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RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 9:01:14 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

growing up as an abused child, that is a very hard limit for me. many times when i was growing up i either went to school with bruises or a black eye or was kept home "sick" because the bruises were too prominant to the point i couldn't see out of one or both eyes....so, you can see my main concern over this issue.


Well yes, of course. I would imagine, that if I had been abused as a child, alot of what I do enjoy now, .....I would not enjoy...it's hard to say...***hugs Michael***

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 9:12:49 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		thanks for the hug, Ma'am...i survived, am still barely surviving.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 9:15:49 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA

growing up as an abused child, that is a very hard limit for me. many times when i was growing up i either went to school with bruises or a black eye or was kept home "sick" because the bruises were too prominant to the point i couldn't see out of one or both eyes....so, you can see my main concern over this issue.



I have came in contact (closely and not so close) with and believe their are many like yourself that have had very difficult childhoods and even experiences as an adult that cause certain actions to be very emotional difficult if not impossible to consider doing or being done to them. These types of issues can't be forced upon the person... NO matter the "so-called" relationship type. For me these situations are not simply a "Hard Limit" as most people use the term, but it's a Boundary to be Respected out of the interest of ones personal emotional Well-Being. Only one person can make a choice in these situations and that is the person with the Boundary that needs to be Respected.

I Tip my hat at sharing something so personal.... Demonstrates Courage in my eyes. Thank you

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 9:20:15 AM   
michaelGA


Posts: 1194
Status: offline 		kinda makes life difficult to life with, doesn't it?

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 9:28:30 AM   
willing2serve


Posts: 385
Joined: 4/6/2004
Status: offline
quote:

This is one of my favourite activities but in my experience it's hard to find a Top who is (a) willing to do it and (b) enjoys it as much as I do. So mostly, I go without LOL


I have to agree, I love face slapping and find it very erotic. Before me, my Master had never slapped anyone, but he saw a need to push his own limits in O/our relationship.

I believe Sir has come to enjoy the action and reaction as much as I have.

Face slapping in O/our relationship is used in two forms and i do know the difference in each.

One, is the sensual erotic, pain/pleasure. The other is to get my attention quickly, both very effective in each purpose.

One thing i have learned is NOT to ask for it, even though i crave it at times, because whew, i sure will get it! To the moon alice...To the moon...LOL

The element of surprise makes it much more rewarding for me.



< Message edited by willing2serve -- 12/26/2005 9:31:21 AM >

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Definitely A Journey!

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 9:30:03 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

My favorite time was when he grabbed me by the hair with one hand, slapped my face with the other and growled "Scream bitch." I screamed *g*


LOL My favorite was always when he would walk in, slap me, tell me strip and bend over...and then ask who I was.....something so arousing and exciting about that

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 9:49:15 AM   
Sensualips


Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

sub doesn't like it and feels emotionally hurt or upset over this action


I would never intentionally emotionally hurt a partner, especially in the context of a scene. In a relationship emotional hurt is bound to happen at some point -- I try and minimize it and correct when possible. That is not to say I would never make a partner uncomfortable on purpose. I might. I expect the same in return. Sometimes discomfort is required for growth, and I am not limiting that to scene examples at all.

(in reply to michaelGA)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 10:25:42 AM   
LadyJulieAnn


Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline 		I love to faceslap my sub. I tend to do it to get shock value and also use it when I am verbally scolding or humiliating him. My sub is English, so I need to get color in those pale cheeks somehow.

(in reply to talmar)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 11:48:59 AM   
fastlane


Posts: 2159
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline 		I am much like KnightofMist, as I do it, but never to bruise, only as shock value.
Bring something unexpected into the scene. You have to slap just hard enough to have the sub think, WTF..was that?
But, just light enough to go back to her Ass, For the real Cheek slap, where bruises don't matter.

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 11:59:03 AM   
windy135


Posts: 437
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline 		I have been face slapped but no bruising it really is a shock value. I think the Dom enjoyed it even more than I did :)

(in reply to fastlane)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 12:12:20 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: talmar

Do you enjoy slapping your subs or bottoms in the face as a form of humiliation & pain? Subs & bottoms do you enjoy this activity or is it a hard limit for you?


I do not slap for humiliation or for pain (I consider the facial bones a bit fragile).

I slap because I can. Because our society says I shouldn't unless I've been offended. It gives me a sense of authority and it gives Fox a since of empowerment because he turns something that can be very negative in our culture (so silly if you've seen some of the tv and movies I have) into a positive form of service.


_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to talmar)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 12:35:28 PM   
sweetwhisper


Posts: 85
Joined: 11/28/2005
Status: offline 		funny lil story, i'll try to make it short - before i even knew what bdsm stood for - i was unhappily married (vanilla) one time during our regular boring missionary style sex he slapped me on the face - i was shocked, and i do mean SHOCKED, and my reaction was to slap him back and get very pissy about it - well, after that it stayed on my mind, and i would secretly hope that he'd do it again! but he never did, and i was too ashamed to ask for it ...lol...fast forward a few years and this is something that Master does with frequency, i enjoy it very much tho sometimes it's way harder than even i can take, and sometimes He strikes my eye by accident, usually because i move my head out of reflex, now this is the part that scares me - but we've been lucky so far and no damage has been done. It's a major turn on for the both of us. He has also slapped me for saying something stupid or disrespectful to Him, but usually it's been during play.

hugs & kisses!
sweetwhispers

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 12:39:48 PM   
sweetpettjenny


Posts: 674
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline 		My face bruises soooo easily , so face slapping is a tough question for me as i am in a proffessional , dental environment for work , i would never expose a patient to my bruised face.

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 1:25:12 PM   
talmar


Posts: 338
Joined: 11/13/2005
Status: offline 		Lots of scene people feel that way. I however love to be smacked in the face.

(in reply to MHOO314)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 1:29:23 PM   
talmar


Posts: 338
Joined: 11/13/2005
Status: offline 		I like that schocked feeling as well. I have never been hit hard enough to leave a briuse on my face...but my face has being slaped red bfore.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 1:34:11 PM   
talmar


Posts: 338
Joined: 11/13/2005
Status: offline 		I have topped a few times but I haven't yet slapped a sub. It is something I would like to try if it isn't a hardlimit of my scene partner.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 1:43:49 PM   
addcted2it


Posts: 78
Joined: 10/28/2004
From: Sonoma County, California, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: talmar

Do you enjoy slapping your subs or bottoms in the face as a form of humiliation & pain? Subs & bottoms do you enjoy this activity or is it a hard limit for you?


I have talked to various Dommes about this, and suprisingly some believe that it can cause jaw problems and result in a concussion. Well, yeah...we often do a lot of things that may cause physical harm if not done correctly! I guess it depends upon how hard someone is slapped.

So, I can only assume that reasonable care would be used in order to minimize the risks involved.

- addcted2it


_____________________________

Submission is not an excuse to abuse.
Life is short! Live it to the fullest!

(in reply to talmar)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 1:49:25 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

some believe that it can cause jaw problems and result in a concussion.


Um, we're talking about "slapping"; not boxing.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to addcted2it)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 1:55:31 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

some believe that it can cause jaw problems and result in a concussion.


Um, we're talking about "slapping"; not boxing.



It is a good idea to hold the lower part of the face in the other hand while slapping and to slap so that the hand does not go over the ear. The holding will prevent the jaw from moving when hit from the other side and avoiding the ear will prevent compression injuries

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Face slapping - 12/26/2005 2:16:48 PM   
MTslave


Posts: 153
Joined: 12/15/2005
Status: offline 		Greetings!!
Much like what has been stated once already, I myself, had a very long conversation about anything done for humiliation purposes with the man who would become my Master. In fact we had a lot of conversations about this. I told him about how I grew up under the constant degregation and humiliation of my grandmother and how it left me with an extrodinary low self esteem. However when we spoke about it it was not to say "absolutely not" it was to give to my Mater the information that he needed to make educated and informed decisions when it came to me.

I am very grateful that my Master has decided to not, use humiliation in any, extrodinary way. Now that does not mean that we don't do things that might not humilate or rather embarass someone else. But those things were done with the information I gave to him held in the foremost of his mind and done slowly... learning... teaching... reaching new boundaries together.

I to this day have a hard time with the word humilation itself. It still brings to mind images of my grandmother berating me for this or that and telling me how I'll never amount to anything and how ugly I'd remain if I didn't lose weight. But I can say, that with an open mind and a great vocabulary.... one can push themselves and always learn new things.

Respectfully submitted
Master T's slave

_____________________________

Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk everything, you risk even more.”- Erica Jong

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 40
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