Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: How soon to reveal private info?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: How soon to reveal private info? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 11:39:31 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		I don't think you were wrong for not wanting to give out your number after two conversations.  Master and i exchanged e mails for a month then he gave me HIS number.  If i did not want to call him at that time he would have understood, but he really wanted to hear the voice of the girl he had been "talking" to for a month.  I called him and now 3 years later the rest as they say is history.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to littlemissmira)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 11:41:09 AM   
moonvine


Posts: 780
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		Nothing is unreasonable if you don't think it is unreasonable.  I give out my number relatively freely (it is a cell phone) but would be unlikely to after 2 emails.

(in reply to undercover00756)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 11:45:28 AM   
WestBaySlave


Posts: 501
Joined: 9/24/2008
Status: offline 		 Sometimes I give my number out after a few emails if those emails sound really promising, but if someone blocked you for not giving out your number, they're rejecting you for taking a sensible safety precaution, and they're not worth your time.



(in reply to littlemissmira)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 3:43:01 PM   
ThundersCry


Posts: 892
Status: offline 		I do ASAP...
 
800 BEND OVER...

(in reply to undercover00756)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 5:23:31 PM   
MasterTslave


Posts: 200
Joined: 8/24/2005
Status: offline 		wow, online stuff wanting a number after 1 email each?  Not so much!  Too many freaks out there.

(in reply to undercover00756)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 7:22:50 PM   
Usako


Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlemissmira

this girl tends to go on gut feeling... is it really any different to meeting someone briefly in a bar?


At least at a bar you're looking at the guy...
Online, an e-mail can come from anyone. A guy pretending to be a woman. One of those Nigerian scammers. A scammer in general...the list goes on.

(in reply to littlemissmira)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 8:36:44 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: undercover00756

I exchanged 2 emails (one each) and she asked for my phone number and insured discretion. I replied that I hoped we could get comfortable through emails first, and her response was to block me. Was my request unreasonable?


I don't think so...  but more importantly... do you think it was reasonable... if you do... then your obviously better off with out her.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to undercover00756)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 8:56:48 PM   
StrongSpirit


Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
Status: offline 		Until you consent, this is just like any other relationship.   As such, making demands and blocking for failure is not a reasonable activity unless consent has already been established.

I.E.  The dom was wrong.

--------------
Note, in general I have found that the biggest mistake Doms' make is to come on too strong.  From reading the forums, it is fairly clear that there are a certain category of rude people that think being Dom means they get to Dom everyone.  This is part of how I define a "wannabe".

What would you think of a race car driver that insisted on taking a Porsche for a 180 mph test drive on public streets before he bought it?  You would laugh at the arrogant idiot.  Yeah, he might be skilled enough to do it, but he hasn't paid for it yet, has no insurance etc. etc.

The real pity is that it is not just an amateur mistake.  There are quite a few people that have been doing this for a long time that still make it. 

(in reply to littlemissmira)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/24/2008 9:02:17 PM   
elegantalexis


Posts: 237
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I have not given my info to my Master yet, but Mistress gave me her number since she is busy in another state.  I feel comfortable talking to her since we both have a similiar background.  I IM with MAster almost every night until he is able to get my personal sub and myself to his place next week for our LTR to start.

I think the Domme was too fast to pass judgment and block you.  In these days of Internet safety, you are quite right to be cautious.

(in reply to StrongSpirit)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 11/25/2008 7:19:32 AM   
undercover00756


Posts: 19
Joined: 9/5/2008
Status: offline 		I'm feeling alot better after reading all these posts. Her demands and attempts at mind control (one of my own kinks!) made me begin to wonder if i was reasonable. One who can get what she wants without demands....now that's a REAL Domme!

(in reply to elegantalexis)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 12/4/2008 4:26:02 PM   
panthersub


Posts: 80
Joined: 5/20/2008
Status: offline 		i don't see how that is unreasonable. i've had the same happen to me several times because i will not give out person information until we talk for a while and i get to know them. Then once we both decide, or i'm usually the one deciding, on whether to meet or not. Then i will give them my number. But i do not like it when they ask for a picture first time talking online. This to some people make them think i am a fake, and have been called it a few times. Oh well, if she blocked you, then she's probably missing out on something. Just move on and find another to correspond with. Good luck with it.

(in reply to undercover00756)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 12/4/2008 4:53:27 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline 		Fast post

i agree with missmira..i dont think there is any hard and fast rule.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to littlemissmira)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 12/4/2008 5:03:59 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Well for her it obviously was.

for me after a day or two emailing I'd be ok with handing out my phone number.

quote:

ORIGINAL: undercover00756

I exchanged 2 emails (one each) and she asked for my phone number and insured discretion. I replied that I hoped we could get comfortable through emails first, and her response was to block me. Was my request unreasonable?

(in reply to undercover00756)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 12/4/2008 6:02:26 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Two brief emails and she wants your data? Way too early for me.

Some people keep a second cell phone just for meeting/talking to online types. You could do that. A tracphone would be good because if someone pesters you, just hand it back in and get a new one with a different number.

If you're local, just offer to meet in a Starbucks for coffee. Wear a carnation on your collar or something like that for identification. Exchange first names only. Because there's no need to give someone all this identification if you never want to see them again.

Beyond that, if someone demanded that from me, I'm the sort to say "You first". But if she can't wait or won't meet you right away when she claims to live in the same town, maybe you're better off without her.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to littlemissmira)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: How soon to reveal private info? - 12/5/2008 1:27:40 PM   
satisfied


Posts: 19
Joined: 12/2/2008
Status: offline 		I have friends who have had this happen with them as well. A dom/me (yes i used lowercase) who barely knew them asked for extremly personal info or an agressive task right away and when they refused they were blocked. i would like to believe that a true Dom/me would not exhibit this behaviour. There are however many "troll dom/me's out there who are only looking for a good time and truly do not care about anyone's confort or well being but their own. I would say that you have dodged a bullet. Congrats.

_____________________________

satisfied{SW}

If God Intended Us Not To Masturbate,
He Would Have Made Our Arms Shorter!

(in reply to littlemissmira)
Profile   Post #: 35
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: How soon to reveal private info? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078