RE: Length of a session. (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress



Message


marie2 -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 7:02:08 AM)

Usually up to about 3-4 hrs.  And that includes some time relaxing together afterwards.




LadyPact -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 8:57:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett
I just don't understand the public setting with one hour sessions.  I hear the Ladies talking about one hour pubilc play or Pro sessions, and I just don't 'get it'.  Just curiosity about what I have not experianced.


Fair enough.  Which part do you want to know about?  I can't help you with the Pro session part but certainly can about the public play.




mummyman321 -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 9:37:05 AM)

For me I rarerly do session under 8 to 12 hours. And I prefer more the 24 to 36 hours. This includes being keep bound all night while the Domme sleeps. I think its a different kind of play than most seek. But for me and Domme it is a nice weekend of focused fun even if we are both exhausted by the time its done.




LadyHibiscus -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 10:11:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett
I just don't understand the public setting with one hour sessions.  I hear the Ladies talking about one hour pubilc play or Pro sessions, and I just don't 'get it'.  Just curiosity about what I have not experianced.


Fair enough.  Which part do you want to know about?  I can't help you with the Pro session part but certainly can about the public play.



Don't you ever do public parties, Ms S?  There's no timer, it's just a matter of limited equipment and folks who want to use it.  It's grand when there is a slow night! [:)]

When I was a pro, I did not have a timer going.  A session was "about" an hour and a half.  We were done when I felt like we were done.  If we felt like hanging around afterward, we did, and that was certainly not part of the "session".  A local pro dom I know had a price list down to the half hour, and heaven forfend that she went over that!   Guess it depends on how much you like your work, and your clientele. [;)]




MsStarlett -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 10:49:22 AM)

I have never attended a public party.  Aren't I just deprived?  You Ladies have to realize that I've been 'in the closet' most of my life.  I only 'outed' myself about a year ago.  What I thought was hilarious was that when I did, all my friends were like "Well DUH!  Everyone already knew that."  I guess I wasn't as secretive as I thought I was and/or my boys gossiped way to much.

Last Easter Frolicon in Atlanta was my first lifestyle convention where it was pretty much out in the open.  (I kept teasing that "I'm not here.  You didn't see me.  I have no idea how these photos got on my camera.")  My Westie wants to go with me next year and play in the public dungeon.  They had way more equipment than was being used most of the day, but it got rather crowded at night.  I'm assuming that it is polite to be 'quick about it' when others are waiting... but we can take our time when it's quite?  It takes TIME to warm up a pain slut.  You can't just whip out the canes and lay into the boy without getting his endorphines flowing first.  And bondage takes a while to get everything in place and hooked up... and I use chains and clippies, not ropes and knots.  That takes some seriouse time.

So, really, how DOES that work?  If you only have an hour or so... how does one go about getting their sub into proper place (bound) or into subspace (right mind set to enjoy a beating) in less than an hour?  Besides, Westie and I are quite sexual.  Is Intimated contact discouraged in a public place?  I know I saw a MDom working over a fsub with insertables pretty good at Frolicon.  No one else (during the day) was doing anything very intence.  Mostly what I saw was some light flogging, suspention and hot wax demo type work.  None of those people were rushed.  They were taking their time and were more than happy to discuss what they were doing with those of us walking by.  I did not venture back down to the dungeon after it got crowded because my husband was not comfortable in that setting.  So, yes, full on public play is a whole new experiance for me.  I don't quite understand the whole 'get in, get at it, clean up and get out of the way' concept. 




LadyPact -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 11:37:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett
So, really, how DOES that work?  If you only have an hour or so... how does one go about getting their sub into proper place (bound) or into subspace (right mind set to enjoy a beating) in less than an hour?  Besides, Westie and I are quite sexual.  Is Intimated contact discouraged in a public place?  I know I saw a MDom working over a fsub with insertables pretty good at Frolicon.  No one else (during the day) was doing anything very intence.  Mostly what I saw was some light flogging, suspention and hot wax demo type work.  None of those people were rushed.  They were taking their time and were more than happy to discuss what they were doing with those of us walking by.  I did not venture back down to the dungeon after it got crowded because my husband was not comfortable in that setting.  So, yes, full on public play is a whole new experiance for me.  I don't quite understand the whole 'get in, get at it, clean up and get out of the way' concept. 


Let's see what I can do to help.  As you might be aware, I view public play and private play differently.  I do not do any type of public sexual play that involves any exposure of My person.  That's a private thing to Me.  Depending on the venue, I've done things such as used insertables on clip, but not to the point of orgasm.  That's usually frowned on in public settings.

As to what's allowed and what's not, at an event like the one you were at for Frolicon, the dungeon rules are normally available prior to play.  They will usually say if sexual play of any type is allowed and how far you are allowed to go.  There's usually a line drawn at the exchange of bodily fluids, all insertables must be covered by a condom, yadda, yadda.  That stuff that the event holders are trying to avoid a liability if something should go wrong.

Many times at a large gathering, if there's limited equipment and many people want to play, the organizers will request that people keep the time using various things to a limit.  Things like a wax scene might not have worked during the evening hours and done during the day for that specific reason.  If you're going to do a canvas, you can't put that into an hour.  Well, not if you do them like Mine, anyway.  During the day, when most people are going to presentations, there's more time that you can put into it.

So, how do you get your work done in an hour?  You use the advantages at your disposal.  Some bottoms have an elevated sensitivity because it *will* be public.  A great way to get them already partially revved up during the day.  In those kinds of settings, you do little things to start the motor all day long.  Little bits of pain here, something whispered in the ear there.  Long before you even get to the play space, you make sure the boy notices the wicked look in your eye and the evil grin in your smile.  Get his head space going long before the actual play space.  It's the dance before the dance.  Use the anticipation factor.  Exploit  that craving for the upcoming scene.  Build those desires much like you would if you were teasing someone who couldn't have you right now, but will later.  Use those methods to your best advantage.  I think you hear what I'm saying.  [;)]

***  To all submissive males reading this post.  Stop it right now!  None of you are allowed to know the tricks of the trade.  Go read something else right this minute!  Unless, of course...... it appeals to you.




MsStarlett -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 12:21:45 PM)

Cool.  Thanks.  I plan on taking Westie to Frolicon next spring.  He's looking forward to public play.  I've always been a bit of an exhibitionist, so it sounds like great fun for me.  Since I currently do not have a full dungeon set up - although husband is at the storage house RIGHT NOW clearing some space for me - there are lots of things that I do not have that Westie wants to try like the full sized St. Andrew's cross and proper whipping benches.  (He's such a doll!  Always excited about trying new things!) 

I had heard rumors that Frolicon was trying to encourge full sexual contact in the dungeon... but that may have been JUST a wishful thinking rumor.  Since I was only watching and not participating, I did not get all the rules.  (If you were there and know, please chime in!)  We will most likely only be playing during the day when it's less crowded.  That way we will not be rushed and I can take my time with him.  As they say "Slowly.  Slowly!  It's much to nice a job to rush."  I do tend to tease, taunt and toy with my boy constantly.  I like to keep him slightly on edge at all times.  It's fun.  But I still prefer to start him out with a nice OTK and getting his tail in place before moving on to something more intense.  We need a chair and a little quite time to consentrate on each other for that.  Who knows?  He has taken to everything else like a duck to water.  He might like public play even more than I do.




LadyPact -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 1:31:59 PM)

I wasn't at Frolicon.  I was at SELF and DomCon this past year.  What you might want to try is looking at the Frolicon website to see what they consider their dungeon and their dungeon rules.  I'm sure it will be posted.

Don't mean to burst the bubble, but don't put your hopes too high on that full sexual contact thing.  The potential liability could be disastrous. 




Madame4a -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 5:06:28 PM)

I agree with everything LadyPact has said -- I also try to find ways to get around the 'shortened' scene that is necessary in public.  I tend to go late and play later; that often means the dungeon has cleared out.  You do have to watch time to some extent usually, depending on the space because they often wish to close at some point.

Sometimes I work to just find the right corner and start my scene before I get on a piece of equipment -- we are nothing if not creative, right?  Sometimes, all I need is a chair to sit in and every bit of fun can begin as far as I'm concerned.

I also tend to play at spaces where I know people well and they have some idea of how long I'm going to use some equipment and they might give me a break.  I tend, however, to take in the space carefully and think about how many people and there who is going to play --and I'm courteous.  If its a light night, you can usually play longer.

That's my take on enjoying public play and not allowing the idea that you be limited by time to stomp on your good time.


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsStarlett
So, really, how DOES that work?  If you only have an hour or so... how does one go about getting their sub into proper place (bound) or into subspace (right mind set to enjoy a beating) in less than an hour?  Besides, Westie and I are quite sexual.  Is Intimated contact discouraged in a public place?  I know I saw a MDom working over a fsub with insertables pretty good at Frolicon.  No one else (during the day) was doing anything very intence.  Mostly what I saw was some light flogging, suspention and hot wax demo type work.  None of those people were rushed.  They were taking their time and were more than happy to discuss what they were doing with those of us walking by.  I did not venture back down to the dungeon after it got crowded because my husband was not comfortable in that setting.  So, yes, full on public play is a whole new experiance for me.  I don't quite understand the whole 'get in, get at it, clean up and get out of the way' concept. 


Let's see what I can do to help.  As you might be aware, I view public play and private play differently.  I do not do any type of public sexual play that involves any exposure of My person.  That's a private thing to Me.  Depending on the venue, I've done things such as used insertables on clip, but not to the point of orgasm.  That's usually frowned on in public settings.

As to what's allowed and what's not, at an event like the one you were at for Frolicon, the dungeon rules are normally available prior to play.  They will usually say if sexual play of any type is allowed and how far you are allowed to go.  There's usually a line drawn at the exchange of bodily fluids, all insertables must be covered by a condom, yadda, yadda.  That stuff that the event holders are trying to avoid a liability if something should go wrong.

Many times at a large gathering, if there's limited equipment and many people want to play, the organizers will request that people keep the time using various things to a limit.  Things like a wax scene might not have worked during the evening hours and done during the day for that specific reason.  If you're going to do a canvas, you can't put that into an hour.  Well, not if you do them like Mine, anyway.  During the day, when most people are going to presentations, there's more time that you can put into it.

So, how do you get your work done in an hour?  You use the advantages at your disposal.  Some bottoms have an elevated sensitivity because it *will* be public.  A great way to get them already partially revved up during the day.  In those kinds of settings, you do little things to start the motor all day long.  Little bits of pain here, something whispered in the ear there.  Long before you even get to the play space, you make sure the boy notices the wicked look in your eye and the evil grin in your smile.  Get his head space going long before the actual play space.  It's the dance before the dance.  Use the anticipation factor.  Exploit  that craving for the upcoming scene.  Build those desires much like you would if you were teasing someone who couldn't have you right now, but will later.  Use those methods to your best advantage.  I think you hear what I'm saying.  [;)]

***  To all submissive males reading this post.  Stop it right now!  None of you are allowed to know the tricks of the trade.  Go read something else right this minute!  Unless, of course...... it appeals to you.





Coupleofwhats -> RE: Length of a session. (11/30/2008 7:44:29 PM)

It depends on a lot of things: what we're doing, how I'm feeling, what I'm wearing...

Generally, I'd say, one to two hours would about do it, and I freely admit to not having the best attention span.




DelilahDeb -> RE: Length of a session. (12/1/2008 1:20:40 AM)

Depends on when you start counting!
And, realistically, it also depends on who I'm playing with, and the nature of our relationship. In general terms, I tend to spend at least a couple of hours with a sub, and more often something like 3–4 hours. My physical stamina sometimes limits how long I top a scene, but I manage that in ways that keep both parties satisfied.

When it comes to an out-of-town sub visiting, I try to clear my schedule as much as possible. I've had a business-travelling regular for some months, and when he comes in we plan the arriving weekend in advance with some entertaining activities (outside of the dungeon) by way of reconnecting…whereafter, our evenings run to dinners out and play-evenings in my dungeon for the duration of his stay. It helps that there's a couple of weekly kinky activities 'round here. He gets to wear his collar amid friends, and that really pushes his buttons, whether or not he gets others paddled.

Lady Delilah Deb




LPslittleclip -> RE: Length of a session. (12/1/2008 8:07:30 PM)

as my  M'Lady said during the dungeon play the limited time does kinda suck as the scene seems to only last for a few minuets. the anticipation of the event really increases the effect. i would just love to have 3-4 hours of play like that to go until my M'lady was spent. now the kind of play makes a big difference as well as my M'lady said wax can be a long process with varied sensations, and the violent (violet) wand can achieve the effects very fast. a planned session can go completely different depending on how my M'lady uses the toys.




SthrnCom4t -> RE: Length of a session. (12/2/2008 1:12:41 AM)

I can lose hours down in my dungeon. When I know there are no time constraints, I've usually laid out a basic outline in my head of what I might want to do. Then I set an Intention. I always allow flexibility for the scene to flow along its natural course, and trust my intuition. After all, depending on my partner's reactions, different paths of opportunity are opened or avoided, for the best possible experience.

I can absolutely get in the Top space zone where time disappears. For me, the 'flight' we take together is very spiritual, and I'm seeking a deep connection. Preparation, take-off, flight, landing and aftercare can eat up hours.

When I know there are time constraints, I may compress a few of the steps and level of intensity, but have found that Aftercare/bonding is not an area I want to skimp on.




Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.03125