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TEXANS - 11/2/2008 10:21:50 PM

maskedsow

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TEXANS

A Texan went to Chicago and thought he would buy a new "city" outfit. He went into Marshall Fields and when asked by a sweet young woman if she could help him, answered, "Yes ma'am. Ya see, I'm from Texas and I want to buy a complete outfit."

"Well," her eyes lit up as she asked, "Where you would like to start?"

"Well, ma'am, how about a suit?" "Yes, sir ... What size?" "Size 53 ... tall, ma'am" "Wow ... That's really big."

"Yes, ma'am ... They really grow them big in Texas."

"What's next?" she asked. He replied, "How's about some shoes?" "What size?" "Size 15 ... double D." "Wow ... That's really big!"

"Yes, ma'am ... They really grow them big in Texas."

"What's next?" "Well, ... I reckon I'll need a shirt." "Yes, sir ... what size?" "Nineteen and a half ... 38," he replied.

"Wow ... That's really big!" "Yes, ma'am ... They really grow them big in Texas."

"Will there be anything else?" she crooned. "Yes, ma'am, I expect I'll need a hat." "Yes, sir, what size?" "Nine and five-eights." "Wow ... That's really big!"

"Yes, ma'am ... They really grow them big in Texas." She virtually glowed as she asked, "Whew ... is there anything else I can do for you?" "No ma'am, I reckon that will be all."

Well, the sweet young thing tallied up his bill and as the Texan was counting out his money ... Then she worked up some nerve and asked, "Sir, could I ask you... er... a ... question?"

"Yes, ma'am, I already know what it is ... and the answer is ... four inches." She is astonished and blurts out indignantly, "Why, my boyfriend is bigger than that!"

Without so much as a stutter the Texan replied, "Across, ma'am?"

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RE: TEXANS - 11/3/2008 7:31:26 AM

BlackPhx

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LOL Knew someone built like that

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RE: TEXANS - 11/3/2008 8:19:12 AM

MarksFantasyGirl

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I knew a guy that said all the time "I got a 6 inch C*ck...... AROOOOOOOUND!!!!"

It of course was a complete lie, but I have found that MOST guys that talk about how big it is, are usually lying... and those that don't brag... well, that's who I sleep with...... :-D HEHEHE

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RE: TEXANS - 11/3/2008 8:02:01 PM

BlackPhx

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Yeah but I actually SAW this one...trust me he wasn't bragging, not amny women are even interested in trying on a monster like he had, unless they were drunk or into fisting.

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RE: TEXANS - 11/3/2008 8:17:48 PM

MadAxeman

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Yup, I'm cursed...sob

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RE: TEXANS - 11/4/2008 5:22:50 PM

FourQ

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I give the same response every time. Each time the topic turns to the size of someone's package, I cup myself and announce proudly...
"You should see mine............. I'm hung like an ant!"

It's usually enough to change the topic of conversation.

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RE: TEXANS - 11/4/2008 10:13:13 PM

hizgeorgiapeach

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A buddy of mine (who's actually quite well hung) consistantly tells people who ask that he's hung like a rampant field mouse...

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RE: TEXANS - 11/5/2008 11:39:55 AM

MarksFantasyGirl

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My one ex used to say he was "hung like a horse"...... And quietly add "fly" HAHA! I loved it! But that really wasn't all that far from the truth... lmao...

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RE: TEXANS - 11/7/2008 2:21:27 AM

sirsholly

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RE: TEXANS - 11/7/2008 3:42:39 AM

persephonee

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Come...ere Axey....sit next to me.

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RE: TEXANS - 11/7/2008 7:37:37 AM

SteelofUtah

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Sadly I was given a Standard Issue White Mans Penis. AKA The Irish Curse

So I figured if just showing it wasn't gunna impress anyone I should probably learn to use it.

To date I have never recieved a complaint and everyone came back for seconds.

Steel

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RE: TEXANS - 11/7/2008 7:42:37 AM

MarksFantasyGirl

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Most guys don't believe me, but I still agree that it's not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean.... seriously, it doesn't matter if you're hung like a horse or you have to use tweezers and pepper to get ahold of it... if you can work it, that's all that matters... and if you can't, you make up for it....

Wish I could convince a few people of that....

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