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Lone ranger and Tonto - 10/27/2008 10:52:37 PM

knees2you

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The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep. Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, 'Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see?'

'The Lone Ranger replies, 'I see millions of stars.'

'What that tell you?' asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, 'Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?'

'You dumber than buffalo crap. It means someone stole the tent.

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 10/27/2008 11:16:03 PM

MadAxeman

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There'll be hell tepee over this.

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 10/28/2008 1:45:46 PM

persephonee

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadAxeman

There'll be hell tepee over this.

lmao

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 10/28/2008 2:15:09 PM

SteelofUtah

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LMAO.

Kemo Sabe = Horses Ass.

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 11/11/2008 11:07:44 PM

rosanegra

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You know... I saw the same joke on vajoe.com not too long ago, only tonto was a command sgt. major, and the lone ranger was a brigade commander.

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 11/11/2008 11:14:49 PM

zakkan

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Oh there are many versions of it. My favorite is Sherlock Holmes with Watson, ending with the famous quote.

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 11/12/2008 12:25:06 AM

lilmissdefiant

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lol I like it, zakkan whats the version you've heard?
I would like to hear it :)

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 11/12/2008 2:58:42 AM

zakkan

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Well, its pretty much the same dialogue, with Holmes asking the question and Watson talking.

"No, it means our tent's blown away."

"Goodness, Holmes!"

"Elementary, my dear Watson."

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 11/12/2008 3:16:57 AM

MadAxeman

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The Lone Ranger and Tonto come out of a clearing and find themselves before a plain as far as the eye can see. After riding for half a day they crest a peak and see an encampment of Sioux, preparing for battle. Quietly retracing their steps they see in the distance the dust from thousands of braves on horseback approaching to link up for the war party. They look South, East and West. In each direction there are advancing angry Indians. The Lone Ranger turns to Tonto and says
Well my old friend, it looks like we are in trouble.
Tonto looks into the Lone Rangers eyes and replies
What do you mean 'we' white man?

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RE: Lone ranger and Tonto - 11/12/2008 7:27:30 AM

darchChylde

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The Lone Ranger/Tonto form of the snakebite joke (where the Lone Ranger is bitten on the penis and the poison must be sucked out) ended with the classic line "You're on your own, white man."

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