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Feelings of intensity - 11/12/2008 10:07:52 PM   
reddivinity


Posts: 17
Joined: 11/19/2006
Status: offline 		What is the protocal for falling in love with a Dom? Which I have never done. I feel, experience,  And crave more everytime. To be clear it is more intense and personal.
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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/12/2008 10:34:02 PM   
theobserver


Posts: 456
Joined: 8/18/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: reddivinity

What is the protocal for falling in love with a Dom? Which I have never done. I feel, experience,  And crave more everytime. To be clear it is more intense and personal.


There is a protocal for falling in love? I would think that it would be the same as falling in love with anyone else, it's there or it isn't. The dynamic of D/S in a relationship, can be viewed as intensifying emotions already there, but I don't think it's much different at it's base.

I dunno, the word protocol seems to throw the entire question off. I'm sure someone will give you the answer you're looking for. It's just not very clear to me what you are asking.

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 12:18:48 AM   
monywildcat


Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		I don't think that there is a "protocol" for falling in love with your Dom.  Either you do, or you don't.  What your Dom does with these feelings, who knows until you talk it over with him.  The OP has left to be desired in the way of details on the particular situation.  I know that for me, the more time I spend playing with someone, the more I start to feel intense emotions of affection and attachment.  Whether that was the original intent is irrelevant.  I am just hard-wired that way.  Thank goodness I have an outlet for these emotions now. 



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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 12:40:27 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: reddivinity

What is the protocal for falling in love with a Dom? Which I have never done. I feel, experience,  And crave more everytime. To be clear it is more intense and personal.


You'll probably have to ask the one in question. I'm not sure that there could be a protocal *for* falling in love but there could be one for how you express it.

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 12:40:41 AM   
TabrisMaceth


Posts: 190
Joined: 9/23/2008
From: The Ghost Matrix
Status: offline 		There's no protocol for love! Love is love! It is free, uncontrollable! Embrace it to your bosom and live!
Or, y'know, whatever.

-Tabris

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 1:51:41 AM   
masterforRT


Posts: 176
Joined: 5/16/2008
Status: offline 		HUH???

What's the protocol for falling in love with a person? I don't think there is one, as no two people are the same.

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 4:15:58 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Protocol for falling in love?

oh dear.... 


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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 5:29:16 AM   
greeneyedreamer


Posts: 442
Joined: 6/20/2007
Status: offline 		Being newer to the BDSM community, I know what you mean. It's ok. You wanted to know if it was accepted to fall in love. Well, IMO it's really up to you and your Dominant person. Ask them. That's the correct "protocol." One may want it and one may hate it. So if you want to fall in love, do so with their blessings.

Dreamer

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 5:38:04 AM   
Cuffkinks


Posts: 1780
Joined: 5/5/2004
Status: offline 		The only "protocol" for falling in love with a Dom that I can think of is the same as anyone else...And that's to tell the person you're falling in love with. Life is too short to not tell someone how you feel about them. Dom, sub, vanilla...whatever.

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 6:11:17 AM   
SadysticJester


Posts: 122
Joined: 6/24/2008
Status: offline 		the only time there would be Protocol,is when you have a Mentor,,,here you must keep your feelings in check and divulge these to them as soon as possible for a aMEntor is just that and has to be objective and keep the personal side/aspect in check at all times....

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 6:05:20 PM   
velvetslave


Posts: 33
Joined: 12/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: reddivinity

What is the protocol for falling in love with a Dom? Which I have never done. I feel, experience,  And crave more every time. To be clear it is more intense and personal.


For myself, in my relationship, there was no "protocol" so to speak.  He knew, by my actions, that i had fallen in love with Him long before i ever uttered those words.  Our relationship strictly D/s based, built on a very strong friendship.  Once i "revealed" my feelings we talked a great deal about them.  i had to decide if i could continue the relationship knowing that He could not return my feelings.  He had to decide if He could accept my feelings for Him at face value and believe that i had no ulterior motives behind them.  We both had to agree on it or there was no way it was going to work.   It is different for each person and each relationship.

Just my thoughts,
velvetslave


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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 6:44:07 PM   
DavanKael


Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline 		Love=emotion
Protocol=behavior
The two are different. 
Now, you might grow to love someone and because of that come to or agree to utilize certain protocols, or you may grow to love someone you have protocols in place with or something else entirely may happen. 
Imo, emotions are automatic.  They don't dictate any particular action. 
Thoughts are things we can learn to control and should at least monitor with regularity. 
Behaviors are things we absolutely can control and should control, unless we are giving ourselves over into the care of another with a level of trust that they can rightly control our behaviors. 
  Davan


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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/13/2008 8:03:26 PM   
MarcEsadrian


Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: reddivinity

What is the protocol for falling in love with a Dom?


I think the question is better phrased, how does one love and become loved by a dominant male?

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RE: Feelings of intensity - 11/14/2008 4:59:33 AM   
greeneyedreamer


Posts: 442
Joined: 6/20/2007
Status: offline 		Perfect Marc!!!

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Dreamer, owned and ecstatically happy

I am still learning... Michelangelo, age 87

Maybe some women weren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they are suppose to run wild until they find someone just as wild to run with. Sex and the City

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