How do I meet the first one?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

How do I meet the first one?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> How do I meet the first one?

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 4:38:01 PM

curiousinKY

Posts: 13
Joined: 4/11/2008
Status: offline

I have been on this site for a few weeks now and i always get the suggestion to get into the local community. Well I have a life and can not meet with them all the time to learn. Is there anyone on here that has learned about it or meet someone in a different way?

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 4:51:46 PM

monywildcat

Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline

I would suggest googling some reading material say, from amazon.com, browse the message boards here, and keep in mind that porn is NOT a documentary. And while its perfectly understandable that you have a real life to tend to (I am pretty sure we all do) making some time to get out there and meet people in real life certainly couldn't hurt in gaining some hands-on experience. Every now and then as your schedule allows.

Oh, and welcome to the dark side, we have punch and cookies...

Edited to add first meet info: the play partners that I have been with, I met these through word of mouth, one of which pointed me to this site. Met Daddy in 3rd grade. There are others here that have met their significant others, pets, subs, doms, etc etc on this site. So go figure. So come on in, the water's fine!

< Message edited by monywildcat -- 11/3/2008 4:53:54 PM >

_____________________________

Major Life Change Necessitates Personal Reinvention...

(in reply to curiousinKY)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 5:11:29 PM

Monkeyontuesday

Posts: 357
Joined: 2/29/2008
Status: offline

Writing decent, if not eloquent, letters will help. There is nothing I despise more than idiotic letters from people who obviously did not read my profile and do not know how to spell ;-)

_____________________________

Make no little plans. There is no magic in them to stir men's blood.

(in reply to monywildcat)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 5:17:31 PM

kiwisub12

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline

You really don't have to spend a lot of time with someone to learn something. Go to a playpart, watch someone scene, and after it , ask them to show you how they did ..... Most people would be happy to show you, and demonstrate and have you return the demo. You would probably get a volunteer demo dummy too. think of it as a party with learning benefits.

Its way easier to learn a skill when you can actually see it demonstrated. Then reading becomes an addendum to the demo.

(in reply to Monkeyontuesday)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 5:52:04 PM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

Sheesh. If you have no time to learn because you have a life, there is not a lot to be done. I have managed to have a life because I learn. I kinda hope you didn't mean what you said, somehow, because that is a sorry state of affairs. If you're looking for a shortcut to life, there ain't one that I am aware of.

(in reply to curiousinKY)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 6:09:10 PM

curiousinKY

Posts: 13
Joined: 4/11/2008
Status: offline

That's not what I meant. It just seems like every time there is a local munch I have something planned. I was just wondering what other choices there are out there

(in reply to antipode)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 6:26:15 PM

JessieMe

Posts: 510
Joined: 6/5/2006
Status: offline

I would imagine that you need to set your priorities. If learning the skills to finding someone is a priority, you make the time for it. If you cant make the time for it, then perhaps it is not as a high a priority as you would like it to be.

Just my nickel's worth. (inflation you know?)

_____________________________

This is who I am
And this is all I know.
That I must choose to live for all that I can give
The spark that makes the Power grow
<Immortality by Celine Dion>

(in reply to curiousinKY)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 6:36:55 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: curiousinKY
That's not what I meant. It just seems like every time there is a local munch I have something planned. I was just wondering what other choices there are out there

It's all about priorities. Munches don't just spring up randomly- PLAN ahead of time to go to one and then go.

Of course, lots of kinky people are not in the community at all, you have to decide what to gain and what to lose.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to curiousinKY)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: How do I meet the first one? - 11/3/2008 6:40:26 PM

lusciouslips19

Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: curiousinKY

That's not what I meant. It just seems like every time there is a local munch I have something planned. I was just wondering what other choices there are out there

You need to learn, to read and to get mentored. Safety is very important. You dont want to get injured or injure someone else.

Since you are a switch i would suggest being submissive first and find an experienced dominant who knows the ins and outs. Then you can feel it from the sub's side and wont forget that when you decide you want to be Dominant. Then as a Dominant find someone to mentor you. Maybe the same person who you sub to will then mentor you. That would be the best route.

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 11/3/2008 6:43:02 PM >

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to curiousinKY)

Profile

Post #: 9