trouble. A woman could, I guess, be so cynical as to preach equality and then put men in a yolk and harness their strength and agression to do the ugly work of war for them. They can, that is, if they have some good men protecting them while they do it. I'm not sure why you, as a man, would accept such a yolk willingly. Maybe it's something you learned from the bonobos, or Dr. Farrell.

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 6:59:10 PM   
Sinergy


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quote:

both physically and in terms of leadership qualities,


I have issues with this sentence in terms of the last comment.

In a hunter-gatherer and hand-to-hand combat warlike situation, the leaders would end up being the people who could defeat everybody else in combat.

To me, this is a somewhat phallo-centric argument. Sure, I could beat up Joan of Arc, but could I successfully lead a seige of the city of Orleans?

In a world where fighting and conquest and rape and pillage and cheerleaders and (FOCUS SINERGY) the examples of women showing "leadership qualities" in the paradigm of leading armies to sack the city of Orleans are few, and rare, and easily explained away as coincidences.

Does this necessarily make women less leaders?

Men in the British Navy or the Greek army or the modern day reserve army in the United States might be away from home for years at a time at the behest of their commanders or the Simian-In-Chief. During this time, Command of the Home Front is taken care of by the women they left behind. Bills are paid, children are raised, the second income of the family ensures that life carries on as it was when the man was not gallivanting all over the place killing whomever, things are taken care of.

Many women organize in groups to ensure that the children of their respective families are carpooled to school. They actively work to make things better for their families. Some get involved in local politics. While these activities dont generally result in a city surrounded by a bunch of decapitated heads on pikes, does that make them less of a great example of leadership qualities?

JM, CBW, BTYG,

Sinergy

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 7:04:23 PM   
Leonidas


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Leadership qualities in the context that we were talking about wouild simply mean able to inspire other men to fight with you. Some women would be able to lead that way. Some women in history did. Joan did. It's exceptional. It's not impossible. Just exceptional

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 7:36:18 PM   
Sinergy


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quote:

Leadership qualities in the context that we were talking about wouild simply mean able to inspire other men to fight with you. Some women would be able to lead that way. Some women in history did. Joan did. It's exceptional. It's not impossible. Just exceptional


This comment is specific and to the point.

quote:


both physically and in terms of leadership qualities,


This comment is not.

I agree with you. In a world largely run by men who could beat up other men, aka a patriarchal warlike society, a woman does not stand much chance of scrabbling her way to the top of the bar-fight. History bears this out with the paucity of female army commanders.

I simply dont think that that sort of kindergarten, Saddam-Hussein-worldview, peurile king-of-the-hill world is one I want to spend much time living in. Seems to me that humanity should have done something more with the consciousness they have been given than killing each other.

Mother Theresa had fabulous leadership qualities and I dont recall her killing anybody.

But, as usual, that is just me and I could be wrong.

Sinergy

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 8:06:21 PM   
Leonidas


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What we should do isn't always so clear. An absolute definition of duty depends on being able to see all ends. Mother Theresa may have had the right idea, and maybe not. The road behind us, and how we made it to the top of the food chain is fairly clear to see, unless you want to change it to suit you. All we know about the road ahead is that we can either be true to what we have always been, or try to become something else. Which path you prefer really depends on your basic fundamental definition of "good". Our minds can conjure many arguments about what we should do, and what is desireable. You may be right. The pugnacious, proud, strong, agressive male may have seen his best days. It could be that men should let women rule. Maybe we should become well fed bonobos in khakis (a process well underway), and let the Ms Abzugs of the world take a shot at making the stream green, and safe and fair for everyone. It could be our salvation, or it could be our ultimate undoing. I don't know that anyone is wise enough to tell, but I suspect that it is a deeper question than you may have considered.

It's interesting that you think Sadam and not Churchill or Eisenhower when you think of a "king of the hill". It is a sentiment with which I am familliar.

< Message edited by Leonidas -- 8/19/2004 6:40:13 AM >


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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 8:39:04 PM   
NoCalOwner


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Leonidas

quote:

Tacitus, in putting a pre-battle speech into the mouth of the Roman general Suetonius, said that there were more women than men in Boudica's army.


I might have said the same in a pre-battle speech to my men. Tacitus didn't happen to mention whether the men cheered or laughed at this particular revelation, did he? "We're facing a bunch of women" sounds like a good pre-battle morale booster to me, especially at a time when women were just spoils of war.

Indeed. Despite the fact that women, from slaves to those of high birth, sometimes fought in Roman arenas, there is no doubt that his statement was an appeal to, well, the sexism of the legionnaires. He also pointed out that the Iceni were badly equipped. Just the same, we have to take most Roman historians with a huge grain of salt, as so many things they say are obviously exaggerated, or are really veiled commentaries on Roman society. When in The Germania we are told that Germanic men are extremely proud and brave, and their women of unblemished virtue, what we are really being told is that the author considers the men of Rome to be cowardly and without pride, and Roman women to sleep around far too much. Tacitus goes on to say that less than 10,000 legionnaires go into that battle and slaughter 80,000 of the Iceni, while taking only 400 casualties themselves. I call BS on Tacitus.
quote:


quote:

Ammianus Marcellinus said that Gaulish women were even stronger than their husbands, and makes them sound like very skilled streetfighters.


Again, I might have said the same. You have to remember that to the ears of the listener of the time "your women are stronger than you are" would have been a damn good insult, and quite possibly would have elicited a belly-laugh in the reader.



Possible, although I tend to think it improbable. Aside from a blatant dislike for Christianity, Ammianus is considered to be to most fact-oriented and objective of ancient historians, less biased than Tacitus or Livy. From Suetonius I'd expect jokes and jibes. If Ammianus Marcellinus said it, he probably meant it, in my opinion.
quote:


quote:

In 102 AD, Plutarch said, describing a battle with the Celts: "the fight had been no less fierce with the women than with the men themselves... the women charged with swords and axes and fell upon their opponents uttering a hideous outcry."


Now this I do remember reading. Wasn't the context of this attack by the women the victorious romans attempting to enter the Celt camp and, um, enjoy the fruits of conquest?

Not quite, but the fault for your mistake may be mine. I said 102 AD, I meant 102 BC. Plutarch was writing about the first part of the battle of Aquae Sextiae, the last of many fought over several centuries between the Romans and the Ambrones. The Ambrones were finally beaten and annexed, forming the province of Cisalpine Gaul. According to "The Life of Marius," it went like this... the Ambrones had the men in the vanguard, and the women as the rear guard and protecting the camp. The men were divided while crossing a river, and the Ligurian forces on the Roman side took advantage of the situation and attacked, inflicting heavy losses. The men were routed, and tried to retreat through the women. The women would have none of that: "Here the women met them, swords and axes in their hands, and with hideous shrieks of rage tried to drive back fugitives and pursuers alike, the fugitives as traitors, and the pursuers as foes; they mixed themselves up with the combatants, with bare hands tore away the shields of the Romans or grasped their swords, and endured wounds and mutilations, their fierce spirits unvanquished to the end."
quote:


Bodica inherited her kingdom from her dead husband, and was publically flogged, and her daughters raped by the Romans, yes? This was an outrage that started a rebellion. It's not as if she and her daughters were warrior princesses in their own right. They became symbols of revolt. Am I remembering this wrong? It's been a while since I read about it.

That's pretty much correct. Her husband had hoped to appease the Romans by leaving his half of his land to the Romans in his will, dividing the other half between his two daughters. The local Roman troops were totally undisciplined, and as soon as they heard of the husband's death, they went on a rampage of killing and pillaging (nice way to treat your new property, eh?). They also enslaved relatives of the deceased king, and committed any number of other atrocities. This led to the war in which 70,000 Roman citizens and sympathizers were allegedly killed, London conquered and looted, etc. I don't think that you can write them off as "symbols" rather than "warriors" however, since Boudica was regent of the Iceni during the minority of her daughters, who were heirs to half a kingdom. I see them more as the surviving leaders of the Iceni, who did what leaders might be expected to do under the circumstances. It's not like Boudica learned to drive a war chariot overnight. If you look at the fall of most of the Bronze Age cultures of the Mediterranean to the People of the Sea in 1200-1100 BC, it was because the established civilizations relied almost totally on war chariots, and a handful of highly skilled, well equipped, and thus very expensive charioteers. Most of these soldiers were on a first name basis with the rulers they served. They were like the heavy cavalry of the high middle ages. They were defeated by a new approach to warfare -- huge throngs of spearmen and archers, very cheaply equipped and minimally trained. Training for war charioteers, or knights, took years. "Boudicca, in a [chariot], with her two daughters before her, drove through the ranks. She harangued the different nations in their turn: 'This,' she said, 'is not the first time that the Britons have been led to battle by a woman.'" (Annals of Tacitus, Book XIV, Ch. 35)

There have been a number of burials found in Celtic countries (Gaul and Scythia for example) where the skeletons of women were found with swords, bows, armor and the bones of their horses. Chariots too, in some cases. Here's a fine example, a woman's breastplate from the land of the Belgae (Netherlands) around 1000 BC.
http://www.lothene.demon.co.uk/others/cuirass.jpg

Or consider that CuChulainn was supposed to have been trained in the arts of war by Queen Scathach of Skye, had a son by Aoife, a female warrior, and had as his main adversaries Queen Medb of Cruachan and her warrior sisters. Myth it may be, but scores of generations of Irish folk seem to have had no problem with the idea of women leaders with spears in their hands.
quote:


You probably have a much better understanding of these things than I do. I'll have to go back and look at the roman sources again. You bring up some interesting things. I'm very curious as to their context.

Hope I managed to clear up context of the Roman stuff sufficiently. I'm not trying to change your mind about anything, really. I'd be the first to admit that, through the vast majority of recorded history, men have had the upper hand. But I'm not going to argue with anyone who believes that male dominance is not some immutable, natural law. Isn't the existence of religion a fairly compelling bit of evidence that most of the human race, regardless of gender, seem to feel the need to have some giant Dom/me taking care of us? Or look at the sheeplike way that voters act a lot of the time -- in the US, I think that this applies to men even more than to women. It is the really DANGEROUS side of submissiveness, since most people do not even realize quite what it is that they are doing. I'll close with a quote which I've found worthy of a great deal of thought over the years. It doesn't have anything valid to say about the role of gender in my opinion -- the author was very sexist by almost any standards -- but it has LOADS to say about human nature, the dangers of uncritically submitting, and the character of the person who said it. Think about this one next time you're headed off to (get *used* at) the polls, folks.

"The psyche of the broad masses does not respond to anything weak or half-way. Like a woman, whose spiritual sensitiveness is determined less by abstract reason than by an indefinable emotional longing for fulfilling power and who, for that reason, prefers to submit to the strong rather than the weakling - the mass, too, prefers the ruler to a pleader." -- Mein Kampf

< Message edited by NoCalOwner -- 8/18/2004 10:52:27 PM >

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 9:32:54 PM   
WayHome


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quote:

Yes, WayHome, you do seem to pick your spots here.


That apears to be some sort of jibe but I don't think I understand it. Are you saying that there is some sort of obligation or merrit in slogging through every single thread on collarme regardless of whether it relates to me or anything I'm interested in at all? That would mean that poeple with jobs and real lives would have no business here at all.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leonidas

....be so cynical as to preach equality and then put men in a yolk and harness their strength and agression to do the ugly work of war for them. They can, that is, if they have some good men protecting them while they do it. I'm not sure why you, as a man, would accept such a yolk willingly. Maybe it's something you learned from the bonobos, or Dr. Farrell.


Surely you wrote this in haste. Any warrior of principle accepts such a yoke (nothing to do with eggs) whether it be that of a man or a woman or of a principle. Not do do so is simply to be a thug or military dictator. I'm sure that's not what you are advocating but in your haste to belittle me you have painted with a rather wide brush. Why would a "real man" warrior like Stormin Norman or Patton yoke himself to the whims of a civilian congress when he has the power to dominate. Because he is a man of principle, that's why.

You have mentioned bonobos many times since I first brought them up, still without understanding enough about them to utilize them as a representaqtion of anything. You also seem to have overlooked my description of Warren Farrel, since he is not a feminist and was probably the man against which Robin Morgan's quote was directed. The book I mentioned was in fact a criticism of feminism. You should read it. It's full of insight about power and lack of, as well as the subtle influence of social conditioning and how we fall into patterns of behavior.

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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 11:09:45 PM   
Leonidas


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quote:

"Here the women met them, swords and axes in their hands, and with hideous shrieks of rage tried to drive back fugitives and pursuers alike, the fugitives as traitors, and the pursuers as foes; they mixed themselves up with the combatants, with bare hands tore away the shields of the Romans or grasped their swords, and endured wounds and mutilations, their fierce spirits unvanquished to the end."


Yes, this is the same, I just had the facts mixed up a bit. It's been a few years. The women were defending the camp. I had forgotten about the men trying to flee through them. Again, you don't see in this just a little bit of "the men were pussies, even their women had more guts"? In reading many of those accounts, I got the sense, like you did with the Germanic accounts, that there was some meaning beyond the literal. In this case, could the point have been to belittle the enemy as much as anything else?

< Message edited by Leonidas -- 8/18/2004 11:27:55 PM >


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RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 11:42:11 PM   
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Misogyny is at best very boring. Implicit in "acting out" on disdain or hatred for women is that W/we should care what H/he thinks. In this way the guy who has a temper tantrum when told "no, thank you" is very similar to the teenagers who lean out their car to yell at women they think are "fat", "old", "ugly", "gay" or "whore".

It's a crime of opportunity. They are certain that no repercussions are possible. There is certainly hatred there that reduces a woman to a "target". But there's also entitlement, adrenaline, sour grapes, male-bonding (peer approval) and weird ego tripping.

--Goddess

(in reply to Leonidas)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Misogyny - 8/18/2004 11:56:33 PM   
goddess97440


Posts: 33
Joined: 6/30/2004
Status: offline
Has anyone else noticed the "pick-up lines" that are actually hostile? This is particularly a trend with poorly socialized men, whether vanilla or kinky. It starts with 1) a superlative unbelievable compliment quickly moves to 2) a crude invitation to sex that it supposed to be flattering but is usually suggested in such a way as to make even your favorite activities unappetizing. (Some guys skip the unbelievable compliment and begin the conversation with "I want to eat your pussy")

"No, thank you" is met with 3) why? why? why? 4)the pity me ploy "I haven't had sex in 50 years" and then finally 5) the completely hostile "you think you're too good for me!"

But #5 rather than being a parting shot with Lothario storming away, seems to be yet another back-assed courting ritual... he seems to think he can INTIMIDATE you into capitulation. "No, no. I'm not stuck up. Let me fellate you to prove it."

I find this routine all too common... and amazing, even among professed submissive men. Particularly in person, where you can't "block" the sender of an offensive pass, I have seen friends forced to invent ridiculous vows of celibacy, imaginary jealous husbands, religious mania in the hopes of repelling an obnoxious suitor.

--Goddess

(in reply to Leonidas)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Misogyny - 8/19/2004 12:07:36 AM   
Leonidas


Posts: 2078
Joined: 2/16/2004
Status: offline
quote:

That apears to be some sort of jibe but I don't think I understand it. Are you saying that there is some sort of obligation or merrit in slogging through every single thread on collarme regardless of whether it relates to me or anything I'm interested in at all? That would mean that poeple with jobs and real lives would have no business here at all.


No, it's fine, jump right in when the flow suits you. Jump back out when it doesn't. Glad to have you around.

quote:

A woman could, I guess, be so cynical as to preach equality and then put men in a yolk and harness their strength and agression to do the ugly work of war for them. They can, that is, if they have some good men protecting them while they do it. I'm not sure why you, as a man, would accept such a yolk willingly. Maybe it's something you learned from the bonobos, or Dr. Farrell.


You snipped that a little short. I fixed it for you. So you responded:

quote:

Surely you wrote this in haste. Any warrior of principle accepts such a yoke (nothing to do with eggs) whether it be that of a man or a woman or of a principle. Not do do so is simply to be a thug or military dictator. I'm sure that's not what you are advocating but in your haste to belittle me you have painted with a rather wide brush. Why would a "real man" warrior like Stormin Norman or Patton yoke himself to the whims of a civilian congress when he has the power to dominate. Because he is a man of principle, that's why.


No, I didn't write hastily, but I think that you might have been skimming for something to attack, rather than thinking. I'll be more explicit. If a woman spends her life condemning male dominance and agression as evil, equating men who display those traits with rapists, and then turns around and sends you to war, using the very traits that she condems when it suits her, that would be rather cynical. If you were to suffer that kind of action gladly, first accepting that those things in you were evil, and then taking on the yoke that this woman would put on you as an unworthy dumb brute that is only fit for cannon fodder, you wouldn't be a warrior of principal, you'd be a slave. There is honor in allegence. In slavery there is none. It's alright, the difference is lost on most men these days.

quote:

You have mentioned bonobos many times since I first brought them up, still without understanding enough about them to utilize them as a representaqtion of anything.


I happily confess to knowing almost nothing about them except what you have said. They live in female dominant societies where sex is the currency of power, not violence. In other words, they are absolutely nothing like us. They are just another specious example of what we "should" be like that you bought. If they were like us, we would have the celebacy penalty, instead of the death penalty, and a good number of Iraqis would be still be around. They'd just be really horney.

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Leonidas

(in reply to WayHome)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Misogyny - 8/19/2004 7:26:13 AM   
Leonidas


Posts: 2078
Joined: 2/16/2004
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quote:

Hope I managed to clear up context of the Roman stuff sufficiently. I'm not trying to change your mind about anything, really. I'd be the first to admit that, through the vast majority of recorded history, men have had the upper hand. But I'm not going to argue with anyone who believes that male dominance is not some immutable, natural law.


I thank you, sincerely, for taking the time to write what you have. It's always a pleasure to converse with someone who knows what they are talking about. I for one know better than to think that anything about human beings is immutable. On the contrary, I'm fairly sure that we can talk ourselves and each other into just about anything. For example, the shakers are all gone now, but they were able to convince each other that sex was a bad idea. Communism is on the wane, but it was a social experiment that had a good deal of currency for a long time. Its practitioners were certain that humans should share and share alike. Nobody should be rich, and nobody should be needy. It certainly sounds right and just, and good. As Ms. Abzug would say, it was a big green stream that's fair to everyone. The only problem was that humans didn't like it much. They got complacent, fatalistic, unproductive, and bitter.

I see the same going on with some social experiments that we hold a little more dear than communism. A society where dominance is sexless and masculine strength is something ignoble to be dishonored and discouraged in favor of more intellectual definitions of strength so that we can all be equal certainly seems right, and fair and just. As with communism, though, I'm not sure that humans like it much. As a nation, we're getting fat, and complacent and distracted. The sexes are losing interest in each other. Our women walk around obese and unkempt and talk about their men as if they are just another child in the house for which they have to care. Our men cast about for some role to play, not really knowing what to do. So they sit and stare blankly at a box that teaches them to associate the desire for beautiful women with.... yep..... beer. Good boy, you train well, have another six pack. In a generation, our cultural icons have gone from Matt Dillon, who protected an entire town from some pretty tough characters, to "Tim the Tool Man Taylor" whose own wife and children have to keep from hurting himself and burning down the house.

So, no, nothing about humans is immutable, except perhaps our unique ability to conjure up definitions of right once in a while that go against our nature. Each experiment has its time, gets disproven, and supplanted. Maybe we'll get it right one of these days.

< Message edited by Leonidas -- 8/19/2004 9:36:56 AM >


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Leonidas

(in reply to NoCalOwner)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Misogyny - 8/19/2004 11:50:16 AM   
jillwfsub4blkdom


Posts: 375
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Nothing wrong with this, if a woman is a good leader, and understands the realities involved. I think that a woman who does is the rare exception.


Leonidas,
How can You say that it is a rare exception to have a woman as a good leader? There have been a number of female leaders recently who have been very good. It almost sounds like You discount them based on sex alone


quote:

It's always a pleasure to converse with someone who knows what they are talking about.



Leonidas does that mean the rest of us are babbling idiots on this board?

_____________________________


"It's the moment that transcends
Our physical into a more spiritual level of understanding" - Musiq

(in reply to Leonidas)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Misogyny - 8/19/2004 12:04:57 PM   
Leonidas


Posts: 2078
Joined: 2/16/2004
Status: offline
quote:

How can You say that it is a rare exception to have a woman as a good leader? There have been a number of female leaders recently who have been very good. It almost sounds like You discount them based on sex alone


Good leaders, or good politicians? Hillary Clinton has supernatural political instincts, but she couldn't lead her way out of a broom closet if it had a neon exit sign. I don't discount them on sex, only ability. We were talking about someone like Boudica, or Elizabeth, or Joan of Arc, who could inspire allegence in men and lead them to war. I don't see many of those. They are exceedingly rare. For what it's worth, there are plenty of male politicians around who don't know how to lead either. Some of them spent their war years defending texas from oklahoma. People like that tend to make really shitty decisions at crucial times in the interests of making themselves look tough.

quote:

Leonidas does that mean the rest of us are babbling idiots on this board?


I haven't been around here long enough for you to know that I would call you an idiot if that is what I thought? I was complimenting someone, not slighting everyone else.

< Message edited by Leonidas -- 8/19/2004 12:14:55 PM >


_____________________________

Take care of yourself

Leonidas

(in reply to jillwfsub4blkdom)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Misogyny - 8/19/2004 1:54:32 PM   
jillwfsub4blkdom


Posts: 375
Joined: 7/2/2004
Status: offline
Leonidas,
i beg to differ with You in regards to female leaders. i just did a quick google search and found two links You might find of interest. Just off of the top of my head i could think of Indira Ghandi, Golda Meir, and Margaret Thatcher. The links below will show You the information.


http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Lobby/4642/
http://peoplespot.com/features/womenworldleaders.htm

_____________________________


"It's the moment that transcends
Our physical into a more spiritual level of understanding" - Musiq

(in reply to Leonidas)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Misogyny - 8/19/2004 2:04:33 PM   
Leonidas


Posts: 2078
Joined: 2/16/2004
Status: offline
I'm aware of all of those women, jill. Mrs Ghandi was a decent stateswoman, though she seemed to be prone to croniism and was dogged by some scandals. Golda was Golda, and a fine woman to be sure, but she knew enough to know that she needed a Moshe Dlan to play a role for which she was not suited. Maggie Thatcher too was a fine woman, and a match for most men when it came to having a dominant character. Any one of these women would be a fine alternative to George W., but Maggie Thatcher herself said point blank that she would have been no match for Churchill. Are we producing generations or more capable women, or weaker men? Do you want your men to step up, or step back and be equal?

< Message edited by Leonidas -- 8/19/2004 2:16:26 PM >


_____________________________

Take care of yourself

Leonidas

(in reply to jillwfsub4blkdom)
Profile   Post #: 100
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