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Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/20/2005 2:25:27 PM

GQponyboy

Posts: 25
Joined: 12/4/2005
From: CT
Status: offline

Pardon my ignourance however, I know sooner or later I am going to find a compatible Mistress and when I do I will want to please her in every way and also pay her material tribute. That being said is there a point and time when tribute is expected? If you can offer any other advice I would very much appreciate it...

Post #: 1

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/20/2005 2:43:54 PM

FTopinMichigan

Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GQponyboy

Pardon my ignourance however, I know sooner or later I am going to find a compatible Mistress and when I do I will want to please her in every way and also pay her material tribute. That being said is there a point and time when tribute is expected? If you can offer any other advice I would very much appreciate it...

The day a man offers to "pay" me "material tribute" is the day I kick him to the curb. While others may differ on their opinion of this, I find this type of "offer" to be quite the insult. I'm not a professional lady, and I equate "tribute" with Pros.

K

(in reply to GQponyboy)

Post #: 2

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/20/2005 6:08:57 PM

MissHarlet

Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline

Material Tribute to me is for Pros ...... and I also would be offended if it were offered to me.

Like any lady I alway appreciate flowers or something like that shows you appreciate me and took the time to find something that you think I will like.

(in reply to FTopinMichigan)

Post #: 3

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/20/2005 6:53:47 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

I think that depends on the woman.

I don't expect or ask for "tribute" -- in fact, I think I'd be insulted if asked this question in non-online life or offered something called 'tribute'.

Now if someone likes me a lot and finds out it is my birthday or a holiday or just sees something he knows I like and we are in a training or owner-slave relationship, a gift is lovely.

Something about the word "tribute" turns my stomach though, annoys me a great deal.

Like I said, that depends on the woman.

GQponyboy, I'd strongly recommend just waiting until you are in a relationship and then you can learn this first hand. Walking in with a prepared idea of what to give someone or when to do it is, in my opinion, almost like asking for trouble. Get to know the individual and you'll know the answers to questions like yours on this topic.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to GQponyboy)

Post #: 4

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/20/2005 10:03:49 PM

keptcaged

Posts: 44
Joined: 4/23/2005
Status: offline

With all due respect to the Ladies.....
i think GQ was refering to a proDom. If not, absolutely, smack him upside the head!
If he was refering to a pro....well lemme tell ya......

Went to a Pro, whom luckily i trust totally. One time i didn't produce "tribute" as soon as i was naked, kneeling before her. She waited 'til i was chained in a taught spread eagle and gagged and very calmly got out surgical gloves, alcohol, swabs and ...........urethral sounds, gulp!

oh yeah, i pleaded for forgiveness into that gag for an hour as one was removed and replaced with one of a larger diameter. After graduaating about four sizes she stopped with one that vibrated inside me, complimenting the vibrating butt plug. Talk about "forced subspace". i was FREAKED for about two weeks. Then i said, hmmmmm, that was a rush.
So i'd say GQ's question scould be a mighty big one!

_____________________________

"Is there anything else i can get you m'am?"

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 5

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/20/2005 10:31:09 PM

PrincessinLatex

Posts: 191
Joined: 7/4/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GQponyboy

Pardon my ignourance however, I know sooner or later I am going to find a compatible Mistress and when I do I will want to please her in every way and also pay her material tribute. That being said is there a point and time when tribute is expected? If you can offer any other advice I would very much appreciate it...

Just like with any other relationship "advice". . .you have to take it all with a grain of salt. The bottom line is: it all depends on the two involved and the dynamic/relationship you have. There is no "one advice fits all" type deal here. As you have read, a lot of people equate the transfer of money from the sub to domina as a basis for a "pro" relationship. In my relationships with mine (and most of my domina friends) it flows pretty freely at will. . .and the subs aren't clients. A pro domina actively seeks clients and generally sessions for a specific period of time under specific guidelines/circumstance. My "girls" are in my life and I don't put a time limit on our interactions. Yet, if I tell them to shell out the chedda/skrilla/duckets/buck/dollars/capital. . .it is the same as an order to go clean the toilet.

I know this dynamic doesn't work for all. . .it seems to be unpalatable to a lot of people. I don't care. . . this is the way I choose to do it. As a matter of fact, I have the credit cards of several. I'm sure they sleep better at night knowing that they do their part to ensure that they meet my needs.

As an aside, I'm tell you the some of the "purist lifestyle" women I have seem that have such a disdain for "tribute" won't bat an eyelash as they as their subs to pay their mortgage. car note, pamper and similac bils ad infinitum. If that is the way that they roll. . .cool. Everyone does it how they feel comfortable with.

THe most important thing is to find your comfort level when it comes to fiscal matters and find someone that can rol with that.

P

(in reply to GQponyboy)

Post #: 6

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/20/2005 11:58:32 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Pardon my ignourance however, I know sooner or later I am going to find a compatible Mistress and when I do I will want to please her in every way and also pay her material tribute. That being said is there a point and time when tribute is expected?

A tribute, is in my view, a gift. I don't give gifts to strangers or people who don't care for me, and hope you don't either. If you decide to give something to someone, let it be something you CAN afford to give/can live without, and only give a gift because you want to and it feels good to do something for someone else. Don't ever give, than come bitch about it, because that would be your own poor choice. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to GQponyboy)

Post #: 7

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/21/2005 6:00:31 AM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GQponyboy

Pardon my ignourance however, I know sooner or later I am going to find a compatible Mistress and when I do I will want to please her in every way and also pay her material tribute. That being said is there a point and time when tribute is expected? If you can offer any other advice I would very much appreciate it...

The following is only my point of view & should not be read into as anything more...

If anyone offers me money I am HIGHLY INSULTED.

I will block someone at the mere hint of this. I am not some type of material acquisition that can be bought. I am not a service that must be paid for after services are rendered.

In fact, I won't accept any type of lavish gift. Traditional tokens are just fine. If someone wishes to buy my flowers, candy or even a little stuffed animal & offer it to me on a 'date', that is perfectly acceptable. Keep in mind that that most of the dommes out there are just normal women that most likely expect the same type of expressions that vanilla women do when it comes to these types of things.

If you are meeting female dominants on here that speak about tributes... I would question their motives.

_____________________________

MstrssPassion

(in reply to GQponyboy)

Post #: 8

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/21/2005 6:18:46 AM

michaelGA

Posts: 1194
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

quote:

ORIGINAL: GQponyboy

Pardon my ignourance however, I know sooner or later I am going to find a compatible Mistress and when I do I will want to please her in every way and also pay her material tribute. That being said is there a point and time when tribute is expected? If you can offer any other advice I would very much appreciate it...

i have a question about this statement, Ma'am. what of those that clearly state on their profile that they are Pro-Dommes and seek financial dominance or finacial trubutes?

The following is only my point of view & should not be read into as anything more...

If anyone offers me money I am HIGHLY INSULTED.

I will block someone at the mere hint of this. I am not some type of material acquisition that can be bought. I am not a service that must be paid for after services are rendered.

In fact, I won't accept any type of lavish gift. Traditional tokens are just fine. If someone wishes to buy my flowers, candy or even a little stuffed animal & offer it to me on a 'date', that is perfectly acceptable. Keep in mind that that most of the dommes out there are just normal women that most likely expect the same type of expressions that vanilla women do when it comes to these types of things.

If you are meeting female dominants on here that speak about tributes... I would question their motives.

(in reply to MstrssPassion)

Post #: 9

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/21/2005 8:52:02 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

When I am working professionally, I expect tribute for my services. That might be money, or some item the person can get for me. Once that is agreed on, I never ask for it, or mention it. I think I am rare as far as that goes, but no one has ever cheated me.....

If I am playing with someone, I am there to enjoy myself. I have some playmates who bring me gifts, and I graciously accept---presents are nice. I would never dream of ASKING for anything from them. All I want from the person I am with is their appreciation of our time together, and sincere reactions and communication.

If I am dating someone, I expect to not pay for things when we are out. He gets to pick up the tab for club entry fees, dinner, etc. Small gestures of generosity are good---like buying me a coffee if we are out shopping. Neglecting those gestures can be meaningful, too---I did not take a maid into our service because he let me buy my own berry smoothie at the Costco after a shopping trip!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 10

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/21/2005 1:39:20 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

I'm tell you the some of the "purist lifestyle" women I have seem that have such a disdain for "tribute" won't bat an eyelash as they as their subs to pay their mortgage. car note, pamper and similac bils ad infinitum. If that is the way that they roll. . .cool. Everyone does it how they feel comfortable with.

I know this is true. It's amazing how anything else is listed under "your kink is not my kink, but..." except when money is mentioned.
I don't and wouldn't ever ask for a tribute/gift, but can say that in my experience, a man's power is very much associated with his money. I don't get along well at all with men who are cheap (notice I didn't equate poor=cheap), because generosity shows up in many different ways and in many different areas of life, and a person who didn't demonstrate a generous spirit over time would prove to be someone I cannot respect or love. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to PrincessinLatex)

Post #: 11

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/21/2005 2:20:14 PM

UtopianRanger

Posts: 3251
Status: offline

quote:

I don't get along well at all with men who are cheap (notice I didn't equate poor=cheap), because generosity shows up in many different ways and in many different areas of life, and a person who didn't demonstrate a generous spirit over time would prove to be someone I cannot respect or love.

Well said M. That rings true in so many ways. It's my feeling that a lack of a generous spirit will cause one to be empty and unfullfilled for a time to come.

- The Ranger

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 12

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/21/2005 4:22:43 PM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline

quote:

michaelGA:
i have a question about this statement, Ma'am. what of those that clearly state on their profile that they are Pro-Dommes and seek financial dominance or finacial trubutes?

I'm not sure what you were questioning but I will take a stab at it...

As far as pros seeking financial dominance or tributes...you are most likely going to pay for a service & that's about it. Maybe it would be in person from time to time or maybe like I have heard way too many times... She asks you to send a small tribute in order to prove your sincerity & poof, nothing more. In some cases, maybe a few email exchanges.

I wouldn't plan on selecting collaring ceremony colors together or being in an exclusive relationship.

& before I am attacked... I am not saying that pros do not collar subs or that they do not seek out LTR's... some do. I am talking about the number of profiles on here (& elsewhere) that the users specifically set up in order to make money & nothing more far out number the lifestyle pros that may be seeking personal submissives rather than a paying client.

That is what I meant by questioning their motives.

_____________________________

MstrssPassion

(in reply to michaelGA)

Post #: 13

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/22/2005 12:44:29 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Well said M. That rings true in so many ways. It's my feeling that a lack of a generous spirit will cause one to be empty and unfullfilled for a time to come.
- The Ranger

Whether in vanilla or lifestyle relationship, if a person is not kind, considerate and generous (like I am), he isn't the right partner for me. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to UtopianRanger)

Post #: 14

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/22/2005 12:51:36 PM

veronicaofML

Posts: 1317
Joined: 11/19/2005
From: from iowa..now in wisconsin
Status: offline

& before I am attacked... I am not saying that pros do not collar subs or that they do not seek out LTR's... some do. I am talking about the number of profiles on here (& elsewhere) that the users specifically set up in order to make money & nothing more far out number the lifestyle pros that may be seeking personal submissives rather than a paying client.

That is what I meant by questioning their motives.
============

and that's a fact, jack!

_____________________________

drugs sex and rock n roll,...drugs are good and so is the rock n roll, sex is over rated"
=============
"go straight to hell, do not pass go and do not collect $200"

(in reply to GQponyboy)

Post #: 15

RE: Tribute - When is it appropriate - 12/23/2005 10:16:11 AM

Oumae

Posts: 911
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

Well said M. That rings true in so many ways. It's my feeling that a lack of a generous spirit will cause one to be empty and unfullfilled for a time to come.
- The Ranger
Whether in vanilla or lifestyle relationship, if a person is not kind, considerate and generous (like I am), he isn't the right partner for me. M

I so agree M

and being generous is not all about money. Its about being thoughtful for me.

Oumae

_____________________________

Is cuma le fear na mbrog ca leagann se a chos.
( The man with the boots does not mind where he places his foot)

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 16

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