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Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/18/2005 6:26:12 PM   
Redb


Posts: 41
Joined: 1/19/2005
Status: offline 		Just a question for the Doms... have any of you ever had a sub for a long time (years rather than months) who then realised she was Domme ??

Did you remain in touch ? If so, How did the relationship develop, what sort of dynamic do you have now ?

How do you feel about it all...

Thanks

< Message edited by Redb -- 12/18/2005 6:29:49 PM >

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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/18/2005 6:58:01 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Redb

Just a question for the Doms... have any of you ever had a sub for a long time (years rather than months) who then realised she was Domme ??

Did you remain in touch ? If so, How did the relationship develop, what sort of dynamic do you have now ?

How do you feel about it all...

Thanks


I think your subject title is wrong. What you are describing is a change that may have little or nothing to do with the person's partner... hardly a "breaking."

When I met Libby she thought she was a "pure" submissive, but after spending time with me and exploring the public scene, over years, she developed her dominant aspects until now I'm the only person she feels submissive to and she is actively dominant to quite a number of others from casual play with some to the intense and long-lasting interaction with her personal slave Rio.

Over the twelve years we've been together nmuch has changed in our relationship and I've celebrated the expansion of her interests and talents.


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(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/18/2005 8:20:42 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline 		I've broken a few hearts in the past but never physicaly broken a sub.
Sometimes, rough play has lead to a poped joint or some other pain which was unexpected but not life threatining or in need of hospital care. As far as ending a D/s relationship, it works like all the others. Someone ends it and then you either stay friends, fuck buddies, or you never see each other again. The main draw back in breaking up a relationship in the life style is that it's very likely to continue seeing each other at munches, clubs, and BDSM events. When the two of you are both in one organization, neither one may not want to leave. In the case of ending on BAD TERMS, there can be alot of political BS over the break up if both of you try to keep the same friends and stay in the local scene.

Though I'm not sure what your situation is or why you are asking this question but as stated before, a break up is a break up. In many of my cases, the relationship was purely over and I ended up moving on. Now if my pet Liltxsubby ever decided to leave me, I would pack my bags and go where she was at. She's wouldn't be able to get rid of me that easy.


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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/18/2005 10:24:17 PM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		Nope. My Subs have all been Subs through and through and wouldn't have it any other way.

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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/19/2005 3:07:27 AM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		i personally don't have a dominant bone in my body, maybe a mischevious side , but i doubt id ask my Owner if i could top others, it simply isn't me.

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/19/2005 5:39:05 AM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		I've broke a few subs in and have broke some weak plastic handled spoons on some sub's asses, but that's about it.

I have found my submissives to bend (over ) but not break.
Peace, Kevin

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Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/19/2005 9:34:54 AM   
MasterLark


Posts: 249
Joined: 5/12/2005
Status: offline 		Never had a sub for years who then became a Domme. Some have toyed with the thought of being a Domme but when the dust settled, stayed where their submissive desires were. Were a sub become a Domme over time that would be a natural evolution, not a sudden break or an overnight flash of enlightenment.

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/19/2005 2:12:29 PM   
Webmaster60


Posts: 396
Joined: 9/10/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Just a question for the Doms... have any of you ever had a sub for a long time (years rather than months) who then realised she was Domme ??


NOPE
If my slave suddenly becomes "domme".. either she has lost her mind, or I have failed miserably as a Master.

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Master Michael
~~~~~~~~~~
"To sin in silence when he should
speak makes cowards of men"

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/19/2005 9:08:34 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

have any of you ever had a sub for a long time (years rather than months) who then realised she was Domme ??



Oh she decides to want to go dom eh? Will she want to try and controll me or feel like controlling other people? After all, pet can be very aggressive when dealing with other people. It's me that she's submissive to. If she's trying to controll me, well thats just one of her ways in asking for a spanking.

In the life style, there are many sadisitc submissives. Many of them have a back bone and can bite back rather than just bark. As a Dom, it's important to keep them in line before they try to walk all over you. So is she a Domme or just trying to be a Domme? It's very possible for my sub to Dominate other people, just not me. It just so happens that my sub does not like being in controll. However, she's a take charge kind of person when you let her. Due to some of her past experiences, she's had to take charge of various situationsa and has the idea that "If I don't do it, it won't get done." For us, this type of attitude pops up every now and then. I end up having to say "NO! I will take care of it" Sometimes she'll pout about it but will end up finding herself glad that she didn't have to be in charge of the situation.

There are many switches who will submit only to there dom but also want some poly so they can have a sub of there own to dominate.

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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/20/2005 5:21:28 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		No I cannot say I have because I am always very careful when I take them down off the shelf---smiles ok ok it's holiday and I'm well---- feeling frisky---

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Mistress Hathor


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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/20/2005 11:16:44 AM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline 		i dont have a Dominant side but i can be sadistic, so while i could never realy deside over anyone, it might be fun to hold the whip a few times.

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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/20/2005 9:22:44 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline 		The subject line vs. what you are reallly asking seem to be two different things entirely. As for breaking a submissive—yes, I have done this. As for my slaves turning "Domme" on me, no. That would never happen.

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/21/2005 4:13:44 AM   
lovingmaster45


Posts: 261
Joined: 9/16/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I think your subject title is wrong. What you are describing is a change that may have little or nothing to do with the person's partner... hardly a "breaking."

When I met Libby she thought she was a "pure" submissive, but after spending time with me and exploring the public scene, over years, she developed her dominant aspects until now I'm the only person she feels submissive to and she is actively dominant to quite a number of others from casual play with some to the intense and long-lasting interaction with her personal slave Rio.


I have had similar experiences. Two of my former submissives are now pro dominants; but still submit to me. I also top 3 female dominants at Black Rose every year. They joke about it; say once a year with me is all they need to scratch their "itch".

To all the posters who have said that it can't happen with them; get over your bad self. It not only can happen, it does happen and I am happy to see the growth and the sense of adventure in my girls. I would hate to ever be so rigid.

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Master Jerry


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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/21/2005 4:10:44 PM   
Redb


Posts: 41
Joined: 1/19/2005
Status: offline 		Ok.. the subject title is misleading... what i meant was has your subbie ever become a Domme.. how did you feel about it... were you proud / annoyed etc.

Loving Master.. i really like your reply... its similar to my ex-Masters attitude. Recently people have been quite disparaging about his skills (he has 25 years experience, 12 lifestyle, incredible man) because i'm now Domme. He brushes it off as he's well above it and is inordinately proud of me but it surprised me that others could be so arrogant.

Thanks for replies :D

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"Would you like your liquorice clicked ???" --- Drunk ex-boyfriend during sex !!

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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/21/2005 8:06:59 PM   
HouseofBear


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/9/2005
Status: offline 		Grinz,

Well, in our situation, Ursa is slave to me, however she is definitely dominant in her lifestyle relationships with others. Quite frankly, I enjoy watching this side of her in action with others.

Bear

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/22/2005 7:35:10 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline 		Nope, I've never broken a submissive... I've always taken very good care of my toys.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Redb

Just a question for the Doms... have any of you ever had a sub for a long time (years rather than months) who then realised she was Domme ??

Did you remain in touch ? If so, How did the relationship develop, what sort of dynamic do you have now ?

How do you feel about it all...

Thanks

Can't say as I've ever had the experience you describe. I do have a friend who was a slave and later gave being a ProDomme a go for awhile. I've also known a couple of switches who later decided they were purely submissive.

People sometimes change, particularly when their beliefs about themselves change. Sometimes a person chooses to be, say a slave for example, because they didn't believe they could be anything else. If that belief changed by one day discovering they could be a switch or a dominant... then they might decide they don't want to be a slave anymore. For me, I look for someone who wants to be a slave and consciously chooses that, not because they think they can't be anything else, but because this is what they desire. That person is making a commitment to a choice about their lifestyle, and they are much more likely to keep it of the long term (say the rest of their life, for example).

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Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/22/2005 10:28:51 AM   
afmvdp


Posts: 494
Joined: 7/10/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Redb

Just a question for the Doms... have any of you ever had a sub for a long time (years rather than months) who then realised she was Domme ??

Did you remain in touch ? If so, How did the relationship develop, what sort of dynamic do you have now ?

How do you feel about it all...

Thanks



Absolutely. In fact being as this was how I came about in the life it is only natural. One of my most submissive and caring submissives is now quite the little fireball Domina and from what I hear is quite in demand. I've had 4 personally who I detected a dominant inner personality in them despite their initial belief in a desire to be a submissive and after training and working with them, I changed my focus and position to that of their mentor rather than their Master and helped them as I was able to better prepare them for their new life.

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/22/2005 12:57:40 PM   
MasterLark


Posts: 249
Joined: 5/12/2005
Status: offline 		Since it appears a number of people here were drawn to the title -- Have you ever broken your sub ?? -- and this thread is really about -- Has your sub ever become a Domme? (or words to that affect) -- perhaps a thread ought to be started on Have you ever broken your sub/slave??

(in reply to Redb)
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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/22/2005 1:53:37 PM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline 		I had a submissive that became Domme not too long back. I knew when we started that she was a switch and that the day would come when she would seek her own submissive. We don't talk much anymore. She's got her busy life and I have mine. Though when we do see each other we sit to catch up. It's nice to see what she has become and that I had a part in it.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

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RE: Have you ever broken your sub ?? - 12/22/2005 5:13:18 PM   
cinnfulhussy


Posts: 135
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline 		Hmmmm. Have I ever broken a sub. Well, never past the point that a little duct tape couldnt fix it!!

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
Profile   Post #: 20
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