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ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

In most contexts where the subject of the emotional maturity of young men, Lady C, people are generally quite scathing.  Young men are considered to have little or none of it, frankly.  And they're not greatly known for being articulate, either.

Here, we have a young man, and one who may have the extra difficulty of trying to cope with what might feel like contradictory needs - to be both submissive and assertive (assertive enough to state his limits, for instance).  That's a tall order.  I think with young, inexperienced sub males, its incumbent on dominants to do a lot of careful questioning and discussing.  At least as much as they'd do with a young, inexperienced female sub, in fact.

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

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ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

In most contexts where the subject of the emotional maturity of young men, Lady C, people are generally quite scathing.  Young men are considered to have little or none of it, frankly.  And they're not greatly known for being articulate, either.

Here, we have a young man, and one who may have the extra difficulty of trying to cope with what might feel like contradictory needs - to be both submissive and assertive (assertive enough to state his limits, for instance).  That's a tall order.  I think with young, inexperienced sub males, its incumbent on dominants to do a lot of careful questioning and discussing.  At least as much as they'd do with a young, inexperienced female sub, in fact.

In case his profile is correct, he is 24, that is a grown up in my book, personally I wouldn't play with anybody when I would doubt their maturity or would have reason to doubt they could articulate their limits. But as Lady P said, it seems a bit of a fantasy issue here anyway, I mean knowing each other for 3 weeks, having played with each other 3 times, then the pulls a TV out of her hat.... You know, it is actually a lot easier to find a sub willing to be on the receiving end of a male/male action than one who is the "giver" in BDSM, because simply "taking" it is seen as the submissive bit and most guys don't perceive that as being gay, it's the "My Domme made me do it" effect. Finding a guy willing to be the one who **** is the challenge, the fact that one miraculously appeared should have made me think twice....

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

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First of all, when I read this OP, I'm going to tell you that I thought it was a bunch of bunk. It sounded more like a fantasy of someone who was interested in having sex with a male (I don't care about the clothes) under the old guise of 'my dominant made me' and it was wank material. Don't ever be surprised at how popular this little idea is out there. I happen to think the reason it for it being so is because it's a pathway for them to have same sex adventures, without the guilt associated with such while doing the deed. Yes, often guilt comes later, but they still have that nice cushion to fall on. "Oh, I wouldn't have done it if it wasn't for My Dominant."

Uhhhh yes, during my pro phase, I always laughed when somebody used the phrase "forced bi", how bloody forced is it if you actually request it and pay for it?

I recently joked with Irene Boss about it, she thinks the whole term "forced bi" is actually an insult to gays and that the guys, her exact words were:

"It's one thing if a person is bi or gay and they want a "forced sex scene" but pretending to be straight when you want to suck a dick in front of a Mistress is just plain silly, so we need a new sexual definition for this Fem Dom BDSM anomaly.
If a dick goes in your mouth guys, you are not straight anymore. Sorry. You are a fake gay slave, which is a slave to a man's cock and then the cock is really the Mistress."

I joked that next time I am going to buy bread, I'll call it forced bread, because I request it, pay for it....

I have no issue with people's sexual orientations, whatever floats your boat, but the whole requested "forced" stuff is just plain silly!

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

How somebody is wired is not a problem, but to claim that you are straight when you actually crave partners of the same sex is ridiculous, sailing under a wrong label and in that respect I absolutely agree with Irene

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ORIGINAL: Madame4a

sex is sex.. it can be about friction or it can be more meaningful -- ultimately, sexual acts do not define one's sexuality, particularly if in some way (real or not) you convince yourself you're doing them to please someone...

I'm very strident about this because while I do enjoy sex, D/s, BDSM and all kinds of things with men, I am first and foremost a lesbian.. because my romantic and longterm lover type relationships will always most likely be with women...

sex does NOT define a person...

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

How somebody is wired is not a problem, but to claim that you are straight when you actually crave partners of the same sex is ridiculous, sailing under a wrong label and in that respect I absolutely agree with Irene

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ORIGINAL: BKSir

Having a dick in your mouth or up your backside, or vice versa, does not make one gay or even bi.  However, enjoying it, well... that might be a clue in to things there.  Bisexuals are lucky though.  3 times the chance to get some.  Bi guys have the option of straight females, bi males and females, AND gay males.  Lucky bastages.  Then again, according to Kinsey, a bit over 80% of the world population is bisexual to some degree or another, so, yeah, there ya be.

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ORIGINAL: DavanKael

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ORIGINAL: BKSir

Having a dick in your mouth or up your backside, or vice versa, does not make one gay or even bi.  However, enjoying it, well... that might be a clue in to things there.  Bisexuals are lucky though.  3 times the chance to get some.  Bi guys have the option of straight females, bi males and females, AND gay males.  Lucky bastages.  Then again, according to Kinsey, a bit over 80% of the world population is bisexual to some degree or another, so, yeah, there ya be.

You do realize that your definition is contrary to that of Kinsey, yes? 
Davan

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

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ORIGINAL: Madame4a

sex is sex.. it can be about friction or it can be more meaningful -- ultimately, sexual acts do not define one's sexuality, particularly if in some way (real or not) you convince yourself you're doing them to please someone...

I'm very strident about this because while I do enjoy sex, D/s, BDSM and all kinds of things with men, I am first and foremost a lesbian.. because my romantic and longterm lover type relationships will always most likely be with women...

sex does NOT define a person...

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

How somebody is wired is not a problem, but to claim that you are straight when you actually crave partners of the same sex is ridiculous, sailing under a wrong label and in that respect I absolutely agree with Irene

Well, I can't recall that I said sex defines a person, could you please point me to where I said it?

Heterosexuality is the attraction to persons of the opposite sex; homosexuality, to persons of the same sex; and bisexuality, to both sexes. Sexual orientation can be seen as part of a continuum ranging from same-sex attraction only (at one end of the continuum) to opposite-sex attraction only (at the other end of the continuum).

Of course you can classify your own sexual orientation as whatever you wish for yourself, just like I could claim that I'm a Klingon, if it makes it true would be another thing.

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Maybe it would help if you would try to understand the concept? And you presumed - incorrectly.

Thanks for reminding my why I didn't want to become a teacher, since you seem to be a bit challenged with what I say and what you presume I said, I don't need to spell them out in detail since you seem to be hell bent to "presume" the way it fits you.

Personally I see nothing wrong with accepting definitions that seem to be scientifically accepted, but then again, I also don't have a chip on my shoulder if I am gay or straight, I happily accept myself as bisexual, since I am attracted to men and women, of course common logic would be, that a person would only enjoy sex with the gender(s) they are attracted to.

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ORIGINAL: Madame4a

ok.. thanks for the good laugh...[:D]

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ORIGINAL: BKSir

Having a dick in your mouth or up your backside, or vice versa, does not make one gay or even bi.  However, enjoying it, well... that might be a clue in to things there.  Bisexuals are lucky though.  3 times the chance to get some.  Bi guys have the option of straight females, bi males and females, AND gay males.  Lucky bastages.  Then again, according to Kinsey, a bit over 80% of the world population is bisexual to some degree or another, so, yeah, there ya be.

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ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze
I think the fact that the shemale joined them and they talked for a while is pretty much an indicator that she was feeling him out and gave him a chance to say "Mistress, no offense but I do prefer women" or "Oh now, if it would be a real woman I would be excited..."

I would judge her much more harshly if she would just have sprung the other participant on him without giving him a chance to veto.