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slavegirljoy -> RE: -=Submissives need to be told what to do. Slaves need ...=- (11/13/2008 2:34:35 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
In discussing the realities of ownership I have said that “My dog is my slave and I own it, I can prove it. I have a sales receipt. I cannot say the same about my slave.” In looking at the tangible realities between negotiated D/s authority vs the M/s absolute authority (defined as ownership by most), the D/s crowd often states that they are the same and nit picking over the degree of authority to define different lifestyles becomes arbitrary.
To me it becomes like a case of measuring loyalty.
I do not think the M/s community will advance in conveying an understanding of what makes them/us tick as long as “ownership” is used to define their feelings. I think we have to modify our outlook and truly define the extent the importance of “authority” has to make the rest of the BDSM community gain insight into what makes us tick.
Just a couple of thoughts about what you have written.
1) The dogs in this house are not slaves to anyone. i am a slave to our dogs, not the other way around. i serve their needs all day long, especially the 2 big dogs who are both still young, full of energy, run around the backyard getting filthy, hungry and tired, then come inside, tracking their dirt in with them, which i must clean up after, feed them, give them plenty of fresh water throughout the day, pet them, brush them, clean their teeth and ears, help my Master bathe them and clip their nails and make them feel valued and loved. Having these dogs has quadrupled my daily workload. The papers say that i am their owner. Master listed me as their owner on their paperwork. But, they own me. They are loyal to me and my Master but, He and i are also loyal to them. If we weren't, we would have gotten rid of them after they chewed up several pairs of shoes, hats, a very nice cane and the sofa. They do listen to me, somewhat, and they will sit and come, when i tell them to. But, that's because i bribe them with treats.
2) To me, the difference between a relationship that involves a Dominant and a submissive, compared to one that involves a Master and a slave, depends on the people involved. In my case, my Master has more power and control over me because He wants more power and control over me. As His slave, i am no more submissive or loyal or obedient than i have been with every other man i have ever been involved with, whether they were dominant over me or not. If any of the men in my previous relationships had chosen to exert more control over me, they could have. As it was, i served them as much as they wanted me to serve them and they liked that but, they just didn't want to be the boss of me the way my Master does.
Similarly, being married doesn't mean there is more commitment or loyalty in the relationship. There are couples who live together for many years without ever getting married but, they are every bit (or more so) committed to each other as they would be if they had a marriage license. And, there are people who are married to each other but, barely have anything to do with each other and seem to care very little about each other. They barely talk to each other or do anything together and probably wouldn't really miss the other if they were suddenly gone.
Regardless of what terms they choose to describe their relationship, whether D/s or M/s, it really just depends on the people involved and what they put into the relationship and what they wish to get out of the relationship.
3) Negotiation exists in the relationship i have with my Master, even though when I entered into this relationship with Him, i surrendered to Him my "right to choose" or make my own decisions or to say "no". Of course, He has the final say in everything but, there is still open dialog between us and the opportunity for me to discuss ideas with Him and to make requests, etc., even if it results in a change in our 'normal' way of doing things. That doesn't mean that He gives up any power over me. It just means that, as new situations arise, adjustments sometimes need to be made, in order for our relationship to remain strong, healthy, viable, stimulating, and satisfying to both of us.
4) What makes me tick is unique to me, whether i am a slave to another or not. i don't "tick" like every other slave or anyone else, for that matter. We are all unique, whether we happen to call ourselves slaves, submissives, kinksters, BDSM'ers or whatever. We may have some interests in common but, that doesn't make us all tick the same.
joy
Owned servant of Master David
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