The first meet? (Full Version)

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allthatjaz -> The first meet? (11/9/2008 4:54:28 AM)

After reading the post 'LUCK' I thought it would be interesting to find out what happened on that very first meet?

What did you wear? Were you instructed/ or did you instruct that person to wear certain clothes?

Did you make a decision on the first meet that you both wanted to take this somewhere?

How many people did you meet before finding the right one?

Did you play on your first night?

Steve and me only sent one or two mails to each other before chatting on the phone. We then started a bit of text banter and all the time I was still talking to others and I'm sure he was too. I didn't at the time take him very seriously.
He then said he was staying at the Hotel Sheraton room number xxx and wanted room service, Vodka and coke. The next part is perhaps verging on stupidity and I don't recommend people try this because it could of gone awfully wrong.

I showered, slipped on a little black dress and some leather boots, drove up to the Hotel, stopping on the way to buy a small bottle of vodka and some coke.
I knocked on room xxx and said 'room service'... I will always remember that little smirk on his face as I went in and poured his drink, walked over to him and said 'will that be all Sir?'. He said nothing but grabbed my wrist with one hand and tore my dress straight off my back with the other.
We both left the room 12 hours later looking very dishelved but with big grins on our faces and so far we have not looked back.




Twicehappy2x -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 6:20:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

What did you wear? Were you instructed/ or did you instruct that person to wear certain clothes?

Did you make a decision on the first meet that you both wanted to take this somewhere?

How many people did you meet before finding the right one?

Did you play on your first night?


I was wearing a long skirt and matching top, carrying my cat in a box coming off an airplane. They both had on long leather coats and i later found out Scooter was wearing ScoobyDo boxers, which are now officially known as his domly drawers. 
 
I knew the instant Scooter kissed me that yes, absolutely this was the right One. 
 
I honestly lost track of how many folks i met there were so many.
 
No we did play/scene until i was collared but we were only in the house about twenty minutes before we were fucking like rabbits. Weg, i am happy to say that hasn't slowed down any after three years. 




JustDarkness -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 6:25:15 AM)

I don't meet easily with people..I really have t connect.
When we do meet...I do dress nicely...cut my nails..get a hair cut. I shave..if she wants too ;)
Normally the first tiem we meet soemwhere in the middle. A public place..to eat and drink.
I try to let her be herself...let her lead in what she wants. Don't want to coem accross as pushy.
Sometimes a worry about little thinks..kiss her..or shake her hand. But mostly I worry about those things...and they kiss me full on the mouth..lol
The metings I had..felt like we knew eachother for ages already.
And we did...mmm fumble around....not "play" BDSm. Although when it connects...I get dominant with her...and she allows.




kiwisub12 -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 6:50:03 AM)

We met at Barnes and Noble - my suggestion - he asked where i would be comfortable meeting, and since i spent a lot of time there, why not? I was supposed to be sitting in the cafe , waiting, but i got so nervous, i went to my favourite section - sci fi -  and browsed. Not that i remember what i looked at. It was just the presence of books that i found comforting.

I got a call on my cell demanding to know where i was!!!!!  He had got there and i wasn't where i said i would be!  So , like a naughty child i had to rush over to the cafe, and apologise right off the get go.   i was wearing teal cords, and a teal and black stripped shirt and (shock horror) eye makeup!  And i never wear makeup!  I really was trying to make a good impression.

Apparently it worked, because he asked me if i wanted to go to his house that evening - which i respectfully declined - but agreed to met at his house the next evening.  When i walked into his house, i saw a wall of bookcases, full of books(which made me feel better- less nervous) - and after that everything went fuzzy. [:)]
I really wish i could remember more about that evening, but i was so nervous, then so exaulted that i don't think i shall ever know fully what went on. I just know it was everything i could have wanted, and more - because it was real, and it was me - not a character in a book.

I do recall him telling me off because i met at his house without a safecall or any sort of safety net - but i was way too new to the idea of bdsm to even know about safety stuff  -  and, honestly, if i was dating someone in the vanilla world - this was how i would do it.

I fell in love with the bdsm stuff, then the man himself!  Now, i can't imagine life without him. It would be colourless, joyless, and just not good. [:)]




SirDominic -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 7:33:11 AM)

It can take awhile to find the right person, and I am quite picky. It was a year between when I let my last sub go and I started chatting with my current slave.

When we first met in person, we had already been texting, then talking on the phone for several months. Normally, this is not something I do, but this was a long distance issue. We agreed to meet at a hotel between our homes. I purposefully did not tell her what to wear, something I always do, as how a potential sub chooses to dress for a first meet tells me volumes.

Because of our long correspondence, we both had a pretty good idea we wanted this to go somewhere, although I did caution her that no matter how much time you spend on the phone or online, it is that first meet that is the deciding factor. I had rented the room for a long weekend. When she arrived we went and had lunch and got to talk person to person for the first time. The magic was obviously there and we proceeded to have the most delicious weekend.

It was actually pretty hilarious, because we rarely left the room, and were obviously the cause of much gossip amongst the hotel staff. EVERY time I passed a hotel employee they asked me if I was having a wonderful stay. Every time! lol. I always answered with a completely straight face that yes I surely was.




daddysliloneds -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 9:07:12 AM)

which first meet?

one i met at starbucks while wearing beach baggies and a tanktop; one i met at my front door while wearing a skirt and halter top; one i met at a hotel room while wearing a skirt and tank top...

one i spoke to for five hours and decided we would meet again; one i took in my house for six hours while i was being a homework supervisor, ballet costume maker and snack provider; one i didn't even talk to because we immediately started fucking.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 10:07:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz
I thought it would be interesting to find out what happened on that very first meet?

What did you wear? Were you instructed/ or did you instruct that person to wear certain clothes?

Did you make a decision on the first meet that you both wanted to take this somewhere?

How many people did you meet before finding the right one?

Did you play on your first night?

Depended on the person, circumstance, desire for meeting and so forth.  Sometimes it was a casual chat at a munch, sometimes I was fully naked, he came over, beat me up, had sex, and THEN had dinner together.

I tend to note that choosing to submit through clothes and their preferences is no different than choosing to submit by buying a gift- it's still service as required by the person you are meeting.

I always caution simply because many people turn their relationships into a series of kinky vacation weekends together.  They aren't dealing with real life stresses as a close couple, they simply turn off their lives for a few days, meet in hotels, get all hot and bothered and have great fun, and then return to their lives separately.  That's a very different dynamic than an ongoing closeness.




charly303 -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 11:34:02 AM)

The one and only time I've met people through using a site on the net was a couple. We met during the day and went for lunch to just get to know each other and see if we could get on. Then went for a beer and that was it. We then met up later on in the week and had our first session. I was dressed in my normal clothes. For my first session I was made to arrive at their house wearing latex under my clothes with cuffs and a plug. Unfortunately it only lasted a few months but was lots of fun!




teensub -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 12:11:51 PM)

Me and my master decided to take things slowly, so on our first meet, i was wearing what i wanted, we went to a exhibition (granted it was a kinky themed one).
It was nice to not have the pressure of having to do anything else, we just chatted and it felt like we had known each other for years.

A few days later we met up again, and things got a little bit more heated, but we didn't spend a night together until a couple of weeks later. Which felt right




colouredin -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 12:14:26 PM)

My current partner and I met at my local, in wore a dress but then I always do, we played on the first meet, and i  moved in virtually a week later.




babygirlkitten -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 4:13:30 PM)

The only time I've met someone from this site, we met at a restaurant of her choice. I wore jeans, stilleto boots, a silk camisole and a black short sleeved blazer. She stood as I arrived, asked my permission before ordering for us, and served me each course. We had a very nice chat, but there was no spark, so she paid the bill and hailed me a cab. We spoke once or twice since then, but that was that.




oceanwynds -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 5:09:02 PM)

Yes, i do remember the first time we met. We knew each other from an astrology and psychic chat room. He only lived about 45 minutes from me, and one day he decided to come down and visited me. I remember exactly how he was dressed, but I don't recall what I was wearing. That was the first time I heard words such as BDSM and D/s. We talked about the lifestyle a little and about astrology and witchcraft. He figured he would meet me and that would be it, and same here for me.  That was two and a half years ago. Awe a nice memory, thank you for asking.

oceanwynds




mc1234 -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 5:37:33 PM)

I had a first meet today.  It went very, very well.  No instructions on what to wear - it was very casual.  I only had about an hour free, but we wanted to have a face-to-face because our chats were going so nicely.  I've met a few men since breaking off a relationship earlier this year - none of which worked for various reasons - chemistry, whatever.  But today ... everything went great, and we're moving forward.  Lots of talking, no play, a few kisses to determine chemistry (and boy, was there ever).  A very good first meet! 




celticlord2112 -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 5:40:57 PM)

quote:

Did you make a decision on the first meet that you both wanted to take this somewhere?

When I first met my slave in person, I made the decision that I wanted her to be mine.

I can only conclude from the second and subsequent meets that she was not altogether averse to the idea![;)]




servantheart -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 5:50:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: allthatjaz

After reading the post 'LUCK' I thought it would be interesting to find out what happened on that very first meet?

What did you wear? Were you instructed/ or did you instruct that person to wear certain clothes?

Did you make a decision on the first meet that you both wanted to take this somewhere?

How many people did you meet before finding the right one?

Did you play on your first night?



I wore blue scrubs, a long-sleeved white t-shirt underneath since it was chilly that day and white sneakers. 
 
I was not specifically instructed to do anything.
 
In person, two. 
 
We met in the daytime at a restaurant.  The only thing that occured was His framing my face in His hands to bring my eyes up to meet His, followed by a long stare deep into each others' eyes immediately after we said hello; He caressed my face while we were waiting for the food to arrive; a very deep and passionate goodbye kiss.
 




moonvine -> RE: The first meet? (11/9/2008 9:32:26 PM)

The last guy I met from here I wore a pair of black pants and a red lace top.  We met for lunch and it was for the most part a vanilla meeting. 

However he did walk me back to my car, pull my hair back, give me a kiss, and spin me around and give me a whack and said "That's a tease."  I didn't object.[;)]

Then I managed to make myself sick by working in the rain...and we have not talked much since, but we did do the filling out of the checklist likes and dislikes and limits thing...which I have never cared for before, but I am going to see where, if anywhere, this goes...

I have never played on a first meet, although I have been sorely tempted to....




Wickad -> RE: The first meet? (11/10/2008 1:23:12 AM)

(fast reply)

I've met a number of people.  I don't usually consider them a 'first meet' as I host a munch and am always willing to meet new folks one on one before hand.  Some people need a bit of hand holding to feel comfortable coming out to a quasi-public event and I'm willing to go that extra mile.

Those that I've met with the hopes of it evolving into something aside from a lifestyle association I still handle in a pretty casual way.  I'm open to meeting wherever they are comfortable with and I have no expectations other than them showing up.  I don't instruct folks on what to wear and we certainly don't play or have sex on first meeting.  Maybe this is the reason I'm having  no luck with purported male submissives - lol - not really sure.

In any case, I want to know the person before there is any kind of D/s or play scenario and this is the way I chose to go about doing that.  I tend to meet folks as soon as possible because I want to know if there is a connection before I invest a lot of time in discussing limits and such.  That being said, before meeting I do ascertain if the person in question 'fits' my needs or is just a meet for community reasons.

Good luck to those still looking and congrats to those who have found a partner (play or other).

Wickad




ExSteelAgain -> RE: The first meet? (11/10/2008 2:07:02 AM)

I know someone pretty well online before I meet and then it is no different than any other guy/girl thing. It can actually be fun and not that stressful for either of you if you are connected well from the internet/phone. Relax.




Akalashi -> RE: The first meet? (11/10/2008 6:22:50 AM)

For our first meet, I just wore jeans and a t-shirt, since that's normally what I wear, and I didn't have him wear anything in particular either. I wanted to see what he dressed like and I wanted him to be comfortable. When there are so many other things to be thinking and worrying about on your first meet, clothes shouldn't factor into it. 

I'd already decided that I wanted things to go somewhere before I met him in person, but it seemed ridiculous to know that and proceed without meeting him in person first. After meeting him, I was just reassured that I'd been correct in what I knew of him already. I think it took our first meeting for him to feel the same way, but after that we were on the same page.

I only had one pet before this one, but that one was a great learning experience. I was able to identify what I was really looking for in a relationship and so was able to put that information out correctly for someone else.

There was absolutely no play on our first night. We had coffee and talked for eight hours straight. He held open the doors for me and listened to my instructions, but there was no physical play. We did play the next time we got together though, a week later.




WinsomeDefiance -> RE: The first meet? (11/10/2008 12:06:59 PM)

I have been out of comission (for lack of  better word) for years now, but I recently ran into an old Dominant acquaintance of mine, that I knew from my Munch days.  I'm meeting him for coffe and I'm both excited and nervous.  This will be my 'first meet' in many years.  No idea what I'm wearing.  No instructions either way, and no clue what to expect.  Guess I should have waited to post this until AFTER the meet.   





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