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A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/16/2008 2:42:42 PM   
sasshay


Posts: 38
Joined: 3/5/2006
Status: offline 		I've always fantasized about being a Mommy Domme to a female submissive. That fantasy hasn't worked out. I now have a male wanting to be my baby boy. How do I go about being a Mommy Domme to a male? My 2nd marriage was of this kind of relationship w/o us knowing it was of the kinky kind. But I didn't like the responsibilities he laid on me in the marriage. How can this be different?
Any help or guidance would be appreciated.

Regards,
shay

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It's not the size of the dog in the fight
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
~Mark Twain~
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/16/2008 3:00:30 PM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		The point of te Domme part is you get to set out the parameters to prevent it going to a place that you dont like, you get to work out how what you both want can fit together and impliment it in a way that you want it to be

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(in reply to sasshay)
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/16/2008 4:13:23 PM   
VeryCurious07


Posts: 45
Joined: 12/28/2007
Status: offline 		Also, I would caution you against being involved with a so called "adult baby" who wants you to be the primary caregiver 24/7, which would translate into YOU doing all the work, cleaning up all the mess, maintaining the house, and him being basically stagnant. My suggestion is that part of the arrangement you make with him is that you make certain that he realizes YOU are in charge. This means that you decide how the division of chores is to occur if you live together. You decide what his responsibilities are in the relationship. I am not sure if you are entering a Mommy-Baby relationship or if the person you are involved with wants a generic Mommy and be treated like an older child or adolescent.

If it is the former then explain to him that while he may be a "baby" his body and brain are adult, and you will expect him to do his share of the work, earn a living (if you allow him to, that is) and perform any other functions you would expect from a submissive man in your life.

(in reply to colouredin)
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/16/2008 6:48:59 PM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		Is there such a thing as a female AB?  I've never heard of one.  I've sure never heard of a female baby with a Daddy who changes diapers. 

I don't mean to be offensive to anyone... but I really don't 'get' this particular kink.  I would actually like for someone to explain this one to me. 


_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/16/2008 7:56:13 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I've had a female AB, and a male one.
If you do not like having the amount of pressure put on you to be a caregiver, the kink is not for you. It is much like having a real baby, for periods of time at least, and leading towards 24/7 often. ABs are demanding emotionally and physically. If you want age play, thats very different than wanting a true AB. Age play comes and goes with the scene. an adult baby wants to be and tries to be a baby all the time.

DV

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I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

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VampiresLair

(in reply to MsStarlett)
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/16/2008 8:43:17 PM   
OneMoreWaste


Posts: 910
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline 		What kind of things did you fantasize about doing with a female submissive? Think about how you can adapt them to the partner you've found. 

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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/16/2008 8:45:22 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I have known AB's of all genders.  It is definitely NOT the kink for me---having been a caregiver in real life, I just can't translate it to kink/enjoyment. 

It's important to set the parameters of what you will do, and what your partner is going to do to hold up the practical work outside the scenes.  Start slowly, and do the things that YOU enjoy most.  This should be an enhancement to your life, not a chore. 


< Message edited by LadyHibiscus -- 11/16/2008 8:46:58 PM >

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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 4:53:48 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sasshay

I've always fantasized about being a Mommy Domme to a female submissive. That fantasy hasn't worked out. I now have a male wanting to be my baby boy. How do I go about being a Mommy Domme to a male? My 2nd marriage was of this kind of relationship w/o us knowing it was of the kinky kind. But I didn't like the responsibilities he laid on me in the marriage. How can this be different?
Any help or guidance would be appreciated.

Regards,
shay

I don't see the difference between boy and girl??
The fantasy is exactly the same right?
I wouldn't dream of changing diapers again,
and never will especially from a grown up !!!!


I wish you enough.

GoddezzT`


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(in reply to sasshay)
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 5:31:05 AM   
twistedreality


Posts: 64
Joined: 5/22/2008
Status: offline 		I keep seeing the same thing...pressure to be a caregiver. As Colouredin tried to say, you are the domme and therfore you decide the rules (for the most part). Yes being a mommy to an adult baby is exactly that. But, I assure you based on my experience, there can be a more dominant side to this type of relationship, which most people greatly overlook.

The psychological aspects of diaper humiliation, forced diapering, diaper chastity, forced infantilism, etc, are extreme. Perhpaps what is needed is someone who doesnt necessarily want to be an adult baby. An imaginative and creative domme, could find many ways to twist this to her benefit. The key is, do you want to be more of a a mommy or a domme?

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 5:41:09 AM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		Not my kink for sure!

I got thrust into the 'caregiver' role by the time I was 14.  I had a very old, great uncle who came to live with us for a while.  He had zero control over his bladder.  My job, every morning before I went to school was to strip his wet sheets & blankets, wash them and hang them out on the line to dry.  Then remake his bed with clean bedding.  After school, I had to cook dinner for the entire family and make sure Lon ate his.

Then I always had to baby sit for my niece when I was 16.  Had my own baby on the day after my 20th birthday.  Had to nurse two grandmothers and my father when they became bed ridden.  Why in the heck would I want to do all that for someone perfectly capable of taking care of themselves?


_____________________________

It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of Java that thoughts acquire speed,
the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning,
It is by caffeine alone I set my mind in motion.

(in reply to twistedreality)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 6:29:06 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett

Not my kink for sure!

I got thrust into the 'caregiver' role by the time I was 14.  I had a very old, great uncle who came to live with us for a while.  He had zero control over his bladder.  My job, every morning before I went to school was to strip his wet sheets & blankets, wash them and hang them out on the line to dry.  Then remake his bed with clean bedding.  After school, I had to cook dinner for the entire family and make sure Lon ate his.

Then I always had to baby sit for my niece when I was 16.  Had my own baby on the day after my 20th birthday.  Had to nurse two grandmothers and my father when they became bed ridden.  Why in the heck would I want to do all that for someone perfectly capable of taking care of themselves?



Right with you, Ms S!  I will leap right on back to Planet Caregiver if I have to, but for "fun"?  Nope!  Now, I WILL hang out for tea parties, adventure expeditions to mysterious corners of the basement, forts under the dining room table, Hot Wheels...  you get the idea.

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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 6:36:21 AM   
Sylverdawn


Posts: 1123
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I dont believe that its that unusual to find baby's in both genders. Go to a leather convention and you are sure to find at least one baby boy.. and one baby girl ( ususally lesbian )..I dont understand wanting to care for either non verbal, diapered clinging fetishist.. but hey each to their own...

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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 7:09:44 AM   
allthatjaz


Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline 		Its interesting but my partner and me have a submissive who calls me mummy and him daddy but there is absolutely no age play involved in anything we do.
She is a free spirit and can play with other people but she looks on us more as mentors. We will look out for her, keep her safe and give her advise when she needs it but when we do play with her it is certainly not age play in any given form.

I also have a very dear friend on the scene that I call my daddy. He is just a nice kind cuddly man that would guard me through any difficult situation. I just use the name daddy as an endearment, the same as our sub does with us.

(in reply to Sylverdawn)
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 7:42:29 AM   
sasshay


Posts: 38
Joined: 3/5/2006
Status: offline 		My fantasy was to dress a girl in clothes I'd think would suit her. Train her how to behave in public. Encourage her to persue an education and a career. If she decides to stay with me, then we'd have a full relationship. I'm bi-curious by the way. I've been approached several times by interested 20'ish fems but didn't realize it until too late....each one, in my mind, I'd re-dress and put on different makeup on this/these girl(s). I never thought I'd be attractive to fems. I know a come-com from a male a mile away.

My babyboy wannabe is willing to switch with me as I desire to be submissive at times. I would have him move to my area and into his own dwelling that I would have access to. He said he'd relocate and find a job here before we'd start our relationship. This would be play only.

I appreciate all of your ideas and encouragements!
With regards,
shay

_____________________________

It's not the size of the dog in the fight
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
~Mark Twain~

(in reply to allthatjaz)
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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 11/17/2008 5:14:06 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Mother figure... okay... caregiver and diapers... sorry... been there and done that and they were cuter... not going to happen!

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RE: A question about being a MommyDomme - 12/2/2008 4:09:11 PM   
bigbABygentleman


Posts: 34
Joined: 7/20/2008
Status: offline 		I think communication is the way to start initially. Talk to him and find out what his expectations are of you. Then find out and explain to him, what your expectations are of him. Then proceed accordingly. If you can't come to some common ground, it's probably a moot point anyway!

Learn if he's an AB or DL. Does he mind how you dress him as a male or female bABy or diaper lover ma'am. You may have a sissy bABy or diaper lover on your hands and have the best of both of your worlds. Besides, most bABies, larger or smaller don't really care what they wear. It's apparent in society when you see a little girl or boy, dressed in frilly or masculine rompers etc.

Also, you need to know that if he's an AB, it could be very straining on the relationship, since most bABies don't do much but lay around in their cribs and wet and mess their diapers. If he on the otherhand is an  AB that's being punished by a Dominant woman and regressed, then you have an Adult bABy and you can work them around the house and make them earn their keep. You can also make them clean up anything that doesn't agree with your standards for the relationship. . . i.e. messy diapers ma'am.

(in reply to Lockit)
Profile   Post #: 16
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