Rectum Stretcher

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Rectum Stretcher

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> Rectum Stretcher

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Rectum Stretcher - 11/29/2008 4:46:03 PM

califsue

Posts: 593
Joined: 2/2/2008
Status: offline

While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, 'What's your hurry?'

To which she replied, 'I' m late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide.'

'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole? ' he asked.

'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...'

Traffic Ticket - $95.00
Court Costs - $45.00
Look on the Cop's Face...............PRICELESS

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 11/29/2008 5:28:43 PM

Master4slvAnimal

Posts: 23
Joined: 10/26/2008
Status: offline

OH MY GOD, NOW THAT WAS IN FACT PRICELESS

(in reply to califsue)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 11/30/2008 2:36:47 AM

persephonee

Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to Master4slvAnimal)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 11/30/2008 3:16:55 AM

bondagelover1950

Posts: 122
Joined: 8/10/2008
Status: offline

LMAO

_____________________________

if she pleases you then run her down, bind and gag her and then carry her off

(in reply to persephonee)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 11/30/2008 9:45:27 AM

sirsholly

Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)

(in reply to bondagelover1950)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 11/30/2008 11:38:01 AM

BlackPhx

Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline

poenkitten

(in reply to califsue)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 12/4/2008 5:09:49 AM

angelina01

Posts: 16
Joined: 3/18/2008
Status: offline

(in reply to califsue)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 12/4/2008 5:16:16 AM

christal2112

Posts: 2
Joined: 1/14/2006
Status: offline

LMFAOOOO!!!

(in reply to angelina01)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 12/4/2008 3:48:07 PM

lilmissdefiant

Posts: 666
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline

_____________________________

Change what you can and accept what you can't.
He came to me one night. Explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! When satisfied, he left & I was hurt!!... Fu*king mosquito!

Resident Thread Killer

(in reply to christal2112)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Rectum Stretcher - 12/4/2008 7:48:34 PM

MarksFantasyGirl

Posts: 3660
Joined: 10/13/2005
Status: offline

Wish I would have the guts to say something like that! lol

_____________________________

--Fannie
AKA Savage's Fantasy
AKA Girl Dave
AKA Resident Flirt
AKA Sexy Hawt Woman

~*~Happily and proudly collared by my best friend~*~

Quitcher bitchen, and get out of the kitchen! ~Harry {3rdRock}

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)

Profile

Post #: 10